#1 | Friends Pt.1

00:00:00:00 – 00:00:29:02
Hello and welcome to Lads Anonymous, a podcast about two best mates of over 20 years. Invite you to join their safe space where all manner of subjects will be discussed. Every conceivable topic is fair game. We'll focus on a specific subject first to chew the fat over climax it. I'll fucking love that way, climaxing with the most clandestine questions, pressing dilemmas, or thirst for advice.

00:00:29:04 – 00:00:48:23
All handled with a no no. I can't even say anonymous. Yeah. Anonymity neither. But man. Yeah, there you go. Thank you. Thank you very much. Hang on. People know who we are. How is it? Anonymous. Know the people that send in the stuff. Anybody mention their names because we're gentlemen. Is it of. That's anonymous opinion and first hole that kind of thing.

00:00:49:00 – 00:01:07:14
Yeah pretty much yeah. The and like Reddit as well those it's like a blend. So we do our stuff and then we welcome everyone into the circle. You might start us off then. What can I be so bold as to start us off with something I, I noticed recently. Yeah, go for it. You know, Adele, she lost like that.

00:01:07:16 – 00:01:34:10
She's great. Right? She can sing. She's really good. Yeah, she. Yeah. She's amazing. And then. And then, you know, she's followed by people who are. And ladies who are, plus sized and beautiful with it and beautiful with it. Rick. Yeah, yeah, but like that section of, support base of, that section of her fans were fuming with her when she lost weight.

00:01:34:10 – 00:01:57:07
Like, they're, well, angry with her because she went away in private but disappeared for eight months. Come back. She'd lost all the weight, and she looked like a completely different woman. They were fuming with that. How could you do that? So said all support. You know, with, you know, plus size. You know, they were they don't want to listen to me anymore because she lost all the weight.

00:01:57:09 – 00:02:09:08
Because she didn't tell them that's what she was doing. Done in secret. They just they just standing there. What what what we meant to do with this. Now, what we do is we know. Do you?

00:02:09:10 – 00:02:31:11
Like idiots. What? They like. This is how rude. Included us in this because it will ruin now. And it send out the news. Like, why don't you mention in the newsletter you told us to talk or they tell us this, like all the good advice we get from life coaches is this go out, do it in silence, do it in the dark.

00:02:31:11 – 00:02:54:06
And then when you're ready, unleash cell phone on the public or unleash yourself on a project. So she's done that. She's taken all the good advice and all of a fans that are, carrying a bit of timber, furious with her. How could you do this? We were in this together. Well, funny, I would be as well. I should mention that, okay.

00:02:54:06 – 00:03:21:10
We are basically. So my name is Ricky, and I'm going to be the the host of Lads Anonymous, and I'm joined by that said, best mate. Yeah. Flav. And before I want to, if this if, if you've just stumbled across this podcast and you don't know who we are. So Flav and I have been best mates over 20 years, but more importantly, we do a podcast, Will flava.

00:03:21:12 – 00:03:47:09
A podcast called the Flying Coq AU podcast will be running for many years. So yeah, I well, it is yours, but I'm part of it. When I'm 13 years and has a Patreon. He also does another podcast called James and Flav for now. Yeah, he basically has got podcasts coming out of his ass. He's also be a also regular on Sky Sports on Saturday morning people.

00:03:47:10 – 00:04:10:01
Now is it Saturday Saturday social. What's that? What's Saturday social? Yeah. Yeah. It's you know, you've got you right y you know, but I, I need to just boost up, you know. Yeah. But not beast it up. Just want to go local. He's on Saturday socials so let's better listen to this then, is it. No, I'm just introducing you as, a famous podcast.

00:04:10:03 – 00:04:34:12
Oh, but what would you say in your job? Would you say if you up to, you know, you fit in at a job application or any application. Yeah. And it says occupation. What do you write? Well, I write I mean, I write director because I, you know, see if that's the answer. I write the writer because that's the I'm the sole director of the fighting cock.

00:04:34:14 – 00:04:54:21
I mean, I'm sorry, Tank Productions Limited, but that doesn't mean I direct anybody. I'm just on my own in my room recording podcast. You know, that's one that's good. The best thing about having your own office is you can talk one out whenever you want. Like, I close the door. No one can come in because there's a lock and I can put the blinds down there.

00:04:54:23 – 00:05:20:07
I can't I've been in this office 18 months. I can't tell you the amount of times I'm not one out in there. I can't make loans loads, to be fair, if I. Yeah. I mean, like I said, if I, if I have my own office, I've got my own working from home office, but it's more of a kind of what you can see is it looks like a normal room, but over that side there's all my fishing gear, there's just boxes everywhere.

00:05:20:07 – 00:05:46:03
And I don't think I could get, I could get honed up with everything that's around me. I need, well, you know, candles lit, a some, like, a good music, like Lionel Richie playing. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. But, yeah, I couldn't I couldn't ever do that, but, Sorry. No. That's fine. That's absolutely fine. So,

00:05:46:05 – 00:06:08:01
Yeah, that's what I do. And so that's why I mention that we're, going to do pick a main topic topic pick this week. Should we, should we jump straight into it or on what is it? Today's topic is friends. That's right. Friend. Not that, not the TV show, although I've been rewatching that recently and it is quite good.

00:06:08:01 – 00:06:27:10
You I might as wicked so friends was amazing for years and years consistently excellent. It was like 30 minutes. You didn't have to think it's hilarious. Like it's. Yeah, it's great. Like anyone who sort of says friends is a shit is a fucking dickhead, don't they? They're just saying it's be performative. It's I'm, it's beneath me. Well, you can get in the bin.

00:06:27:10 – 00:06:57:17
I don't want to talk to you. You're beneath me. Like, literally. If you got anything to say to someone who looks down on someone. Because I enjoy friends. No, no, I wouldn't know. I. Well, I very much enjoy it. It's a great show. I can't stand it. Rick, if anyone has a different opinion of me than that in music film, a TV show is like, it's a it's all subjective, but if anyone has a different opinion than mine, I genuinely hate them for that moment.

00:06:57:19 – 00:07:25:20
Anyone who criticizes Radiohead, I hate them, genuinely hate them. Yeah, yeah, it's weird. It it it shouldn't care. Rick, I've lost when I, when when I used to, criticize Radiohead just for. It was a dickhead, right? Yeah. That's. Well, I mean, that is true, right? An Oxford dictionary, right? This is what friends is, apparently. Or friend.

00:07:25:21 – 00:08:07:14
Yeah. A person with whom one has developed a close and informal relationship of mutual trust and intimacy. Brackets more generally a close acquaintance, often with adjective indicating the closeness of the relationship, such as best, good, close, etc.. I mean, for me, a mate or like best mate is just someone that you can tell stuff to and they're not going to be, a blabbermouth or enjoy your demise or bad news or, or not be happy for your good news.

00:08:07:16 – 00:08:29:15
And it's funny you say that. So, like, in terms of sharing good news or bad news, not someone's not going to blab about their bad news. I generally consider Alex from Bristol, obviously in my close circle of friends. Yeah, but I'm always ready to share his bad news. So funny. But I've shared about him. You shouldn't. And I know it's bad like that time you got touched up in like.

00:08:29:15 – 00:08:47:10
And you know, the things happened to him and you just feel I shouldn't be. I shouldn't enjoy this as much as I am. Like, there's one I quite regret. I shouldn't say, I shouldn't say I'm doing it again. Yes, I'm doing it again. I shouldn't say, but he's he basically when he was 16. And this isn't funny at all.

00:08:47:12 – 00:09:04:18
I shouldn't say it. This is a podcast. I shouldn't say, oh, it's going to be Alex in Bristol if you're listening to this and go, what happened in it when you're 16, you shouldn't even do that. No, no. But then the he's it's up to him whether or not he says yeah, he wants to share. Then it's not on me is it.

00:09:04:19 – 00:09:30:12
It's on him. Yeah. You. But you've put that on him now. Yeah, I know, but now it's his choice whether it's he wants to share it and I appreciate I shouldn't have said I should have started this, but I have and this is going out because we're not bloody and no edits, no edit. So Yeah. So yeah, just I mean, if you can find him on Twitter, ask him what happened in, with the landlady when you were 16.

00:09:30:14 – 00:10:00:21
You wouldn't shared him, but you would say, Rick the good. Yeah. You fucking better not do it. They would. I would know, wouldn't you know, I don't know, I might not know. You know, I haven't you you haven't. Yeah. But you haven't gone through what he had with the landlady when he was 16. See if you had a might have had to share that to, to see, so it's only stuff if it's like, if it's really bad stuff like health wise and I don't share.

00:10:00:23 – 00:10:24:23
But if it's juicy, if it's if it's spicy stuff. Yeah. That is the best do in the world of service. You know, this is I'm such a bad friend that when, when he told me that I was one of only two people in the world that knew about that, now everyone knows. Oh, God. Yeah. So this is I mean, this is quite topical about friends and what what, what a friend is.

00:10:24:23 – 00:10:48:11
Maybe if he listens to this, which I don't think he will, but we do. He does consider me a friend, and I consider him a friend. Yeah. Good friend. Yeah, I'd say so. I would do anything for Alex. Yeah. Apart from not share his personal stories. I didn't would with them. I would do anything for him. I'm going to take it back to how we first met.

00:10:48:13 – 00:11:15:13
The the beginning, the groundwork of where our relationship began. So at this time, you will know this, very much, so weird. But we'd first met each other on a football forum. We don't need to say the name of that said football for him, but, because you don't want people searching, trying to dig up the conversations we had as fucking teenagers.

00:11:15:15 – 00:11:40:13
Because it's just awful. And then we used to chat on MSN as well. Do you remember MSN? Yeah, of course I remember him. I said my favorite thing about MSN. Like for the most people now everyone listening this will know about MSN. What how massive it was for people of our age back then. It yeah, but my favorite thing was we would stay in contact quite a lot of the day.

00:11:40:13 – 00:12:06:05
Every day, because you lived with your general, living with your dad. Yeah. Yeah. So. So when we, when we when we, When we were chatting first, I was back in. I would have been back in Milton Keynes then, I think. And then it was the Middle Kingdom. Yeah, in Milton Keynes. And then I, did my college course.

00:12:06:07 – 00:12:27:22
Course? Yeah. National Diploma in Media Studies, which is, you know, set me in great stead. No. That one. Yeah, I did, I well, I got a distinction in it. So, triple distinction. That was this the course was this the course we did? Whenever you can I say you go on because I found the video tape, didn't I.

00:12:27:24 – 00:12:51:11
The. So is was this the course where you had to remake the streets video. What was the source? Yes. Exactly. It so we had to recreate, recreate a music video. And because I love the streets, I decided to recreate, It's too late. It's too late. It's too late. And if I ever needed you, would you be there?

00:12:51:13 – 00:13:18:05
So, Rick, for some reason kept the VHS that I. He still got it. It must be somewhere. It must be somewhere. Is it? It was a little disc CD. I was a CD digital CD player. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So this was amazing. So we. Rick, I, I'm moving forward of the story, but there was a, there was a scenario where me and Rick were baked in his room, and I don't know how it came to.

00:13:18:05 – 00:13:41:09
Maybe I was looking for his shit in his room. And I found a CD that said Media Projects the streets is too late, and we watched it in his DVD player and watched it, and it was the best thing I've ever seen. I put it on and he showed me and then never showed me again. And it for the last 15 years of our relationship, I've been desperate to see this thing again.

00:13:41:11 – 00:13:59:09
And you want to show it to me? No I'm not. Surely you're an age now that you could show it to me again. I could, but I don't want I don't physically want to look at it. I don't want to hear it. Like always say, it's one of those things where when you listen to the and the mental, you take him back to that video.

00:13:59:09 – 00:14:16:24
When you listen to it. I don't listen to them, don't listen to that song. It's not even in my playlist or anything. It's not only Street Song that is not in my playlist. This is the name of this podcast. These two late. I really, really want to see it again. Rick. If I was terminally ill, would you show it to me?

00:14:17:01 – 00:14:46:02
Yes. Okay, I am Rick, I am I can now send it to me. I would never send it. I might have it on me on and play it. Yeah, please. But then, then to see it again, there was one video running in slow motion. Yeah. You could jump down some stairs if I remember. Yeah. No, that's that's a second one, which I was hoping you didn't remember, but we had to recreate an opening scene from a film and, I did Trainspotting.

00:14:46:02 – 00:15:06:11
Trainspotting. And that was it. That was amazing. Fuck. What? Do you remember this stuff? I don't know, because I've got a bad memory, but that does stuff like greatness. You can't. And that was a great period of our lives. That was great. Yeah. It was just to go back to MSN. So you would you would say, yeah, yeah, gone, gone.

00:15:06:12 – 00:15:25:14
Well I just we would talk. But what I was fascinated every time we'd speak would be what was going on. Because he was living at your dad's house, then your media degree. Yeah. So I done the media degree and afterwards I had, I had always had this longing to move to London. I don't know what it was.

00:15:25:20 – 00:15:57:22
You know, the pull of the big city. I always wanted to move there. And at that time I was around a lot 23. And a lot of my mates were, in, like, long term relationships, even married, having kids, kids in the way houses. And although, like, I'm still like obviously like really good mates with them, but, there was just something missing in my life that I just wasn't getting, like, I just felt stuck.

00:15:57:24 – 00:16:19:15
And then we were chatting over MSN, meeting up at the football on this fan's forum, and then I needed to I wanted to move to London. So I got a runners job at a production company, and I was living at my dad's for three months until I got kicked out. And that's when we would chat on, MSN there as well.

00:16:19:15 – 00:16:41:08
And it was fucking awkward because the computer, the main computer, I was you, yeah, I know exactly how was inside of me and means how a computer in the houses. Yeah, the main tower computer was in the front room, so they're watching TV, and I'm like, talk to you on MSN. Like. Yeah, it's just it was amazing because you you did.

00:16:41:13 – 00:17:05:01
You was like, what? How old you would be in early 2023. Yeah 2053. So you're in your dad's flat and, he's married to a lady who. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And, I loved her. I never met her, but I loved her, and she would. I could imagine you sitting at the tower. Computer. The main computer in the house, and I just boring.

00:17:05:03 – 00:17:25:07
Is she in the background? They say I can't. I can't really do the story justice without. It. Doesn't matter. But the, Yeah, that was that was an interesting so. But then you use like it's interesting when it. Right. Because we were I was like all right well you've you want to get out of that place. You want to come to London, just come live with us.

00:17:25:09 – 00:17:47:24
Me and my. Yeah. Girlfriend at the time. Yeah. So I, I was kicked out my dad's. It wasn't like a kicked out because I'd been naughty. Apparently my dad's partner, niece was supposed to be moving in with them, and I was just, like, I could move in as a stopgap. That was the story they tell me about.

00:17:48:01 – 00:18:11:13
Like, she didn't wanted me out, and, and I and and at that time, my mum come to pick me up, and, she was obviously distraught for me. And we had agreed. We chatted and you said, why don't you come and stay at my house with, my, my missus at the time. Yeah. Well, we'll we'll take it from there.

00:18:11:13 – 00:18:34:03
And like, it's not thinking back to it is so fucking weird that, I, I've moved into your house, you know, I mean, I, we we didn't know we met. We'd been out in London a few times. You had stayed over. It wasn't like we hadn't met. Yeah. No, exactly. But, it wasn't like, childhood mates or any from uni or anything like that.

00:18:34:05 – 00:18:59:11
And it was all kind of that internet phase. And my mum wouldn't come and pick me up. And we were chatting in the car, and she knew that me going to you and to your house and being with, you and your, partner at the time. Yeah, that is good for me. And she said to me, like, if you come back to Milton Keynes now, after this three month time in London, you'll never get back to London.

00:18:59:13 – 00:19:18:08
It breaks my heart that you're feeling this, this low and that you've been kicked out your dad's and, But, you know, will look after you. And your your, No, not like just she was just like I was aware of this, Rick. Well, you know, no, in my head, I was just like. Yeah, just come with us, see what happens.

00:19:18:08 – 00:19:40:01
No, she you know, it was. And I remember pulling it away like. Like with all, all my possessions. Then transfer to your house. I, I, I remember being upset at that time, but in my head I was completely unaware that this was significant for you. In my head, I was just like, yeah, just come and stay out for a bit, okay?

00:19:40:03 – 00:19:53:23
Get on your feet, get a job, find a place to live. Let's just see what happens. I didn't I didn't think, oh, I'm offering Ricky a way out here. I didn't think of any of that. I just thought, let's get turn up, let's get stoned. And and watch telly in that. That's what I thought was gonna happen to be great.

00:19:54:00 – 00:20:16:13
I didn't know that this was a seismic thing in your life till now. Yeah. It was. Yeah, it was hugely. Because at the time, I was sitting there thinking because I was on your, pull out, sofa bed, and I was sitting there and I was thinking, I have no job, I have no home. And I'm in London, like, with my internet friends.

00:20:16:15 – 00:20:35:17
It's fucking like it's all, like, homeless and jobless and just being in London, thinking back to it now, it's like fucking. Wow. That's. That was a kind of, Yeah. I didn't go to bed that night thinking, oh, Ricky must be stressed out at this moment. I just went to bed and thought, this is cool. Ricky's going to be there in the morning.

00:20:35:19 – 00:20:53:15
You went to bed high, high as fuck. Yeah, probably. Yeah. Yeah, I think I was. I was completely unaware of that. I didn't realize, yeah. Even to this, I mean, it makes complete sense now. Now that you said it, but at the time, it was just like, this is this is going to be fun. It was and like, yeah, I was, yeah.

00:20:53:16 – 00:21:19:00
It's fucking it was a huge thing for me. And time in my life of, we. Friends. But it all worked out for the fucking best, like there was. I mean, I've said this to you many a time, but again, with, it was just kind of like, this is this sounds like, you know, blowing smoke up one's ass and all that, lol.

00:21:19:01 – 00:21:42:21
And I don't really it's hard to talk about about sounding like a dick. Living and, in Milton Keynes, all we did, you know, I Wetherspoons. Yates's get pissed, get fucked up. I go to work. There was 4 or 5 main companies in Milton Keynes at that time, and everybody about their everybody knew each other's businesses, all living in each other and in each other's pockets.

00:21:42:21 – 00:22:02:20
I just needed to to get out. And I always thought that you you obviously have to be a certain way, look a certain way, feel a certain way. But then when I met you and we used to go out and get belted, but then your house was full of, like, classic literature and art, and I was like.

00:22:02:22 – 00:22:27:23
I was just amazed that I just thought these, like, like, nerds are into books and art and stuff like that. And then they weren't geezers. Do you know what I mean? Yeah. No, no, no, not really. Just because I know. I don't know what you mean. Because where we grew up and what I grew up around that was, that was that that that was normal.

00:22:27:23 – 00:22:53:13
That is normal. Like my dad read and my mum read and she she made me into that stuff. And it made sense to do the I don't know, I, I mean, again, I didn't I was aware that she was looking around the house look at think feeling this way. Yeah. I mean it's like you we were sitting there chatting mundane use like, oh, do you, do you read?

00:22:53:13 – 00:23:13:21
And I said, like, I enjoy reading. And you were like, read this book. It will change. It will change everything for you. You know what book you gave me? Was it? And I feel like I've had this conversation 1984. Yeah. It was, it was what of it? And it was it was at that time where I was going for huge changes in my life.

00:23:13:21 – 00:23:38:08
Obviously coming away from Milton Keynes, everything I've ever known, not having a job, being with you and all these different kind of things about my life that I realized that I could do, that I didn't think I could, and then read nine, eight, four changed my life. Then I was just reading books, flying through them. But yet we were still having this amazing time.

00:23:38:08 – 00:23:58:05
And in, in those, like, seven years. That was in London. Not obviously not living with Eve seven years, because that would be fucking. It was actually only with with us. I felt like a couple of weeks. Yeah. It's like three weeks or something. Then. And then I found, a room three rows away from you. Terrace. Yeah.

00:23:58:05 – 00:24:14:01
Yeah. Yeah, exactly. So, yeah. You, But. Yeah, but what else are you gonna do? You found it. But it was a great place to live, though. The crowd was incredible, a place to live. And we were moving into a near, like a time of our lives where. All right, we weren't wealthy. We didn't have any money at all.

00:24:14:01 – 00:24:37:01
What? We will fucking skin. But we managed to find enough money for the weekend. Yeah, and that's what I think. That's. That was why it was the best. The best thing. Right. Because you had. No. Yeah. No children. Just it was at each other and and £100 in our pocket. Exactly. And there was a time that, you know, like I saying that my mum was like, dropping me off.

00:24:37:01 – 00:24:57:03
Tears in her eyes, like my baby boy. I thought, no, I don't know what's going to happen, but it's just gone through a traumatic time. And I was like, is this the right thing? Moving in with my internet friends? Have, and then we went out and we got belted and we came back, I don't know if you remember this.

00:24:57:03 – 00:25:28:11
And, we were hungry, and you cooked a veggie burger. Yeah, I do remember it. Yeah. The first time we went out. Yeah. And we come back at that time, veggie burgers. At that time, I would. I had again, no job, no money, no house. But we'd been to the pub, we'd been pacing ourselves, laughing all day and then had these veggie burgers, not I, I remember feeling that moment of content ness and happiness and joy, even though I didn't have anything.

00:25:28:11 – 00:25:45:16
I had a fucking veggie burger. That's what I. Yeah, and I was feeling so much joy. And that's when I knew I was like, this is, this is the guy, this is we where I need to be. We we we I don't know how interesting this is for people to listen to you, but we when, when whenever I spoke to you, I was laughing.

00:25:45:18 – 00:26:16:17
And to this day, it remains the same. So yeah. Yeah. Don't know. That's what it was. It was good. It was. And then obviously there was, for out those years, it was very, a heady experience, quite, chaotic at times. With everything involved, like drinks, drugs, music, football. It was just an absolute amazing, time.

00:26:16:17 – 00:26:46:01
I want to go back and do it again. You may I may I think about it all the time. Just the things. There's just things that pop up in my mind that, that just make me laugh. The pickles we got ourselves into, and just different things like that. But, like, we're actually I. What I do when I ask you about is, when I arrived on the scene, I didn't I didn't really meet any of your mates.

00:26:46:03 – 00:26:55:14
I didn't, I didn't I didn't really, there was Ginger, Dave Ford, Dave and Fred.

00:26:55:16 – 00:27:18:02
And I only met them not once or Isa. You didn't like Dave because he was like, I think I lecture. Yeah, I saw the new. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right. So yeah, I didn't, I didn't have any I didn't really have any friends, I didn't I had Fred from University, Ginger Dave from University, and they were mates, as it turns out.

00:27:18:02 – 00:27:36:06
They weren't. They were. They were, you know, you should have shared experiences with people, don't you? And you spend the time in your life with them and you have a common goal with that in that moment. So if was at university, that would be getting pissed and getting for your degree. And and you're living far away from home, so you attach yourself to people because they're in the same situation as you.

00:27:36:06 – 00:27:53:17
But you're not friends, right? You and you consider yourself friends. But as time plays out, you realize that you weren't right. You were. You were people that you had a common goal with. Right? And it's just the way it is. And you go through life picking up these people and then and then putting them down and they'll put you down and whatever it might be.

00:27:53:19 – 00:28:15:06
So that was what was that was Dave boring Dave, as you put it. I would work with him and and that was we were kind of friends through work, but as soon as we didn't work to each other, we barely spoke for it. So it was it was that kind of thing. So I never I'd never found my, my friendship group.

00:28:15:06 – 00:28:45:21
And part of that is because I had five brother have five brothers. Right. And when you've got five brothers who would die for you, you don't need friends. That that everything, everything you need you have in your family. Because. And that remains to this day, is that regardless of what happens to me, I know I've got five people that will that will back me up in whatever situation I'm in or if I need help will provide it, or if need, you know, anything that they're there for me because they're my family, right?

00:28:45:21 – 00:29:12:24
They're my blood. So so I had that. So I didn't ever feel like I needed anything else. And actually, you were the first person that, outside of that, that broke that, that bad mindset. But it was a subconscious mindset. It wasn't something I wasn't it wasn't like I was not looking for friends. Just you come on. And and you remember how quickly you were sort of incorporated into my brothers, my circle of brothers, literally.

00:29:12:24 – 00:29:35:15
Yeah. And that wasn't easy, Rick. That didn't like, as you see in some, some have come of tried in the past and they were quite they I don't think again, because we had each other, we didn't subconsciously it was a subconscious thing. No one was allowed in basically because other than, you know, you had work mates that came in, but it's actually a part of it.

00:29:35:17 – 00:29:55:01
No one really was allowed in on a subconscious level because it was like, well, why? I'm going to spend time talking to you. And I've got these guys to talk to. Anyway, you made it in Rick. I know I am, the chosen one, the lucky one. Yeah, it was a yeah, it was, it was absolutely amazing.

00:29:55:01 – 00:30:15:16
Obviously, spending the time in London with, you and your brothers and, the escapades we had, you could be annoying Rick. And I'll tell you why. You could be annoying. Why you'll remember this. And as soon as I being to say it, you'll be like, oh, yeah, fucking. You was obsessed with how my brother Ryan dressed. And he did dress well.

00:30:15:18 – 00:30:35:02
Yeah. And at the beginning of our relationship, you wouldn't stop fucking banging on about his winkle picker shoes and these peacoat that yet. And I get you liked it, but you would message me every single time we spoke, because I'd kept forgetting to ask him about where he got them from. You would like Aisha Barbara about his winkle pickers.

00:30:35:04 – 00:30:50:13
Remember about his Winkle, because I fucking oh record. You know what I'm like you getting budget and I'm getting to the. The last thing I want in my, in my life is people that badger me or give me advice when it's not asked for. Right. That's, that's a, that's a failing in my character. But I can't get rid of it.

00:30:50:15 – 00:31:03:18
You kept banging on about the winkle pickers, and I pay that a day. Wait, do you know where he got them from? I can't remember. Do you remember Russell and Bromley?

00:31:03:20 – 00:31:24:16
Fuck. Well, did you get some? Yeah, I did actually. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. At the. Yeah. I was gonna say. Do you remember that time when, we, we we were supposed to do it like a mandate to the London Aquarium. Yeah. And, we went out early in the morning. It was pissing down with rain from the underground.

00:31:24:16 – 00:31:43:24
So we're like, let's just run over to that pub opposite, and we'll just hold up there, until the rain blows over. Yeah. And as we go in there to have a pint, we, like, just bumped into your brother Ross. Yeah. No, it was Ryan. It was Ryan. Yeah. It's Ryan. And then in the end, we fucked off going to London.

00:31:44:00 – 00:32:06:19
The fact that it smells like beer in gear. Yeah, yeah. Is that what happened? Yeah, absolutely. And then, we went to Carnaby Street. God knows why we were there. And it was just a blur of a night. And I remember waking up and there was something on my legs. It's like, what the fuck is that? And there is a, a pair of Russian brumby shoes I bought them.

00:32:06:22 – 00:32:25:08
Yeah, I don't remember if I remember any of it. That was it. That was that randomness that that I remember specifically that day. Now, I haven't thought about that for years and years and years. You was supposed to go to the aquarium just on that. Can we go to the aquarium? Yes. I'd love to take the the girls would be interested in it.

00:32:25:10 – 00:32:44:16
If not, don't know if they would be. I'm pretty sure I've just been them off. If it's for me, anyway, I'd definitely that. Should we go? Yeah. Well, we design London Aquarium or. I mean, that's the best one in it. Probably we should do some research where the sharks are. Skegness. Who's got the most, Is it really?

00:32:44:16 – 00:33:02:22
Apparently that's like the biggest aquarium in the UK is in Skegness. The problem is, is it's. You'd have to be in Skegness was an absolute whole of a place. Yeah. But they've got like I've got a voucher Rick, I've got a voucher to dive with the Sharks in Skegness. Have you had a two hour dive training. I've, I told you about all he only boy for me for Christmas.

00:33:02:22 – 00:33:23:23
Two hour dive train. And then. And then you go in the big tank and dive with them. But. But Skegness is a mileage from us. So literally it's a mission to get there. But, we should. We should definitely do it. I love me and you bobbing around in a massive fish tank of equality. I'm going to move one slightly.

00:33:24:00 – 00:33:46:16
As you say, that is miles away from you. We live miles away from each other. Now, do you think the I mean, obviously the physicality of going to a boozer every fucking weekend and weekdays and that, that, that the, the friendship and life we led back in on is vastly different to what we have now did.

00:33:46:20 – 00:34:08:08
Like with that dynamic changing like how do you feel? Is it is it the US? It's still the same friendship as it always was. Is it? I mean, you can't say no, it's a bit more shit because though, were you at number one was like you and your wife basically ruined it by having kids. And so that isn't it true.

00:34:08:08 – 00:34:29:03
So like, we had such a great time, you had your flat in crouch and lovely flat to bed or no one bed, and it was right on Crouch and Broadway, and we'd go back there for a m in the morning. Just get getting on there. It was, well, brilliant, brilliant place that just plot up. It was literally we would go for pints and stuff in Crouch End and crouch in.

00:34:29:03 – 00:34:45:05
Back then was a quality little night out. Now it was really good and we would be getting pissed up every Friday night and then we'd walk through the off license. The only off license, it was open in Crouch End and we'd walk through it and they knew us because they knew you reek because you lived above their shop.

00:34:45:10 – 00:35:03:03
So we just without even thought it was mental. We'd walk through the shop without even saying hello and just drove into their back bit through the old bloke making tea and soup and you always seemed to be there regardless. Every time and night there was this old Turkish man who would just be making food in the back of this place, open the massive door and go up to.

00:35:03:04 – 00:35:20:18
It was almost like an unwritten rule that we allowed, because you lived upstairs and we'd go up there and until the light came up, we'd be like listening to music, chatting and having a laugh. And then your message gets pregnant and ruins it. Oh, yeah, she did ruin it, didn't she? But you ruined it as well. Don't blame it on me.

00:35:20:20 – 00:35:45:01
Why did you keep coming in a. What I know well over it is after we got engaged. So it was. It was the, What did you think? Well, it's time to have a baby. No, no, I didn't think. Is it time? Is it time to say it was, She got caught up in the moment of being engaged and that headedness of, you know, young and in love.

00:35:45:03 – 00:36:04:11
You was, in fact, I wasn't thinking, I was thinking, and I knew exactly what was happening, but I didn't care at that time. I was, you know, it just doesn't happen. See? And then it and then it does. I mean, you you you as we know it, it's world renowned. How virile you are. You're potent. And I did I didn't understand at the time, but I do now.

00:36:04:14 – 00:36:26:16
Yeah. So I just on the back, Yeah. So so so it obviously changed, but it doesn't, it didn't as, as as you grow older, you realize that you can't like the idea really of us now going out in London. And then it just mentioned earlier about wanting to do it again. I want to go back to that life.

00:36:26:18 – 00:36:44:04
I don't think I could do it. I wouldn't enjoy it in the same. It was it was of that time. We were we were certain type of people. There. And I don't think the idea of going and get mashed in London now isn't it's not something I'd want to do, because I've got older and, and I fear to come down.

00:36:44:06 – 00:37:04:20
It's, I never, ever felt like I was made of fucking Teflon back then and nothing could stop me. And and and no amount of drugs and alcohol that I put in me would put me down, and I'd be able to rise the next day and just crack on. Whereas now, fuck man, I'm scared of a pint now. Rick.

00:37:04:22 – 00:37:16:15
Yeah, I am totally in by it. Oh, like I cannot handle. I could never handle.

00:37:16:17 – 00:37:33:07
Awful. What was that you said you could never handle? What, never handle my booze. So say it. Say it. Because it got out there, so I'm just going to edit it to give a say. So I could never handle puppies or any. I can never handle my booze. I've never been able to handle my booze.

00:37:33:07 – 00:38:00:03
It's just one of those, things. And now, as I get into the late stages of my life, like the hangovers go for 3 or 4 days, the anxiety is mad, so I would. Yeah. Free choice. Like, when we met up for my birthday and the the, you know, the fighting cock, social that we did, like, that's that's enough for, like, to last me a month, six weeks.

00:38:00:08 – 00:38:22:19
I've been there, and I know it's, like, pretty, over the top old Ricky style getting pissed up then, and I don't I don't want to do that again now, but it's so, so, so our relationship has changed in that respect. But it becomes more it becomes more intellectual. Ricky becomes more about, you, the drugs and the alcohol.

00:38:22:19 – 00:38:43:23
But then that was the that was the basis of our friendship. Right. And an actual friendship is lasted beyond that and that that's why we can legitimately call each other friends. Right? Because, you know, it wasn't there were so many people we met during that 3 or 4 year period that I loved. I not for this guy's amazing.

00:38:44:03 – 00:39:00:09
I never I'm never not want to know this guy. I never want to drop me. I never I never want a world to exist where on a Friday night I don't meet this guy or this person, and we and we have a great time. There are tons of people that we've met. I've been in houses of people. I can't even remember their names now.

00:39:00:10 – 00:39:20:10
I just remember their faces. And I thought that that was never going to end. But it did because we weren't friends. We just took drugs together. Yeah. Do you remember that actor's house? Can't remember his name? No. In lived in Hornsey. He was in Band of Brothers in that. Just get him. Yeah, I did Inglewood in his beautiful flat.

00:39:20:12 – 00:39:56:18
I can't even remember his name. And I've done all sorts in there, and I can't now I. Yeah, I can't remember Dougie something. Yeah. I didn't say the name. That's, But yeah, I haven't I met okay brothers and Dougie, we need to know, but what an amazing, amazing, heady time. But, Yeah, I think, like, again, even though we're not in each other's pockets like we were back then, I still I still have that, now I'm still best of mates, man.

00:39:56:22 – 00:40:19:15
Yeah. Still ringing each other all the time. I don't watch those, but, Yeah. Do you know what that is? That was going to be in my second part, I because I've said this to you a few times. Right. And I've, I've seen you kind of recoil a bit when I've said the word best, mate. And you're like, I don't have, best mates now because we're not children anymore, Ricky.

00:40:19:17 – 00:40:41:08
But you say best mates all the time, so that makes me feel I have to say it. And I'm disrespecting you. If I don't say it, that's okay. Well, Well, I'm just trying to. I'm trying to process. Is it? I'm saying. But if you were to kind of, say, okay, we'll just we'll just name each other, call you good mates, then you.

00:40:41:12 – 00:41:04:13
Then the thing is, if you say good mates to someone else, like it puts us equal, all right? Fucking equal to them. No chance. No fucking chance. It doesn't matter, Ricky. We don't have to put labels on this thing we know. Right? So that's all that matters. But you want a label D. But no, we're going to end this will end this part now because you're making me upset and I don't want to be upset.

00:41:04:13 – 00:41:35:07
On the first episode of our podcast. Right. If you're ready to spice up the chat, if you're listening and you want to, send us a topic in to discuss, much like we've just, discussed friends, send us an email at lads and on pod at gmail.com. So that's one word, lads. Anon pod at gmail.com. And also, if you could do us a great big favor, like, this is a modern day digital gesture.

00:41:35:07 – 00:42:02:11
Like you would hold a door open for someone. It cost you nothing. It means everything to us. So can you give us a follow on our social, platforms Twitter, Instagram and TikTok? And the handle is lads and on pod exactly the same as email. Very simple lads. And on pod. And if you see any of our posts, give us a like a comment.

00:42:02:14 – 00:42:29:20
Engage with it. Don't leave us without the experience, you know, don't make us look like dickheads. We're going to quickly go over through some other questions and topics, some of the questions that you've sent in, which are I was going to say drum roll, but there is no drum roll. So, is it acceptable for friends that they each other's exes, can friends pay compliments to the attractiveness of your wife, girlfriend or fella?

00:42:29:22 – 00:42:41:00
Okay, should friends always be brutally honest? Even if someone might get hurt, right. We're going to go to a quick ad and we'll be back for part two.

00:42:41:00 – 00:43:17:06
Right. Have you had those questions beforehand? Let's go through the first one. Is it acceptable for friends to date each other's exes? In my experience, no, no, no, because I'm coming from London and the pool of fish is greater than that in other areas, like where I live now, which is a small town in the West Country. There's only so much, so many men and women, certainly a certain age.

00:43:17:06 – 00:43:42:03
So there is naturally going to be this sort of incestuous nature to it all. But in London, I wouldn't, I wouldn't accept, I wouldn't write, I wouldn't write it. No, I wouldn't like you being in a previous context. I don't know, actually meet you. I wouldn't mind because you're a nice guy. But if some of my mates and I just think, boy, what do you think?

00:43:42:05 – 00:44:12:00
Well, Well, first of all, why would you not mind me? Is it because you don't see that I'm a threat? Or that I'm a good lover? Because I am now. I'll put the time. I never heard a word. I've heard of other things I've heard everywhere. Where I sit on it is, I remember I've got to be really fucking careful not to mention names and not to give too much kind of around the story, but, someone I know dated, someone, for a couple of years.

00:44:12:06 – 00:44:37:08
They broke up, then that person's mate started dating that person, and, for a couple of years, too. But every time the circle of friends, met up, there's never this awkwardness or anything because everyone was. No, there wasn't. Everyone was adults about it. Yeah, but inside, internally in me, I was I could not be fucking happy that it depends like you're an emotion.

00:44:37:11 – 00:45:01:08
You break it. Do you're breaking bread and having a pint with some geezer that's just giving your, your current missus some, some long strikes. Yeah. But you'll as I've got older, you've have to write because there were kids. I don't know how I had. But if you broke, if you broke up with your Mrs. Right and you met a new woman, naturally you were going to see each other because your kids are involved.

00:45:01:10 – 00:45:25:09
You are going to. So you have to be an adult about it. You have to accept that this is for for the sake of your sanity and for the kids that you're going to be, you'll be confronted with someone who used to poke you Mrs.. Or is poking you Mrs.. You just have to be right so but but but but but as a kid as young as I younger growing up you if you had an emotional connection with that person is difficult.

00:45:25:10 – 00:45:49:13
It would be difficult. But as so many relationships break down now, luckily you've been with your overall for so long, for so many, many years. It's different. But for the vast majority of people, when you're breaking up, you're breaking up, your your parents are getting divorced or whatever it might be confronting someone who used to be your partner, you know, it is now with someone else's.

00:45:49:15 – 00:45:58:02
It's difficult. But in a friendship group, you might want to look at whether or not it's going to have a massive impact on your on your friendship.

00:45:58:04 – 00:46:18:20
If you want to, start a relationship with someone. But that person used to. But I think generally as a rule of thumb, like I would never in any I would never like when like with your Mrs.. Yeah. Like we were friends. I would consider her a friend. Yeah. At no point in any world did I ever look around for.

00:46:18:20 – 00:46:48:03
Yeah. One fancy parent. Because. Because she was yours, Rick. Right. And they never did that. It's almost like my brothers wives and they like, I never look at them in any way. Because your brain, your subconscious mind does at least says no, that's the I it never it never enters my brain and it never has. It never has a guarantee that actually leads onto the second question quite nicely.

00:46:48:08 – 00:47:17:02
Can friends pay compliments to the attractiveness of someone's wife girlfriend, fella, whoever it makes, be true friends and you can. Yeah. You reckon you can? Yeah. If you said my wife Olive was she's a fit or attractive, I would have no issue with her. I think you said something about your insecurity. If you. If you don't. No, no, I but she was if you said a bit if you said fit, that's a that's different.

00:47:17:02 – 00:47:42:14
If you said your wife beautiful all these beautiful. Yeah. Yeah. Exactly. That's fine because. Because then in my mind in. Yeah. I'd love to smash your wife. That's different. That's what's going on in my head. Like if someone says, oh, you like it, they're pretty beautiful. Okay, that's that's cool. But if someone says, like, are your wife's welfare or like, or your punching mate, you know that they're thinking, I'd love to, I'd love to have go.

00:47:42:15 – 00:48:00:04
Yeah, but they're not your friends. I don't think your friends my I would never say that to Eric. I would never say that to you and people that do send it to you. It's like, what is what is what are you doing? Firstly, would your friends want to break you down in that way? Oh, you're punching, so you're digging me out and you're saying you're fantasizing about my missus.

00:48:00:06 – 00:48:28:17
That's what's happening. Yeah. I've like you none of your mate, none of our mates in our circle in terms of, you know, fighting. No, I could I'd be surprised if any one of them would, would say anything like that. Yeah. That is, I think you're right in the context and the words that you're saying, because I, I listened to, Theo Von's pod the other day, and he was saying, oh, I met your friend, the comedian.

00:48:28:19 – 00:48:48:22
And I met his wife, and she was she was a pretty tough thing. Hey. And I just thought it just sounded a bit right. But they're not friends, are they? They're doing a podcast through chat. I know, but it just sounds weird. And, yeah, I think I would, because it just sounded a bit like, not perving on, and I.

00:48:48:24 – 00:49:09:21
Yeah. So that's what's happening in my wife. I see my wife. I know she's saying you can't you must acknowledge that that men look at women and they and it's not that it's the nature of it or it's not the natural order of things that men look at. When, of course, are they, a filthy pig? I am a filthy pig.

00:49:09:23 – 00:49:27:09
You know what I think that about? Women are not married. They're not in relationships. But yeah, I know that's true, but I wouldn't say it out loud to to their main term. Oh, yeah, I'd I'd keep that. I'd keep that shit to myself. That's not. I wouldn't even share that with mates. And then I'm going to go on to the last question.

00:49:27:09 – 00:49:38:04
Good. Which is should friends always be brutally honest, even if it may hurt the other person? No.

00:49:38:06 – 00:50:05:20
Well, I we can agree on that one. Yeah. Why did you set? Well, even if, you know, it's going to be really hurtful, but it's going to be beneficial in the long run, would you say, or would you be like, yeah, no, I would gauge my, response or my way of dealing it the based on your if it was you your, how I think you might take it and give you the information in a way that I think would be one that that you would be able to cope with.

00:50:05:22 – 00:50:27:04
But just ripping the bandaid off isn't always the best course of action, is it? Sometimes you have to know. You have to add some sort of warm water to the bandaid and gently pull it off. Yeah, how do I avoid Ricky screaming and crying sometimes? Yeah, I have a bit of soapy water too. It might help. Yeah. No, you you honest, blunt honesty is bullshit.

00:50:27:06 – 00:50:50:13
It's an absolute bullshit, you know? Totally. You got these people and then. And it's it's typically people of, of a somewhat limited intelligence. And I don't give a shit if that's offensive. Like your, your your thick if you think it's okay to say anything you like just because you're being honest. Sorry. I'm just being honest. That person might go sick.

00:50:50:13 – 00:51:13:00
Look at the state of their face. It's disgusting. Sorry. I'm just being honest. I honestly want to run you over. Yeah, that's exactly what I was going to say. I like, when you're at work in work meetings and they, And they go off on one, and I'm just being honest. I'm just like, there is a time to be, to be honest.

00:51:13:00 – 00:51:35:13
And there is a way to say things to people or to bring, information, ideas or whatever across an even if it's to me and you know, that a mate is key in or they're doing whatever it is, you wouldn't just come across in better. Oh, by the way, I saw, what's his name, fucking some other bird or some other geezer.

00:51:35:15 – 00:51:55:16
Like you'd be like, is everything okay? Like, have you noticed any. You know, I don't know, a case in point, it would be that, you know, that shits and gigs put yesterday on, chunks and Philly, and I don't know if it was a bit that they made up, but he, he went on that podcast and told his friend that he knows that his friends cheat, his girlfriend's cheating on him.

00:51:55:18 – 00:52:13:22
Live on a podcast. Yes. Is that because I feel so he I don't know, they went on a pod this this their relationship is one that is on camera all the time and he's gone. They've gone on another podcast and says, by the way, can I tell you something? This is to his friend. I know I've had it from two sources that your girlfriends cheat on.

00:52:13:22 – 00:52:31:16
You live on a podcast on one of the biggest podcasts in the UK. What is that? What is that? Is, I would never, ever, ever dream of not even doing it to you. I wouldn't do it to another human being I didn't even know or like I wouldn't do that. It was. It was weird. Check it out.

00:52:31:16 – 00:52:53:18
And it has to. Yeah, it has to be a bit weird. It has to be a bit to get the, to gain the system, get more likes because that is that friendship then is it? If then let's say you do it. But is that friendship? That's not something. Oh no, it's gone by behavior. I think it is right.

00:52:53:20 – 00:53:12:14
I'm going to wrap this up. So if you listen, if you still listen to lots anonymous. Thank you very much indeed. Hugely appreciate it. If you want to give us more feedback or anything, let us know on our email and through our social channels. But most of all, back are oh dear, I don't want to buy a feedback.

00:53:12:15 – 00:53:26:21
I don't want you then going to me. Love. There's been some feedback on the podcast. Shove it, I'll be Ross's. I don't want to read it. I don't like it. I don't want to it. I will take it. I will drink in, I will hold it close to me. But I reckon I'll be able to tell. Well.

00:53:26:21 – 00:53:44:01
Right. Ricky, if you had some feedback, you think if you, if you've been reading feedback, is that why you've what have you, what's different about you? You've been reading feedback haven't you. Sprightly today. What if. What what are you doing? Oh I need that feedback. I want that feedback. That's good. Don't give me the bad feedback. I want to see that right.

00:53:44:03 – 00:54:17:12
Okay. No fee, no bad feedback for you. But can you please subscribe on Apple Podcasts? Can you follow on Spotify wherever it is that you get your posts? If you are kind enough in your heart to give us a five star rating, to leave a good review to follow it, all the good stuff so that we can, it's a little lovely community of our circle of trust of let's anonymous so huge to to to that reviewing and and rating is massively important especially for a new podcast.

00:54:17:12 – 00:54:38:18
So if you if you enjoyed this in any way or you like fine CoC, then please, please like leave leave a review and write it in wherever you get your podcasts. It just give us more exposure already. Yeah. Just help us. Just just be nice to be kind. Just. Just do that for us. And until then, we will see you next week.

00:54:38:20 – 00:54:42:02
Re lovely.