#104 | Marriage | Is It Worth All That Money?

00:00:01:03 – 00:00:25:09
I think I'm giving up Tik Tok, Rick. I am, I am, I'm. I've deleted it. Really? Do you know what happened is I moved over to Instagram Reels because I was in the mood for some dark shit. And, I mean, sometimes, just like most crocodiles eat in people in that. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I mean, you know, I mean build fans little dabble in every now and then, you know, I mean some just horrendous, gory stuff that stays with you for the rest of your life.

00:00:25:11 – 00:00:47:11
Yeah. So I fancied a bit of that. So I went over to, you know, those images you just cannot forget. Yeah. I've got quite a few. Yeah. I need to tell me about those actually. And the sounds and that. So yeah, they sort of are horror and not just for like and I think like also like Instagram is like it allows you to choose what you want to see.

00:00:47:11 – 00:01:14:14
It's not you know, it's not really censored. It's and then so I haven't been using TikTok and I went back to TikTok and it's just full of twats. Yeah. I don't mean it really is. It's just full of people trying to gain attention, doing horrible things, being horrible to each other. And I just for I don't feel good.

00:01:14:16 – 00:01:39:05
I realized I didn't feel good, when I'm on Instagram, if everything feels like it's stuff from far away, whereas Tik Tok feels like it's on your doorstep, does that make any sense? Yeah it does. Yeah yeah yeah. So yeah, I didn't Tik Tok, it was more real because it could because waves I think real was more like most of them are more polished and Tik Tok is more people filming, like straight on their phone on Tik Tok.

00:01:39:05 – 00:02:05:18
It's that it's like it feels like quite authentic and raw and just like people just being, like you said, mean of horrible and fights and just weird stuff. Yeah. And and just didn't you just realize that, you lose faith basically in humanity. So I just I decided to watch it. There was so, you know, I remember so many people who listen to this will know.

00:02:05:18 – 00:02:23:18
But Diogo Jota passed away in a car accident a couple of weeks ago. Yeah, there was a Liverpool fan on there. And you know what would make me feel better? If he sent me a Galaxy when and he was talking about Diogo Jota, added him in the background. And naturally there has been a huge pile on on to this guy.

00:02:23:20 – 00:02:50:07
Yeah. Rightly so. Yeah. Of course. And I just, I just thought, what am I doing? I'm sitting on the sofa, I'm watching telly, I've got this going and I'm letting this rot into my brain. Yeah. So I just went back to find sort of shocked seeing people instead on Instagram. It's sharks. Eating people is more wholesome than some creature.

00:02:50:09 – 00:03:09:06
Yeah, I don't know. I feel like I brought an Irish. I had to I had to get rid of it. So have you completely deleted it off your phone now? Yeah. Good. That's good. I don't use it. I don't use it as a tool. What? I just I've just got rid of it. I don't what what's the point?

00:03:09:06 – 00:03:31:00
I mean, if it makes you feel. Then there was one state that you were, deep in the TikTok trenches. I think it's because I've spent time in it with Instagram, and it just feels better. And it doesn't emotionally impact me and you know, I did have to reset my reels the other day. You know, you can do a factory reset so the algorithm is cleared.

00:03:31:02 – 00:03:51:08
Yeah, yeah, yeah, I did that. And then I saw like and stuff like how to build about how to dig a trench if you're stuck in, if you're stuck in the, Antarctica. How do you survive. Yeah. Okay. See, I love all of that stuff. It's helpful. Yeah. It's only a matter of time before the some of the other stuff sort of creeps in again, but,

00:03:51:10 – 00:04:14:19
Yeah, I don't know, the the outgoing. The outgoing knows what you like. Why did you have to reset it to begin with? Was there just too many shark attacks and bad stuff happening? Yeah, there was too much. There was starting to get and a lot of racism, but too much racism, like I and I can't, I don't know, like, is the algorithm reflection of your subconscious because your instinct because the algorithm does.

00:04:14:21 – 00:04:34:14
Is it notices changes in your behavior as you're using the app. Yeah. And then when like the racism came, maybe I stayed around a little bit too long. Yeah. Not long enough for me to notice, but for my racist subconscious to reveal itself. Do you think you liked too many racist videos? I don't think you even need to.

00:04:34:19 – 00:04:58:04
I think I don't think you need to like the video. You just need to linger on the video a little bit longer than others. That's right. It doesn't mean you're into it. It just means, that's shocking or whatever it might be. You have a weird curiosity to it. So, like, when I go on Twitter and my For You tab, it is just vile racism, like right wing stuff.

00:04:58:04 – 00:05:18:12
And I'm just I'm that's because I see something posted and I'm like, let me have a look in the comments. Let's just right. Okay, I knew that. I knew that's what people are going to be saying. And then you just can't help that horrible scrolling through, just thinking, God, like, how is this allowed to happen? And why are people like this?

00:05:18:12 – 00:05:45:13
And why are people saying shit? Yeah. I don't know. So, that's where I'm at. So I've reset my Instagram algorithm and, deleted TikTok and I think I feel better. I wasn't till I watched Olivia Atwood's TV show last night that made me feel worse. And TikTok. So she's got a TV show, she. Yeah. And it's all about,

00:05:45:15 – 00:06:12:15
You know what she is? She's a fucking moron, Ricky. She's. Oh, she's just all about how she looks and how how you look and what how you other people perceive you to be that that's all important. Just what you look like, because there is nothing going on inside her head worth listening to you. She's a face. She's tits and she's ass and she's made herself like that, right?

00:06:12:15 – 00:06:38:05
And then she wants everybody else to see that. That is what is valuable in a human being. Yeah. And she's perpetuating this idiot to kids who listen to her. And I think she's a cunt. That is. That's that strong. Is that fair? That's fair. I could go stronger. That's how far I can. I appreciate people don't want to sit in their cars.

00:06:38:05 – 00:07:04:18
Listen to the C bomb being dropped. But when cretinous individuals like this exist, and the negative impact that people like her have on young people, but moreover, not even moreover, but as well as grown men and women as well. Like you should see how she's talking to, her husband. There's a clip of her going, well, I don't have a belly, so I don't think you should either.

00:07:04:20 – 00:07:28:22
That's what we've grown up in. You're like. You're you're saying this your husband on TV that's going to be watched by millions of people. You're humiliating him for what? And then. And then they got this guy. She's got this guy in. Right? And he used to be ripped when he was a kid, and he's met his girlfriend, and his girlfriend just got, like, he's just put on weight, like I have, I have I'm not in the same shape I was when I met Ollie.

00:07:28:22 – 00:07:43:13
But when, you know, you get to a point where you're just like, she ain't going anywhere. I can get fat, I can drink my beer, I can eat that cake.

00:07:43:15 – 00:08:11:05
So. So, so I let myself go a little bit, right? Rick? This bloke, it was ripped, ripped, ripped. And then she's met. She's having this interview with this, this, this lad, and he's put on weight. He looks like a normal dad bod lining up like mean. You, right? Compared to what he was. And he's. And he's gone in to have massive liposuction all over his body to suck out all of the fat.

00:08:11:07 – 00:08:33:22
And you should see the procedure. And it's like. And she's just looking at it kindly with glee, like, this is the best thing I've ever seen. And you're like, this isn't the best thing you ever seen. Look what the fuck he's putting himself through because society says he's not good enough and he's got his wife saying to him, I want the one, the body that I met, and she's saying, oh, mate, I it was terrible.

00:08:33:22 – 00:08:57:14
Like the fact it was the only saving grace is it was on at 1030 at night. That's the only saving grace hate. So fat man. Yeah. Like, talking about that, but I obviously it's been hot here in the UK, and I generally just walking around in shorts. We have a massive full length mirror at the bottom of our stairs.

00:08:57:16 – 00:09:14:02
And as my missus came home yesterday, I trotted down the stairs and as I was trotting down the stairs, I looked up into the mirror and you could just see your whole body wobbling. I looked and I just stood at the bottom. I looked at myself as I got this. This is this. What I've got is a bit.

00:09:14:02 – 00:09:35:05
Yeah, I mean, break in it's mad is how as men that it sticks with us all the time. Yeah like that idea that this is I don't think Matt perhaps that I don't know, maybe I'm mistaken, that people out there realize how conscious men are about themselves. It isn't just, a women thing. That body confidence is massive.

00:09:35:07 – 00:10:03:11
Oh, totally. And obviously the, you know, the the age of social media and Olivia Atwood fucking TV that you will feel that even more and like, I know that I've got a dad bod, I know that I'm overweight and I know all these things, and I know the key in which I can lose weight and make myself a bit happier within myself.

00:10:03:13 – 00:10:25:14
When I do it, when I fuck, I think I should get down the gym. I should have some whinging about it and get down the gym. But, if I'm not doing it, do it. I'm busy as well. So busy. So busy a lot. I've got podcasts. There's so much happening around Spurs at the moment. I've got podcasts coming out.

00:10:25:15 – 00:10:47:13
My fucking ears. You have got podcasts coming out. There is too many books, but you know, you got you got you gotta look after yourself. They, you know, getting. I mean, I don't even like for the gym stuff like the gym is so far away from me. Not as in locality, but what's your key if you gym over it?

00:10:47:16 – 00:11:07:03
I mean, healthy eating, for starters. It's like, oh, mate, like, I could go, like, right, tonight I'm going to have a steak like the protein and I'm going to have salad, a good salad, salad dressing. And I'll be all right. I'm then it gets to 3:00 and I'm like, I've got salad, salad for dinner waiting for me downstairs.

00:11:07:05 – 00:11:25:15
That is fucking shit. I've been doing this worst. SAT in this fucking box room, boiling hot on my laptop, coming. I do not want to go downstairs and tucking to a salad, you know. I mean, you got steak as well. Shut up is good. Yeah, that that bit is good, but it's not going to fill me up. Where's the potato.

00:11:25:16 – 00:11:52:08
Where's also the good stuff? The high Ricky. You know the Ricky I loved most. Yeah. It was so it. The, Is it when the, during my big bloated era, the, and the the, the, you know, one of the most worst photos that I've ever seen of myself. So you know what I'm going to say?

00:11:52:08 – 00:12:09:16
That. You know that photo? I have that photo. My. And someone, had put the words on that was it, two pumps, two children or something like that. And, I think that was me.

00:12:09:18 – 00:12:29:12
And this girl, a picture of me. And I'm like, every time I see I'm, Yeah, it was this wasn't a little bit there. And you were just looking up to the camera. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Me, me in case. Love that photo. Yeah, I know you there, you fucking bastard. If he if we do have that photo, send it over to me.

00:12:29:12 – 00:12:49:07
And if I pluck up the courage, I'll post it, because everyone listening to this will, probably enjoy. I don't look like that anymore, but, you know, and I can take a take. It's fine. I'll post it. I posted that, the night the other day that I played the jingle button, and then, the, No, I hated that.

00:12:49:09 – 00:13:10:04
Why did you post? That made me feel so sick. But you told me to post it on the last part where you told me to send it to you. I want to say that. Okay? I don't remember even saying that. So I run the jingle. Let's do it on the night. I see, like, Band of Brothers playing tunes.

00:13:10:04 – 00:13:31:12
Hi. As quiet midnight waves. Surfing through till daylight breaks. Rhythm hit us different ways. Love of music I we prayed with our tongues in cheek band I we like to speak and yeah, times change. But no matter what the bond remains. Brothers.

00:13:31:14 – 00:13:56:24
Hello and welcome to lads anonymous is episode 104. I'm Ricky, he's five two best mates. One main topic we answer your life dilemmas and confessions in our feature. Something only you know. And everything remains anonymous always. So sit back, relax and enjoy the podcast. How's it going, Flav? Just text. I can imagine the, The heat. Yes. Is, is tough.

00:13:57:01 – 00:14:20:16
I've spent my last just sweating, just sitting on the sofa in bars and sweat back of my head as well. But but may I, I, I honestly, I my heart sinks when the heat wave coming. I just feel so uncomfortable. I hate him, I hate it for you. 31 degrees to me is mayhem. And I've got guys in London.

00:14:20:16 – 00:14:46:01
It's 34. Apparently today may have just might have at night. What are you, What you saying when you go to sleep? Go big fat. Got a big fan on this day. On all night? Yeah, course. What do you want? Oh, no, you're not. You're not money. You're not penny pinching the fan at night, I. Yeah. No no no, it's not that not penny pinching far right.

00:14:46:03 – 00:15:06:09
We have a fans cool down. But when we go to sleep during sleep. No fan because I wake up and I feel hungry, like my eyes are dried out. I'm really nasally. I just feel a bit grim. So the window is wide open. But I've been sleeping on top of the covers. Yeah, yeah. And just in my boxer shorts.

00:15:06:09 – 00:15:25:18
Yeah. My niece's like she's got a, like a, like a little vest top on. She's wearing jogging bottoms. Yeah. Not just at the bottom of the covers as well. And then guys. Oh that's radio. I'm not a fucking wonder why. So you go fuck talking bottoms on. Yeah. Get him off. Get off. And that's. Oh boy. Get naked.

00:15:25:20 – 00:15:46:14
Yeah. Holly's the same. She wears. She wears, pajamas. Pajamas are part of the best pajamas ever. Diary. May I seen them? Yeah. They are. I love she wears them all the time. Like when they get famous to Topshop. It really? It might be on Facebook. You know, sometimes you don't have to face, but it might be one of them.

00:15:46:14 – 00:16:07:03
Yeah. I'm usually you do it and you like this. Anything can turn up and literally anything that's like there could be something that is nothing like what you've bought. Yeah. But, you know, these were really good. The ones with the shark drawings on with the great white shark from jaws. Yeah. Mate, they are very smart pajamas.

00:16:07:03 – 00:16:27:15
Love them. Yeah. But she. Yeah, yeah, I've been just having fun on, with the dog as well. He needs the fan. Just like it just freaks out. So it's moving around. Can't settle. But with the fan on the feels, he just settles down. But does he sleep in your room? Yeah. Seems a less. Does he? Yeah. No.

00:16:27:15 – 00:16:46:05
Thank you, thank you. Yeah. Like I love it. I'll put my foot on it. Oh it's a my sleeping position is, we've got a couple of right trend winner. Always a one leg out of the. So out of the, you know, talking about. Yeah, I don't know. We don't I put leave one leg out. No. What is it?

00:16:46:05 – 00:17:10:01
The regulator just keeps your body. Yeah. Yeah. What? All the rest of it. But one leg out the quilt on top of it. That's the regulator. Yeah. And the, What is it that works? So fucking. Wait a minute. You just like, you've got a nice balance between. And, And then. But but I'll have the regulator out, and then I've.

00:17:10:03 – 00:17:35:18
And I'll, I'll then put my foot between on Frank's chest and these arms on and up and, on both my, on my leg and I just that's, It's all right. Yeah. Yeah, he's fine with that. Yeah. Oh, bless him, little, but he loves that little fat pig. Do you, do you normally if you see him, stuff that you think your Mrs. would like, do you just normally just go.

00:17:35:18 – 00:17:56:19
Right. I think she'll like that. I'll buy it for her. Are you like, you know, write stuff down. I'm thinking birthday Christmas. Oh, yeah. No, I don't want those, I think, but I generally get things wrong. That's the thing. I'll buy it. And she doesn't like it. So I don't tend to. But I knew that she would wear she would wear these pajamas because I like that.

00:17:56:19 – 00:18:16:23
I like the fact that they were drawers themed. So even if she doesn't like them, she'll still wear them. That's I think this is this is a stage you get to in your relationship where you like I instead of buying a lingerie, I'm buying the drawers. Pajamas. Because that's what I want to see her wearing.

00:18:17:00 – 00:18:48:01
Mate, let's call it a. We have got an email from last week talking about hangovers that I just wanted to read out. Yeah. The full. And just before we jump into today's topic. So I'm going to go through that now. So this is a story about someone being hung over back in 2007. And it somehow ended up as a metropolitan police officer in brackets, even though I still love clubbing and a cheeky.

00:18:48:03 – 00:19:07:19
Just for just for the video sake. That's because. Don't want to say that. Well, I mean, he's he used to be a metropolitan police officer, so I'd imagine that, dropping. What did you do? Don't say it. But what? Describe what you did. Why are you doing that? You know why. Why? You know, I'm going to carry on.

00:19:07:19 – 00:19:28:15
Because I'm not going to say it anyway. And getting annual leave was a total pain in the ass. My best friends were getting married on a Thursday, and neither myself or my wife could get the Friday off work, so I had to make sure I was in for my 10 a.m. shift the day after the wedding. Planning to pace ourselves and take easy.

00:19:28:15 – 00:19:51:15
We both proceeded to get absolutely battered and have the best night on the dancefloor. When my alarm went off at 6 a.m. Friday morning, I woke up in a tiny, airless, bright white hotel with a brain like a razor. We tried to get some breakfast down as my wife looked at a greasy fried egg and put it on her, that I'd put on a plate for her and immediately ran off to vomit.

00:19:51:17 – 00:20:14:21
Then I had to get in the car and drive back to London. I dropped my wife off at work and the security guard walked over and said to us, you've done really well getting in today. South London's in total lockdown. What happened? I said as an angry monkey banged bin bin laden against the side of my skull. There's been a terror attack at Parsons green tube.

00:20:14:23 – 00:20:38:22
Fuck. The moment I got into work, a gammon face sergeant roared at me to get fucking kitted up and get down to Putney. I bundled into the locker room, threw my uniform on, and then thrust into a meet. Back in before I had so much as a coffee or a pre-work shit. I spent the next 13 hours stood outside Putney train station telling people that the train station was closed due to an incident.

00:20:39:02 – 00:21:00:07
And no, I didn't know when it would open. And no, I didn't know how I was going to get home either. All I needed was fluid food, a chair ready access to a toilet. I'd have no one looking at me or talking to me. I had none of those things. Oh, the next 15 hours. Worst hangover ever. That is grim.

00:21:00:09 – 00:21:26:22
Yeah, that is grim. Like if you go on a big one, at least you can hide in your bedroom and no one talked to you and just browse social media rooms. Yeah, that's horrendous. Do you know who said that in that? That's plastic pig. Yeah, I, I did, I did suspicions this is plastic people watch this. The drugs in front of women didn't arrest us.

00:21:26:24 – 00:21:57:24
Yeah. It's a good man's a good man. He's a legend. Can you imagine? I like being that hung over and not like being that hung over. And you know, when your brain is fucked and you going into an office and getting on with a hangover, it's hard enough. But then there's a terror attack and you've got to go to the tell you that tube station and money fuck in the control of the crowd should have you sent down into the fucking into the into the clean up or go, oh God.

00:21:58:01 – 00:22:21:04
No. You know, she lucked out very that a fucking grim ratio. And that's coming off. Yeah. Gone. We found the image. Good. What do you mean? We found the image of you. Sent a message to the group chat to find it. You fucking pig. Okay, Has it. I said to him, have you got our favorite picture of Ricky Sahad?

00:22:21:06 – 00:22:27:10
And he said, always. It's.

00:22:27:12 – 00:22:48:22
Blood. Yeah, I will paste they. I will paste it in there so much. Yeah. It's like, thank God, thank God is when you desperately holding onto your hair as well at the same time. Yeah, yeah. God, I don't even want to look at the fly it. To be honest, it's, It's grim. Do you know what the, topic for today's hangovers?

00:22:48:24 – 00:23:18:02
No, we did this last week. What was it? What is it? Marriage. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Getting married. Getting married? Were you a guy that wanted to get married? Like, we're both from parents who divorced when we were younger? Yeah. Did any of that have any, like, psychological effect on us to say marriage is a waste of time. I don't want to get married.

00:23:18:02 – 00:23:38:08
It's blah blah, blah. Did you like, how were you in your teens, in your early 20? Thinking about marriage? Yeah, I, I think my dad used to sort of. He was his position was marriage was a waste of time. And but he was coming from a marriage that was broken. Right. So he was sort of damaged by it.

00:23:38:08 – 00:23:58:14
You got married pretty young in that really early 20s, had two kids, and then the relationship broke down. And I think that was his version of it. And, so I kind of I never really used to listen to him in that respect. I didn't think like, I was aware that he came from a marriage that didn't work.

00:23:58:14 – 00:24:23:22
So it didn't impact me. And then I kind of my first were serious relationship. It was just so we met so young at 18. And he kind of felt like it's sort of 25, 26 at perhaps we should get married, but for the sake of it rather than really me, I didn't actually want to in that relationship, I didn't want, I didn't see the point, I didn't.

00:24:23:22 – 00:24:56:23
Yeah, yeah, yeah. When I get married. But then when obviously I met my wife, it was completely different because you're older and it's new and you've learned so much about yourself and what a relationship means and what makes you happy that, that that, it felt like the right thing to do tonight. Yeah. I mean, when when I was younger, my parents divorced when I was five, maybe 5 or 6.

00:24:57:00 – 00:25:21:21
And, I think my probably earliest memories were of my parents arguing and like, the kind of, a volatile atmosphere of shouting and screaming and stuff like that. My, my other earliest memory was when we moved into our new home, and I remember it thinking of paint because they had just redecorated in the house. I didn't really like it.

00:25:21:21 – 00:25:38:01
And it was that sit down talk with my mum. You know that me and your dad have split up, and this is where we're going to be leaving me and your sister, and you see you that at weekends and feeling really like, oh, fuck, I don't like the marriages. It is done and we're not going to be together as a family unit.

00:25:38:01 – 00:25:58:07
And then I remember my mum saying, you know, your, you know, your friend from playschool. So this is, one of The Goonies. I was like, yeah. And she said he, he lives three doors away. I was like, I was like, what? She's like, you know, your best friend at pace Group and playgroup. He lives three doors away in our new house.

00:25:58:09 – 00:26:29:01
I was like, can I go out and look for him? She's like, it's 10:00 at night. I'm fine. All right, fine. But that was my earliest memories of like, marriage break up and it not being that great. But when I was growing up, when I was young, and I don't I don't know if men really chat about, like, their life kind of aspirations of I want to get married and I want to do this and well, but marriage was never in my mind.

00:26:29:01 – 00:27:01:16
It was never a thing. I want to be that guy in Top Hat and tails and the, you know, the white wedding and church and all of that stuff. At that time, I do remember in my later teens of being I want children, I want three boys and two girls, and that was kind of it, really. And so marriage wasn't really a thing that I particularly longed for.

00:27:01:18 – 00:27:29:07
It wasn't anything that I would, I don't know, fantasize about or felt like it was ever going to come into my life. Like obviously you said about your your first relationship and then you met Ollie. Yeah, we like when you first met her and stuff. And obviously you had the, you know, the honeymoon period. Everything's great. And I remember as well you trying to scuttle off to fucking the West Country every minute that you had.

00:27:29:09 – 00:27:49:14
And then I knew I was, I, he seemed pretty serious about this. And he seems like really kind of like, loved up. And at that point, were you did you think about marriage? I did, I did romantically I think think about marriage really early on. Yeah. Yeah, I think I did. I never mentioned I used to joke.

00:27:49:14 – 00:28:16:24
So I want to marry you one day, you know, that you, you know, and I told her that I loved, before she told me a, Well, yeah. And I was, I was taking a lot of drugs back, and, so I was really in touch with my emotions. Especially on a Tuesday. And, and, so.

00:28:17:01 – 00:28:38:05
Yeah, so I did I definitely I definitely kind of more open to it straight away. And the idea of being a husband and calling my wife is I love calling her my wife. I always call her my wife. Now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that felt really natural very quickly. And so I it's weird didn't it? Because it's weird.

00:28:38:05 – 00:29:02:18
It's a weird thing to get married, like it's some sort of the standard in tradition. It's that steeped in tradition in the UK, in steeped in tradition in the UK. And obviously it had massive religious connotations once in a while, but most people now don't even we didn't have a vicar. We had someone who was registered to or enabled to.

00:29:02:20 – 00:29:21:11
I don't remember what the name is ordained. I think it is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So we had that and we had our own, vows and there was nothing religious about it. Oh, we had to go through the formality of going to a registry office the day before, and we did that in front of a family, which lovely as well.

00:29:21:13 – 00:29:49:09
Yeah. But, but the the actual traditional religious element is gone completely. And, even before that, there was a kind of pagan istic way of doing it with houses a little bit more pagan. We had like a and we had our hand bindings and all that stuff, all that stuff. Only when it, so it's weird that there is still this kind of binding in, between two people and why it's so important in this modern era.

00:29:49:09 – 00:30:22:15
It still happens. And, you know, there's reports and studies that suggest that married couples who stay together in happy relationships live longer and all this kind of stuff, but yeah, it just felt right. But you were in a situation where you've not actually ever done that. No. So I, obviously I'm not I'm not married. And when you say no, I, I do depending on who I'm talking, talking to, but I do often refer to Donna as my wife.

00:30:22:17 – 00:30:39:20
I feel like a bit of a cop out because she's not actually my wife, but I'm 42 years old and not going to call it my fiancee or my girlfriend or anything like that. So it's just easier to say that. But I would like I would like it if I said my wife and she actually was officially my wife.

00:30:39:22 – 00:31:05:23
What? What's stopping you? Mate, there's loads of stuff, man. You. Should we get into it? Well, fucking. Yeah, just fucking get into it. What's stopping you from marrying the the one of the greatest women I've ever met? Yeah. Okay. So when you were before, when you got married, right? The you obviously proposed to your wife. She said yes.

00:31:06:00 – 00:31:39:08
Then they will start moving of then you. Yeah. Close. Yeah. Is there a thing? Deena's. You know, all of that stuff, all of that. And instead of he starts to gather pace. Yeah. What input did you have into that? Were you, were you minimal? In the same way that what input do you think I'm having with how our house looks.

00:31:39:10 – 00:32:02:17
Right. What do you think my input is to the way the house looks? What do you think that might be, Rick? How much is that going to cost? Yes. Okay. And then. Okay, here's some money. Yeah. Yeah. Do I get to say what kind of Paralympian? Yeah. Do you think? Okay. Actually, what she's done recently is friend or under the bus here.

00:32:02:19 – 00:32:24:09
Oh, I'll be like, I've managed to get one win in that house. One win. And that is the I've. She wanted a like lantern skylight in the kitchen. Right. But I just I don't like them. For the source clean. Just flat like that kind of goes into the roof and you can't really see it, and it just, that's what I like.

00:32:24:09 – 00:32:40:23
But she like that. She let me have that one. That's the only thing I've had. And she quite likes them anyway, so it's not really not raining. I don't know, I don't know if I've won or not. This is the. And it's killing me, right? Because I thought I'd actually won one the other day when we had paneling.

00:32:40:23 – 00:33:02:03
We got these paneling. Basically, the house has been cut. What I thought was happening in terms of we would be able to move in and do a few bits, maybe get the windows replaced. Is ended up with us gutting the house completely, putting in new central heating, putting new, wiring in. It's all been new rewired. The kitchen is a different shape to the one we bought.

00:33:02:05 – 00:33:24:00
The is higher than it was. We put a new roof in, walls were falling down. It's been crazy fucking, that sounds man. Yeah. And I'm going through that stress as well, right. Oh, he's going through that stress. Yeah. So maybe I could just choose a panel. And a four at one I chose this panel. I was like yep, that's nice I like that.

00:33:24:00 – 00:33:45:01
And I was like, Ollie, what do you think? She yeah I feel like it. And I'm like, oh I do like yeah actually. Yeah. Yeah. So I'm going to tell the builder yes I do that am I. Yep. Two days later everything's changed. We're doing a completely different. She's changed her mind. We're doing it. And then I just think I'm sitting there.

00:33:45:04 – 00:34:05:20
I'm thinking, what are we doing here? What we're doing is building a house that she's proud of. That should be happy to have people around. I'm thinking what's important to me is it just having some fucking wood in a certain shape? Or is it her being as happy with this house as possible? Yeah, and that's the answer for me.

00:34:05:22 – 00:34:27:03
Yeah, exactly. I, I totally agree with you. I mean, I would be like, I have a preference for this, that and the other, but if it was the choice of miss, my missus being, Yeah. Okay. Well, you know, I won't be happy with it, but happy to kind of go with what I say just to kind of show that there's a bit of, you know, balance both.

00:34:27:05 – 00:34:45:23
Yeah, but if you know, it's an equal kind of thing. But at the end of the day, I don't give a fuck. Is there going to be a chair there kind of sitting in that? I'm happy. If you're happy, if you've got a smile on your face, I'm good, I'm good, yes, I need it. Be fucking like paisley pattern or this and that and the other.

00:34:46:02 – 00:35:23:24
If I don't have a preference. No red anywhere. Right. But apart from that, you fucking knock yourself out. I like, I fully like if there's something the bug. So that would bug me. So. Yeah. And so the to answer your question is how much input do you think I had in my with him. I mean I would that would there have been a conversation around should we use this tables and chair or this table and chair, not you doing the research, but you get option A or option B and you say either option B and then you'd say the actual answer was that option I.

00:35:24:01 – 00:35:52:20
Yeah yeah. No I, I would I was happy for it to take the lead so I didn't have to think about it. Yeah. So so she chose everything and I was unsure whether we needed two chandeliers in a tent, but apparently we did. And that it looked beautiful. It did look beautiful. It did look beautiful. So I kind of like, in a roundabout way, to answer your question, my Mrs. is virtually a carbon copy of you.

00:35:52:22 – 00:36:18:16
And if it's her that is traditionally the person to lead the line of organizing the wedding, where do you think we would get two? Not very far. The same place that I would. You wouldn't give me. Hey, that's why you're not married, isn't it? I mean, it's part of that. Part of that. And what it actually is, is the money needed.

00:36:18:18 – 00:36:43:17
I mean, I mean, the money side of it, right? I know, I know, people say you don't need x, y, z to get married. You can get married at a registry office. You can do this. You do that, I get it, I get it right. I really do. But it's money that I would be like, Rick, do you want to go to Disneyland with your family, or do you want to have this big party for everyone?

00:36:43:17 – 00:37:03:02
I'm like, I'd like to go to Disneyland with my kids at today, and then you move that on and it's like, okay, do you want to go to, you know, so on, so forth, every single time. If someone says, here's a wedding, well, here's something fun going to Thailand with your family or doing this, I'm going to pick the other thing.

00:37:03:02 – 00:37:29:10
It just isn't our priority. So that's kind of where we are. We also feel like, you know, one day we will get around to it. We definitely will. But it's just not high up on either of our agendas. Yeah. Then then then you making the right decision constantly. Like, what if you. All wedding was fantastic, right? We had a great time.

00:37:29:12 – 00:37:57:01
And all of you know, my friends were there and all these friends were there, and it was a brilliant day. But fuck me. Was it expensive in over. Well, we didn't do it day. We did a weekend. So that was we. We we didn't have to do that. So it's no point complaining about complaining about, you know, the fact that it was expensive when we've chosen to do it over three days, of course, it's going to be expensive.

00:37:57:03 – 00:38:15:04
But we just wanted everyone to come and not worry about it and not have to figure out how they get in. Taxis home on after the after the, after the the ceremony and the party. So what we did is we there was this farm close to us where you could hire out, and it had glamping tents.

00:38:15:06 – 00:38:32:23
And it also had some sort of little, like little hobbit houses. And there was a farmhouse and we just had the whole thing and of Treehouse, so that no one had to worry about getting home. Everyone could just stay and just get mashed up and have a great time or go to bed if they want to. And there's just the beds right there.

00:38:33:00 – 00:38:58:05
Yeah. And then the next day we'll go out and anyway, so we had it was extortionate, expensive, so much so that you would have had we spent so much on our wedding that we could have probably traveled around the world twice. It was obscene. But. And the problem is, in the run up to the wedding is what you pay for a certain amount.

00:38:58:05 – 00:39:30:01
And the average, what is the average? This was what? Well, what? Yeah, what? I will say it was a fantastic wedding. And the the kind of glamping that I was that me and my family were staying in was next to a big chicken coop. So in the morning, I could walk over to the chicken coop, wrap my own freshly laid eggs, and we had a hamper from when we arrived, you know, from the farm sausages.

00:39:30:01 – 00:39:47:16
Baker and you know, all the food. We had an Aga, you know. I mean, it was fucking. So we put all those Hamptons hampers together, all united. Oh, did you didn't come to the farm. You had to go out and buy all that and make those all up. What did you just think that was? Well, did you just knock on the phone?

00:39:47:18 – 00:39:59:17
Well, no, not from the farm, but I thought it was that part of the price, that, you know, I was on top of everything was on top. I got the second.

00:39:59:19 – 00:40:09:04
What is the average price of a wedding in the UK?

00:40:09:06 – 00:40:33:12
In 2025, the average cost of a wedding in the UK is about 25,625 pounds. That includes everything from the venue to catering and photography. It's definitely quite an investment. 26 grand, thereabouts is the average price of a wedding houses more than that? Yeah. And the thing is, is you budget it in the run up and you just think, how much is this going to cost?

00:40:33:14 – 00:40:57:00
Right. Well, we know weddings typically cost about 25 grand. We budget for that. And then in the end in the run up, you've so much has gone on that you've gone used to start throwing money. If you have it. And so we just say at this stage, whatever it costs, we'll just pay for it. And you get into this panic mode and you end up spending the money is flying out the account.

00:40:57:03 – 00:41:17:15
You know, you sit back afterwards and go, fuck me. How much did that cost? But, you know, we were in a situation where, you know, we've been given some money from parents and stuff like that, and we were able to do it, but we would have done it differently to some degree. If, you know, if money saving was was the priority.

00:41:17:19 – 00:41:44:24
Luckily enough, at that period we had a bit of money behind us, but it set us back in terms of buying a house by 2 or 3 years. Shit. But what we should have done, the sensible thing would have been all of that goes into a deposit for a house. Yeah, but you like your life. Once I was literally about to say that, and that was an incredible experience for us, and everybody else had seemed to have a great time.

00:41:45:01 – 00:42:06:14
And I'm like, I think I'd rather do that. It's like you do. Have you rather have experiences with your family? It's like the same principle. Yeah. I remember you saying afterwards and for weeks afterwards, even mum's just it's insane how buzzing you were about it. The best able life. Such a great day and it was a great day, you know, for everyone.

00:42:06:16 – 00:42:31:24
And that's what you're kind of paying for really, isn't it. And it's. And and at that it's priceless. What I did when I kind of, go back and chat to you about is the like before the, the wedding, the, and another thing that strikes the fear of God in me is stag days. And then there's the invites for the wedding.

00:42:32:01 – 00:42:50:17
And I know people. I don't know if you can't remember if you did it, you know, you have a daytime event. And then in the evening, people come in the evening. Yeah, I think that, you know what? I'm pretty sure that is a British thing where you have a daytime people and then you have an evening peak. Pretty, right?

00:42:50:19 – 00:43:10:20
I think most weddings around the world, America, Australia, you. If you're invited to the wedding, you're invited to the wedding. So you're there at the, you know, in the church all the way through. But in the UK we we have a kind of your nearest and dearest, the actual ceremony and mill. And then in the evening your work colleagues turn up and shit like that.

00:43:10:20 – 00:43:42:16
Yeah. And I was like, that's another thing that really puts me off, like my stag do, like I've got so many different groups of mates and who's going to come and where we're going to go, what we're going to get up to all of that stuff that just that pressure of, of the whole thing. Again, it just pushes me back and pushes me further away from actually doing the wedding and like, yeah, I don't have to have a stag day, but it kind of like if you're going through those steps, you.

00:43:42:18 – 00:44:01:02
I didn't have, you should have a stag day. I didn't have one, did I. No, I didn't we, I mean we, we needed well we had to. Yeah we, we went down to Newquay to go festival didn't we. But it was it was a storm that weekend. The whole festival was gonna get blown off the side of the mountain.

00:44:01:06 – 00:44:17:13
Oh, hell yeah. Face. So they didn't do it, but that I didn't want a stereotypical stag where I went off to Amsterdam having to dress up and shit. I was just a normal killjoy. I just fucking hate it. I don't see that someone pull out an Arsenal shirt and I have to wear that for a day. I don't find it funny.

00:44:17:13 – 00:44:42:01
I think it's stupid as it might. I would never do that. I would never wear an Arsenal shirt, ever. So I'm not going to do it for a laugh. From Spurs mates have given it to me. I wore I'm not not doing it okay. And I know it's like a killjoy and you're supposed to just get on with it, but just not like St James's Stag, where we went to Hamburg and he was wearing a lady house and nothing else right in, in Germany.

00:44:42:03 – 00:45:03:22
And it was gay pride, mate. I at one point I thought he was in danger. Like, yeah, the attention that he was getting, he had nothing on. And he's a, you know. Yeah. A handsome young man. He is. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was it came on top a little bit. Yeah. I can imagine that there'd be some, some thirsty, thirsty boys after him.

00:45:03:24 – 00:45:25:15
Yeah. Like again, stag day. And exactly what you were saying about I get there and it's like, oh, number one, it's like the activities. What activities? Oh, well, I don't like doing that. Do we have to go go karting? Oh. Do we, you know, all that stuff. And it's just like, I think what is, what's your perfect stag do if you had to choose.

00:45:25:17 – 00:45:58:17
So I think I've mentioned it before and in my mind at the moment I would like to go to the river Ebro in northern Spain and go cat fishing and you know. Yeah. And you know, these catfish that you can like watching someone trying to play a fish that is so, you know, they're like the Hulk, the power in playing a fish that strong and watching someone's face do it and being not fucking out.

00:45:58:17 – 00:46:15:14
I cannot believe I fit into this thing. It would be it. It would just bring me so much joy. Right? If you do get married. Exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I would be up for that, wouldn't I? I don't know if all of them would be, but it's like, that's the thing. It's like, oh come. But you guys can go fishing.

00:46:15:14 – 00:46:37:21
I'll stay here at the pool and then again that's fine. But it's like, do you want to go on a stag do with ten people? And then three people go fishing the rest of that? Fuck that. It's that. Well, it's just out here for a holiday then, you know? I mean, it's those those dynamics that I find a bit awkward and uncomfortable.

00:46:37:21 – 00:46:54:13
And in the end, I just feel like, you know, I'm just not going to do it anyway. Then it's the invites of who you bring along. The friendship barrier. You'd imagine. I think we've talked about this when we did Stag, we did the pod on stag. The stag these days ago, didn't we? But I think there is.

00:46:54:15 – 00:47:13:24
You have to get that dynamic quite right. Yeah. You're spending four days of people there. You're going to get on a people can get upset if you don't invite them along. So it's all a bit of a all a bit of yeah it is. And it's one of those ones of sort. They invited me to their stag day and that was three years ago.

00:47:14:01 – 00:47:38:00
Do I then have to return the favor because I went on their stag do? It's like one of those things I'd rather just sidestep. And then you get into the actual wedding day and you've got your list, and it's kind of like, I've invited this person, that person. They say, fuck, I've run out of seats. And then someone's saying, oh, am I not invited to the day?

00:47:38:02 – 00:47:57:05
Now you're invited to the evening. Oh, right. Yeah, you came to my day and it's just like a whole these conversations. You know what I just don't want to have. Yeah. And it ruins the actual day of the wedding day is supposed to be about, my missus and I tying the knot. It's supposed to be a happy occasion.

00:47:57:07 – 00:48:20:10
Not worry. Not worry about awkwardness. You know, celebrating love and family and all those other things. The lead up to it, I just that's that's what puts me off all those things and. Yeah. Yeah, that I mean, luckily we, managed to avoid that because, obviously everyone who I was going to come apart from locals was to come came.

00:48:20:12 – 00:48:36:10
But also you just think like starting the day bits a bit like like when it's your own wedding or a close mate. You want to see them. Yeah, but I would have no issues. So if I just got the evening, I'd be like, I've just got to come to the party. Bit of all right. Yeah, well, the bit where I get spangled.

00:48:36:10 – 00:49:25:19
Yes, please. Yeah, yeah, that sounds absolutely fine. Yeah, yeah, yeah I totally I mean that is, that's, that's my, the they have my wedding hang ups like you were just mentioning then right about, how your life is as a married man. How has it like, has it been any dynamic change or anything that is change within your relationship now that you are married and you're obviously you're doing a house up and and all of that stuff, but after like, you see a lot of people not maybe not as well, but there's the whole falling in love and then you have a child or whatever, and then it's, it's the, you know, the process,

00:49:25:19 – 00:49:50:01
the steps. You're leading up to getting married, and then you get married and it's like, what do we do now? Oh, we weren't actually that didn't have that much in common. But speaking to you earlier of instead of buying stockings and suspenders for your wife, you buy her pajamas with jewels, prints on them. You know, I mean, it's that has anything, anything changed?

00:49:50:01 – 00:50:13:08
Been being married now. Yeah. Yeah, if it was, I don't know what it is. For me, it's just this kind of satisfaction within my own space and my own relationship. And the that you feel like you're you, And I'm not saying that people aren't married, don't have feelings as well. Just my personal experience is you feel like you're one.

00:50:13:08 – 00:50:39:21
That's how I feel like whatever decision make, whatever money we bring in, whatever. Things we want to experience, we know that we're going to do those things together. Yeah. And obviously it's nothing to do with getting married. But relationships change and intimacy changes. And you know what? You are at the beginning where you're just fucking all the time and there's just the physical, well, we just have it.

00:50:39:23 – 00:51:01:08
It's a good time now. It's a lot of fun and it's important to have that experience to form that connection. But we all know that relationships, that stuff that isn't sustainable because relationships change. And it may be for some people, but relationships change. And then you, you, you get into the serious part which is falling in love, not in lust.

00:51:01:08 – 00:51:47:20
Yeah. And and then it comes to a point where you was seeing her in a pajamas with no makeup on, had not done is is. And it's okay. People are going to cringe. But that is as attractive to me as, when she gets pulled out for a night out. It's the it's about the comfortableness, the really real relaxation of the pretense that you have to be a certain way in order to ensure that they are found attractive and and so when you can sit in a room and not speak, but be comfortable with each other, that's the kind of thing you need.

00:51:47:22 – 00:52:03:12
That's that's the kind of thing we sort of strove to be. And it was always, always quite natural. So the point of buying a pair of jewels is because she knows I love draws as a film and I'm into sharks in a weird way, not in a sexy way, but in a way that that more than most people.

00:52:03:14 – 00:52:26:19
And the fact that she wears them is a level of intimacy that wouldn't have been there at the beginning. It's not. It's hard to explain. And so marriage just in my experience, it just it shows the well that you're connected to someone and connected to each other and I'm, I it's I've had this wedding band on now for when do we get married.

00:52:26:21 – 00:52:51:14
Well yeah. 2022. May I have no idea. 23. I should know this. I'm saying I'm putting is so was 22 with Covid when it was it just out of Covid? This is terrible. Yeah. I've had this mess, this wedding band on for I think three years. You'll be free is this summer. You've never taken it off. Well, just to clean it and stuff like.

00:52:51:15 – 00:53:17:15
Right. Okay. Oh, okay. Yeah, yeah, just to clean it, but no, it hasn't come off. And I look at it all the time and I'm proud to wear it and, and she, she is proud to wear us. And, and when people look at me, I'm I, I like the fact that they know that I'm married. Basically, it was actually quite good right when shortly after we got married, about Christmas time, we went, I went out and saw, the boys at Paul Street.

00:53:17:15 – 00:53:39:11
I used to work with, and, there was a woman at the bar, and she'd. I didn't realize, but she'd live streaming herself in the bar on Instagram, so I didn't have to use some sort of influence or something like that. Yeah. Anyway, she's just tried to lick my face on my stuff. Yeah, it's a bit on top.

00:53:39:12 – 00:54:06:21
I it was she she horrible. Yeah. She licked the side of my face. Unsolicited. Whoa. Back off. Do you see this ring? I didn't quite see it like that, but, you know, it was it was, it was nice to say that you might get away from me. Slag. Yeah. I mean, that is. I mean, you've beautifully put that the kind of, the comfortable ness within your relationship.

00:54:06:21 – 00:54:26:11
Yep. And I feel that too, as well. And it's not this kind of living up to this pretense of, you know, what you were talking about earlier, Olivia Attwood and the the kind of the fake. Yeah. Of, what's the word I'm looking for? You know, the esthetics of a partner and living by. I love you because you've got a six pack.

00:54:26:11 – 00:54:48:04
Yeah. And any of that stuff. And I would much prefer to have what you've just spoken about. I mean, that is, I think that's what everyone strives for. I think on that note, I'm going to leave that there because that was that was pretty, you know, that was that was beautiful. Right? Right. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. No it's good.

00:54:48:06 – 00:55:13:11
And for on that note, we're going to go to dilemmas and something that, you know, that the dilemma is called miserable missionary. And then something on, you know, is called sticky situation. But before we do that, the topic for next week, we mentioned this in a couple of podcasts ago. We're going to be talking about road trips.

00:55:13:13 – 00:55:38:05
What's the longest. Right? I love a road trip. What's the longest road trip you've ever been on? Do you enjoy long drives? Are you a driver or the passenger? Do I have you ever driven across countries mad breakdowns, crashes? If you were ever visited a layby when you've been driving? Cheeky bit of token. We want to hear from you if that is you.

00:55:38:07 – 00:56:03:01
Anything, any stories that you have about road trips, send it over to lads anon pod at gmail.com and we will read them out. If you have any more topic suggestions as well, please send them over. I've just read out the email, don't need to do it again. And now we are going to be going into dilemmas. Let's get a camper van!

00:56:03:01 – 00:56:33:12
Rick on my I fucking love to do that. Let's just do it. In a camper van and drive somewhere we can sleep in the camper van. Oh mate, now imagine how good that would be. Let's do it. Let's do it. Oh, just, just tired. You got an issue for a tissue? You're a big sack. And when you a aching in your soul, alone in your flat.

00:56:33:17 – 00:56:49:18
Please talk to Ricky flat. Good. Let that stretch off your chest. Well, friends, you deserve this place like you're safe here to get nice wall between Ricky, you and.

00:56:49:20 – 00:57:16:06
This is industry. I'm in my 40s. I've been divorced for five years after leaving my childhood sweetheart of 25 years. And two kids are a better model. We've had a rocky relationship since we got together, but have finally found some peace since moving out to the country. My problem lies in the fact my new missus is the most boring shag I've ever had.

00:57:16:08 – 00:57:39:04
She just isn't up for anything other than missionary. She always covers up her more embarrassing parts of her body, but just always wants to lie on her back and get abortion. I've tried to, I've tried everything to try and get her to do more in the bedroom. I've bought a toys and outfits, but they still remain unopened in the original boxes.

00:57:39:06 – 00:58:06:04
She's in her late 40s, and yes, age is catching up with her, but I don't see anything wrong. I think she's got a cracking figure on, I tell her every day and how much she turns me on, but nothing. We have regular sex, but it's more of a routine than an experience. I know it's all in her head about how she looks, but how can I get her to be more open and relaxed when it comes to being more adventurous in the sack?

00:58:06:06 – 00:58:27:17
Any advice lads, that doesn't involve getting a bra would be greatly appreciated. It's time. That's exactly what I was saying. My like when I, read that and I was reading that to myself and I was like, okay, dilemmas, I'm going to say get in. The last I got to the end to end. Well, like, fuck, the joke's run thin.

00:58:27:18 – 00:58:48:19
That wasn't it a little bit, Oh, man, I don't know. Everyone's different. You, you what's her past? Like what? There must be reasons why some people are just prudish. Some people genuinely just don't enjoy sex like they're asexual, but they realize it's part of the relationship, a big part of a relationship. And they just,

00:58:48:21 – 00:59:19:23
They just don't want to, which is fine as well. But also, you could, you know, you've got your needs and stuff. What do you think, Ricky? I'm hoping to, pull up. Yeah. I mean, yeah, I, it's a hard one, isn't it? Because no matter what you say about your partner or anyone says about, you know, I said earlier about my body jiggling when I was going down the stairs, and I mentioned it to my missus, and she rolled their eyes and she said, what are you talking about?

00:59:19:23 – 00:59:45:15
You know, talking nonsense. She said that I don't automatically feel like, oh, okay. She said, it's nonsense. I feel better about myself. Like body confidence doesn't come from another person saying, you turn me on. You're really sexy. I love this, I love that it has to come from within. Yes. And they need to feel comfortable within their own skin.

00:59:45:17 – 01:00:14:06
You're like, flap says, I don't know her past or anything like that. And again, she might just not be, you know, have a high sex drive or want to do any of those things. Now, I think when you kind of leave little, treats for her, as in sex toys and outfits and stuff like that, you kind of like it.

01:00:14:08 – 01:00:31:20
It makes an issue of it. Do you know what I mean? It's like, I know that you're not up for it, but I'm going to try and force you to spice it up this way. I don't know, you may be having a conversation with her. Maybe just having a, not like a forceful one. Why do you only do it?

01:00:31:20 – 01:01:02:07
But, like, just broach it after you've had a few drinks or something like that, just to try and see where the problem lies? I don't know, it's a hard one. If there were any ladies listening to this podcast, and I know there are, because you've emailed in and you message right? What? What is it that for, a lady to having listened to this dilemma, what would it be?

01:01:02:13 – 01:01:28:17
The barriers for someone to be a bit more adventurous in the bedroom. And I know you said that that is a this is a hard question to answer, and we don't know the full context of their. But you can see that there are so many times where I mean, I know mates, right? Where it's like a, let's just say a similar situation and you Mrs..

01:01:28:17 – 01:01:49:05
Could be she comes home from work, you've taken the kids to the grandparents, you've done a lovely dinner. You've bought roses, you've bought, new, I don't know, a fucking ring or whatever. And it's like you've done all this. You've you've brought the red carpet out and then you're like, oh, maybe it's going to be. It's going to be one of them.

01:01:49:05 – 01:02:17:14
One's going to come on top. And it doesn't happen. And you're like, well, I've done everything I need to. It's not, it's it's not. You can't control it. It's it's yeah, it's something within. Yeah. It's like those, gifts and those notes and those kind of like nudging of, okay, I've done this. We should lead to that. In my experience, it doesn't really work, and it needs to come from that person within.

01:02:17:16 – 01:02:44:10
And that's, that's all I can give you, I'm afraid. Right. You know, I don't have any magic tricks or any kind of things that will tell her to get yet Mrs. Randi or more adventurous. You know, you could tell me as well, but. Yeah. Sorry. So that's. And that's all we've got for you. So should we, jump into something and, you know.

01:02:44:12 – 01:02:52:02
Wow. Something, you know.

01:02:52:04 – 01:03:22:15
Sticky situation. In my early 30s, I was working shifts in London and used to go for 30 Am to commute into the city. The journey was an hour and a half. So I often use this as a means to get some extra sleep. I should also add, at this point I was in a very unhappy, sexless marriage and I had a young child, so sex was scarce, as was the opportunity to crack one out without having my whole card ex catching me.

01:03:22:17 – 01:03:46:21
That is. One morning I got on the train and as usual, fell asleep about 20 minutes from London. I woke myself up by making a groan in brackets. Sex, noise and a sense of relief. However, I also felt a silkiness in my boxers and my black work trousers. To my horror, I know I knew I'd become a sexy dreamer.

01:03:46:23 – 01:04:16:16
Of course, why wouldn't my body decide this is the time to have my first sexual? And disappointingly, that's been my only one. Unfortunately, arriving into London 6:45 a.m. meant there were no shops open to buy new boxes or trousers, but luckily the trousers were black so there were no signs on the outside of jeans. When I got into the office, I visited the toilet to discover an unholy amount of man milk in my boxers and hips.

01:04:16:18 – 01:04:46:12
I made a decision to sit at the desk at work for a couple of hours and go to the shops around 9 a.m. to buy new boxers and trousers. But as it was, work was too busy and I never got the opportunity. In the end, I just like everything crossed up and completed my shift as an I.T Helpdesk Engineer, walking through desk to desk, helping users with computer issues who were blissfully unaware I was doing so in crusty Jersey Clive's.

01:04:46:14 – 01:05:08:10
As soon as I got home, I put the clothes straight in the wash, so my sexy dream incident was not discovered and that is something I need. I know beautiful, beautiful. That was oh God man, I have. Yeah, I've got so, I've not done it traveling into work. That would be fucking up. You know, I don't even think I'd going to work.

01:05:08:16 – 01:05:32:08
I'll just get the train, the next train home and say I was ill. I couldn't go into work having done that in my trousers. I actually I have got a story that I'll tell next week, which is very relevant for the topic. And the topic next week is long journeys, traveling by car, road trips. That's right. I forgotten what I said.

01:05:32:10 – 01:05:53:01
Road trips. If you have any kind of road trips, long journeys, long journeys that I was like, fuck what? What did I say earlier? I saw you looking for it. I know that's like, fuck, fuck road trips, road trips, right? Cheers guys. I think we lost it again. So rotate. If you've got any road trip stories please let us know.

01:05:53:01 – 01:06:00:10
Send it in to lads anon pod at gmail.com and until then we'll see you on Monday. Bye.