#15 | Fighting | before you throw a punch, think of this first…

00:00:00:00 – 00:00:24:07
Hello and welcome to Lads Anonymous. It's episode 15, a podcast with two best mates of over 20 years. Invite you to join their safe space where all manner of subjects will be discussed. We'll focus on a specific subject matter first and then answer your questions, dilemmas or need for advice, all handled anonymously. So sit back, relax and enjoy the podcast.

00:00:24:10 – 00:00:52:20
Hello, Flav, I may I'm hung over. Are you? Yeah. What were you doing, you little scam idiot? I did, you know what? I took some more magic mushrooms and watched Norwich versus Ipswich in 2015. Oh my God. Well, why why, why? Cause you're interested in things you wouldn't normally be interested in. Okay, I was looking it. A big weekend for Spurs and it's derby weekend.

00:00:52:22 – 00:01:08:16
Yeah that was a derby and God knows why. And I went to bed too late. And that was a 42 year old man. If you go to bed too late, the next day's a write off. It's just the way it is. But what were you drinking? Just like having beers or wine or had some wine. And then what?

00:01:08:16 – 00:01:23:11
I had a bottle of wine. Oh, and then obviously I had. And you had that one bottle. Also had some whiskey. Shit, man. Rough, man. Really, really rough. What?

00:01:23:13 – 00:01:47:11
We were talking before started about. Yeah. Instagram reels and tick tock, tick tock. Like a tame version. Instagram Reels. You see some mental stuff on there on Instagram. You can, you can? Yeah. You can search for, like, hashtag banned content and you can see some fucking mad, naughty stuff isn't it's not real bad stuff. What about, like, death videos?

00:01:47:13 – 00:02:06:16
Yeah. Yeah, yeah. Horrendous stuff. Well, why are you searching for that? Well, someone told me you could do that, and I was like, yeah, ballocks, mate, they fucking police all this other look. And immediately I was like, Jesus Christ, this is why this is not this is not what I wanted. How why is why was you so curious?

00:02:06:16 – 00:02:23:06
You had to check. I'm like, you told me that I believe you are never going to look. No, no. Yeah, I know, but I had to check. You always got to check. There's going to be people listening. That is Ricky talking. Ballocks. And then you go, you have a look. How bad? There's loads of death. Loads of death.

00:02:23:06 – 00:02:36:10
And it's that horrible death as well. Loads of, like, really horrible injuries. Although I do, I do, I do like reels and compilations where people are falling over.

00:02:36:12 – 00:02:55:07
Doing stunts on their BMX and they fall on their face like, I like all that stuff, but this is like next level where I'm like, okay, this is supposed to stop here. How? But I mean, they yeah, yeah, they are, but I don't I got serious to see. I don't know why. Look, because I'm scared. I'm really squeamish.

00:02:55:09 – 00:03:20:11
Unless it's a shark attack video. Not interested. Like that shark attack video from Egypt last year. Last summer. I must have watched that. It's sick, man. I must have watched it about. I'd say 50 times fucking. Yeah, that's. That's weird. I've seen it a few times and although I was interested in it, just the screaming of the boy, he's not just.

00:03:20:13 – 00:03:41:05
Yeah, just hang on. Just in case people haven't seen. It's not a small boy being attacked. It's. I mean, this is not. I mean, he was 23 year old guy. Yeah. So if I wouldn't watch a video that was a child. The reason let me let me in on some some coming across were really weird. It I'm not I've been infatuated with sharks since I was a kid.

00:03:41:10 – 00:04:14:23
Right. And what I thought wasn't possible in jaws. Like the attacks happening like that, it I, I, I just didn't it was it was make believe. And this video is like a scene out of jaws is fucking horrible. It's horrible. But it's it's this something it's I can't describe. It's like the most and it's my greatest fear. I think that's why I'm drawn to it.

00:04:15:00 – 00:04:41:00
The thing is, the thing that I find crazy about it is how close it is to the to the, shoreline. So close. It's like anyone can get it. A man is. Doesn't matter where you are. Yeah, and, it's a tiger shark. And that area of the sea has been the been what area of the planet? There's been a lot of, shark attacks in recent years.

00:04:41:00 – 00:04:59:22
It's been a spike in the. I say a lot. We're talking about 5 or 6, and, man, it was mental, was horrible. It was grim. And the bit where he gets turned and his legs go in the air. May, that is a massive tiger shark as well. Shit. That's. Yeah, that's like it's the worst. There is no worse.

00:05:00:01 – 00:05:22:15
There's no worse way to go and been eaten alive, for fuck's sake. No. Go at that. I can't even think about it. No, no, I don't I don't, watch it later. And when I, when I go for my little, search of banned content later,

00:05:22:17 – 00:05:55:05
Going back to, last episode. Yeah. Health anxieties, anxieties in general. Good, good feedback. There a lot of people out there with, health anxieties. And I think we touched on a bit of, well, I certainly spoke of that. I was on I was prescribed anti-depressants for my anxiety. And then me trying to get off of them and, apparently you supposed to wean yourself off, and I just stopped cold turkey.

00:05:55:07 – 00:06:12:04
And that's why I was getting electric shocks in my heart. So you say so? Yeah, you do that. And even if someone said windsurf off, you still wouldn't you just do that? Like the amount of times I've tried to give you advice and it's like, I know you're not going to do what I'm saying. I'm wasting my time.

00:06:12:06 – 00:06:32:04
You have a bad habit. Ricky is saying you'll do something and then just not doing it. Like, yeah, that's. Yeah, like we're going to Amsterdam next Friday. I'm coming, I'm coming, I'm coming, you know, coming. I no, no no no, I'll meet you in the bar, mate. Why why did you say yes if you had? Because I do this all the time.

00:06:32:04 – 00:06:53:23
It's easier to say yes than it is to say no. And then have that conversation of why I'm not doing it. And then you tell me the reasons of of getting around that so that I can go. I want a guy. So you don't you just don't want to have you. You'd rather suck. You don't want to have the conversation where I somehow try to convince you to come.

00:06:54:00 – 00:07:15:13
That's right. Yeah, yeah, I, I would I just on that. Oh if you didn't want to come, you don't want to come. It's not a problem. But what he said like, I don't know. Oh, I know, I know when you say yes, it doesn't mean you. Say no. Can't I try to say no? It's hard. You didn't try.

00:07:15:15 – 00:07:42:06
It's hard. It's bloody hard. This, This gentleman that's, emailed in. Yeah. I've been on anti-depressants for ten years now. It helps of my anxiety. When I first got introduced to them, they said the side effects were essentially that when you mix with alcohol, you would get drunker quicker and it's harder to come. I told the doctor, white sake, I get drunk faster and I have wild sex.

00:07:42:06 – 00:08:08:16
Or not get in Max dose me up. But seriously, it's been tremendous of my anxiety going forward. It's much better than a Xanax prescription. For those who have been deciding which route to take the keys to health. As someone who who is a maniac in this research, healthy diet and exercise, vitamins that are so important to whatever makes you happy.

00:08:08:18 – 00:08:31:14
But the goal is to live long exercise doesn't mean going and lifting heavy weights every day. However, weight lifting is important. It's important to keep muscle, but honestly, 30 to 60 minutes of cardio a day will be so helpful for longevity. Go for a bike ride. Take the dogs for a walk. That's the key, Flav. Then get underneath the presents.

00:08:31:14 – 00:08:58:14
Because they contract with MDMA. You don't get high on it. So I, I just know, going back to the health anxiety, everyone's got their own routes on what they want to do, and I think it's, you know, it's a taboo subject of people speaking about it and approaching it and people taking, you know, medication for it. Some people go counseling, some people, you know, you just find your own route.

00:08:58:14 – 00:09:15:04
But as long as you kind of recognize it and you try to do something about it, I really should, you know, I know that when I go for a walk, like a bit of a sweat on going for an hour's walk, I feel amazing after. I feel so much more better. And I just don't do it that often.

00:09:15:04 – 00:09:36:17
Not twice a week or something. I've never had that more. I've never had that. Like when people say the exit after the exercise, they feel great. I've never felt great after exercise. Really? Yeah, I do it. And while to be honest I have not moved since the went. No. Yeah. The wedding. So about 18 months I haven't gone to the gym, but I did.

00:09:36:17 – 00:10:00:16
Yeah, but you walk every single day with your dog drunk. Yes. But it's it's like a 25 minute round the block. It's not. Anyway, my point is, I, I've never had that sort of. Oh, I feel great. I've just worked out. It's like, fuck. That's done. I'll have to do that for another day or two. But I do feel like I need to move anyway.

00:10:00:18 – 00:10:26:18
Yeah, mate, if I mean the best way. The key, I think, is exercise, not drinking. And not like, on to the next email. Now, I didn't want to put this one first, but this is the one that I was most excited about. All right. So we did put out a question last week because I was talking about the I was talking about wet dreams.

00:10:26:22 – 00:10:50:09
Still having them. And I didn't know if women have the same. Do they are I know they have never heard of it though. But but did they orgasm in their sleep? Yeah. Okay. I wanted to email in about Sexy Dreams topic as you guys were musing this week. If this happens to women and I can confirm it does.

00:10:50:11 – 00:11:14:14
I'm a 40 year old, 43 year old female, and I experience a sexy dream and an orgasm in my sleep at least once a month. For context, I was married to someone for 15 years and never had this happen to me during those years. I met my second husband six years ago, and ever since then it's been happening to me.

00:11:14:16 – 00:11:36:16
I don't know if it's to do with the quality of sex. My ex husband and I had a very mediocre sex life in brackets. I really don't like to speak badly of him. He still one of my best friends and a great guy, and an even better father to my kids. But being frank, sex with my second husband is next level.

00:11:36:18 – 00:11:46:24
Is it this that has kickstarted this sexy nightmare nighttime phenomenon? Who knows? Oh my man. And.

00:11:47:01 – 00:12:12:17
Who knows? All I know is that I'll be having a sexy dream and will wake myself up having an orgasm. Anyway, just wanted to share my personal experience of this. Hopefully this means I get to be part of Ricky Sexy Dream. His crew and celebrate his wet dream most when it happens. Of course, everyone is everyone's welcome. I don't you don't have to be a sexy dreamer to come and celebrate this.

00:12:12:17 – 00:12:30:22
They like the way we're going. We're going to hopefully meet up at Christmas and have a yeah, big sexy dream is me up you go. Do you have two minute, two more blastoff. So, Rick. Yeah. That's cool. You'll be warmed up by that, right? I was I bloody well was, owed up not just reading this email.

00:12:30:22 – 00:12:49:16
It was like, read it. The red room in, the red room in birdsong. Birdsong is not really that old. Okay. Kind of a no where as, like Jesus read in birdsong roughly the same time as we. I think you'd read it before me, but then you were like, straight after. You're like, read this book now.

00:12:49:17 – 00:13:19:15
It's brilliant. Birdsong is up there. It's an incredible book. So if you need something to read and you haven't read it, but, by Sebastian Faulks, I think you. That's right. But there's a, there's a, there's a bit of a steamy scene, isn't there. Yeah. And it takes, it takes you by surprise. It's so out of context. And what was going on, I remember I was, I was working at a hospital and it was break time, I think at half, seven and a half, ten in the morning.

00:13:19:17 – 00:13:41:13
And as I see in my, I eat my toast having my coffee and I got to this page or pages, there's about three pages and, and I got to I read it and I had to go back and reread it again because I didn't quite understand what I was reading. So it's half ten in the morning. I got a blob on, I'm eating toast, I'm eating toast, and I've got a low bun, like, what is going on?

00:13:41:13 – 00:14:02:20
This is fucking wild. Eats it. I was reading, I was reading on the train. I was like, oh, I'm like, oh my lord. The thing is, it's it's not easy to write erotic scenes in books. Not it's a difficult thing to get, right. Yeah. Me, I was I was like, fucking this is this is better than Erasmus. Yeah.

00:14:02:20 – 00:14:24:10
It was, it was, beautiful. Beautiful bit of and loved it. Loved every minute of it. Speaking of sexy stuff in books, the, American Psycho has some pretty mental stuff in there. Yeah, yeah, you're like some wild stuff. Some really wild stuff. And you're like, you're you're reading it and you're like, why am I turned on? This is fucking sick.

00:14:24:12 – 00:14:46:16
Yeah. That's. Yeah. It's that, it's that contrast in it of it's really sexy. But this is also murdering as well. So you don't, you don't know where you're at. I don't think he's murdering I wasn't I wasn't turned on by the murdering. It was just the sex scenes. And then the murder happens and you're like, oh, that's a shame.

00:14:46:18 – 00:15:08:07
I didn't know, I didn't know, I didn't know where it stops. So you're really on the sex scene and you're like, yeah, yeah, I'm turned on now that's, you know, something, I guess brighten the day up a bit. And, and then suddenly there's a murder and you're like, oh, I'm still turned on. Can't just turn it off, like, quick, kind of not going to read it and go.

00:15:08:08 – 00:15:30:15
Suddenly my buddy goes, all right, not, not turned on. So like Trixie then is, sorry. Your body's like, get the blood out. Get the blood out the window. Stop it. Stop it from happening. We've had a we've had never email in. I've got this one. No. Jeez. No party. Good. Great podcast, by the way. I've been listening since the start.

00:15:30:20 – 00:15:57:13
But after hearing about Ricky's wet dreams, something happened to me last night. I've never had a wet dream in all 24 years on this planet. However, last night I woke in the early hours after having a vivid dream in which I was banging the pornstar Natalia star after her little lies. There you go while you're doing it. The dream seemed like reality, but I awoke to no ejaculation anywhere.

00:15:57:15 – 00:16:20:22
Maybe it could have been down to banging the missus before going to sleep, but there was nothing anywhere when I woke. Just putting it out there. You can have the dream without chasing yourself. Keep up the great work. Well, I mean, I don't know if he did he have a fro. I'm unsure whether he yet. He had the throbbing and there was nothing there.

00:16:20:22 – 00:16:41:11
And maybe because he had sex that. But it's not a wet dream if you don't blast off, is it. Yeah. You need to be wet. Yeah, yeah, but you know, it's all about mate. Leave it to the pros. All right? Let's leave it to the pros. So a little look what he's into, then. Images.

00:16:41:13 – 00:17:02:24
We're getting loads of people that are suddenly finding the podcasts, and they're listening back to the episodes that we've done. A bit boring. Like, of all the things that. Sorry to interrupt me again. Just a blond bird with big knock. Yeah. Big knockers. Yeah. You can have a dream about something. Yeah, a bit more inventive than that. Anyway.

00:17:03:01 – 00:17:30:10
But those are people listening back to old episodes. Yeah. So this person discovered the Fear of flying episode. Okay. I'm a lady listener in my mid 30s. Yes, yes. And an automatic download. Yeah. From this days. Come on, let's go. You two are responsible for at least two instances of shooting coffee out of my nose from laughing. I hope the coffee wasn't hot.

00:17:30:10 – 00:17:57:01
By the way, your episode about Floyd made me feel so incredibly validated. My flight anxiety has only gotten worse over the years, and spiked just a month ago when I was flying overnight to London. The turbulence was horrendous. We we flew from Atlanta to London, and for five of the eight hour flight I was near tears because it was so bumpy and horrible and dark.

00:17:57:03 – 00:18:23:13
Everyone around me was sleeping or watching a movie. What the fuck? Why are they so calm? I kept asking my husband this over and over again. I kept asking if I should maybe just ask the flight attendant when they thought the turbulence would be over and if this was normal. So I'm glad you found it incredibly validating and we know you aren't.

00:18:23:14 – 00:18:43:15
Yeah, you're not the only one. We we were big fear of flying here. Yeah. And we know we worked out last week. It's not really fear of flying, is it? It's fear of dying. Yeah. Also, we also know because our friend Ben is a pilot, he. Yeah. There has never been a plane that's brought up, been brought out of the sky by turbulence.

00:18:43:17 – 00:19:06:02
Ever. That's that's, you know, saying. I feel like it. That isn't true. We keep saying it, and I'm pretty sure we, And I think we said that on on the pod as well, but that's that statement I keep, like a folded napkin close to my chest when I'm flying, when there's a bit of turbulence, don't Google know that.

00:19:06:03 – 00:19:25:10
Okay. Right. Let's don't not no, don't get on, for fuck's sake. If you're going to take. No, I ain't got there is no chance of me googling that. Thank God I owe you. You googled fucking death and drop videos on Instagram. But you know, can turbulence bring down a plane? Nah. I'm I'm yeah, I'm. And like, scared of flying.

00:19:25:10 – 00:19:46:08
So I don't want to I don't want to know the ins and outs of air that I'm getting. I'm getting on a plane next Friday. Yeah. Oh, I'm getting one of the, in the May as well for a stag. So I'm a little bit. Oh, and and I booked, you know, because I didn't want to pay extra money to select my seat.

00:19:46:08 – 00:20:08:18
So I did random selection. So I think God knows who I'm going to be seeing live, but I probably should have chose where I wanted to sit because, yeah, beer, I beer, I just how would the person stand next to me? Actually, we got a message in from a listener of the show. I'll play it to you.

00:20:08:20 – 00:20:39:01
Come on then. Oh, there, mate, you're in the family or. Well, I'm just catching up on lads anonymous. And they're in the health and anxiety one. You can let Ricky know. I used to be terrified of flying black to the point where I wasn't doing it, or I was avoiding it as much as I could. And I went and saw a hypnotherapist, and I've been brand since I've flown probably 3 or 4 times since then, a couple of years ago.

00:20:39:06 – 00:20:59:05
And yeah, I'm kind of fine now. Yeah. So it was Alex and he was he had a fear of flying. You wouldn't see hypnotherapist and got got over it. I am seriously considering them. I've got to do it. Yeah, I've got to do it. Yeah, I'll do that. Right. What else we got before we jump in to the main topic?

00:20:59:06 – 00:21:27:08
Yeah, the people of Instagram that are screenshotting listening to lads anonymous tagging us your legends. This is exactly what we want. So when you're listening to Lads anonymous, take a screenshot, go to Instagram Stories, post it, tag us and will reshare it. It's been amazing to see there's loads of funny people fucking listen on their watches. Yeah, it's that it's like that.

00:21:27:10 – 00:21:57:02
That's not me on their Apple Watches and Fitbit watches. Like some of thousand 500 miles away. Wasn't they? Someone was in. Yeah. And someone also was in Mexico, Mexico City airport listening to lads. Anonymous. Amazing. So we love to see when you're listening, where you're listening and how you're listening. So carry on doing that. And if your account is private we won't get the notifications.

00:21:57:02 – 00:22:20:16
So we won't be able to share it. But please feel free to screengrab it and send it to us in a DM on Twitter. There's so many private and we'll reshare it. I don't know, I mean, not because people that post their family pictures and pictures of our house. And then I want to say, I want to say I, I want to say, I can't because it's weird, isn't it?

00:22:20:16 – 00:22:42:11
Because I don't know, you, but I want to. Oh, I see everything. Yeah, I don't do that. If they accounts private and I don't know them. Leave it alone. I know it's weird, but you can't follow accounts that you don't know. And it's private. I've. I've followed people by mistake, and now unfollow them because I feel like it's rude.

00:22:42:13 – 00:23:06:06
And now we're friends for life. Yeah. But, Yeah, I want to see all the all the stuff. So it's annoying sometimes. Yeah. Get off private. Everyone go. Oh, yeah. Show shows where you go. Come on. I don't mean, like, in a, Let's, let's talk about what we're talking about. Ricky, what is the subject for today?

00:23:06:06 – 00:23:16:06
Saturday. Saturday. Saturday? Saturday. Saturday. Saturday is all right for five.

00:23:16:08 – 00:23:45:03
So today's topic is Saturday. Oh, fighting. Fighting. You fucking don't want to do it in tandem with you? I don't want to. Why? Just because. What does that. No two are to get right. Well, today's topic is fighting. Yeah. Fighting. So I remember bowling round your house, seen pictures of you as a kid. You long blond hair.

00:23:45:05 – 00:24:06:24
A little bit road in a from. If I'm honest, I. Come on. Right. Okay. Did you did you throw hands as a wee is a wee boy? I don't think. Didn't that was in your nature. Didn't look like much of a fight. No. Well, I had fights. Oh, what? I had had fights. You took, like, my.

00:24:07:05 – 00:24:27:24
In school. Secondary school? Well, okay. Can we say with the the description of you. Yeah, I just gave. And you were like that in secondary school. Yeah. I had long blond hair. I was very skinny. Can you give a description of the type of school that you went to, the graphics of the makeup of everyone that was there?

00:24:28:00 – 00:25:02:24
Yeah, I was, I was only one of three white kids in my class. So I know what it's like to be an ethnic minority. So, you know, and I understand and I'm sympathetic because being white in my school was the hardest race to be. It was difficult. So, yeah, it was like the, the, five years before I joined that school, the head teacher was battered by a student.

00:25:03:01 – 00:25:22:16
It was lovely. Ranked as a fifth worst school in the UK and some god knows reason. My parents said, yep, that's fine, let's go to that school. They let me choose to be fair, and my brothers were going to my step brothers were going there. So I tell you, and you chose it. Yeah, well it was it wasn't much choice.

00:25:22:16 – 00:25:41:01
There was Holloway boys, or there was Highbury Grove, and they were both fucking awful. In fact, Holloway boys, they would turn up outside the school gates and there'd be like, come on in this, it Abbey Grove, just because you went to another school, it was like it was on site. Yeah, that happened around there. What did you go to an all boys school?

00:25:41:01 – 00:26:03:06
Yeah. What, you chose to go to an all boys school? Yeah, man. Wow. That is so that 11 year olds make decisions. That's the thing. That's the. No. That's the yeah. That is silly. That was a bloody silly one from your parents. Yeah. They said what school do you want to go to Harvey Grove. Okay. That's fine. My older brother said brother but was there and my step was my age was there and we were going to give out.

00:26:03:06 – 00:26:23:03
So the idea was like, why say numbers and that? But that makes sense. It was so, so in that type of environment, it was like paint. There was fucking some Catholic kids got murdered, got shot. It's crazy. Not at the school, but they went to the school. It was rough. It was a tough school. And I look like that.

00:26:23:05 – 00:26:43:03
So it wasn't easy. Did it? Did it come on top? Because, of the way you looked? Yeah, it was, I don't know if it was the way I look. Maybe. Maybe there was this one kid that you said, bully me, say, bully me. Oh, yeah. You know, I suppose it would be called bullying. I was he was horrible, man.

00:26:43:03 – 00:27:13:06
He was a fucking scumbag. When his older brother was the toughest kid in the school. And even if he wasn't, this kid was a nasty piece of work. Anyway, I was sort of willing to do stuff, but he he. It started that episode of about 3 or 4 years of me having to kind of look out for him started because my mate, he was a fucking idiot, stole, he mugged his friend.

00:27:13:08 – 00:27:32:10
Oh, God. And because I was with them. Not when it happened, but because I was with we were in a part of a group. I got targeted because it was me and this kid punched me in the eye, a massive black guy. I got the fucking stick. And that kid and not the kid who was responsible never did anything.

00:27:32:10 – 00:28:01:07
And the first opportunity to get rid of him, I cut him out of my life as soon as obviously, as soon as the opportunity I could get rid of him, I did because he watched what happened. It was his fault and he did nothing and never said anything about it. What a fucking bastard. So on went this long winded sort saga through my school period where he would try and that he would be beaten, try to intimidate me.

00:28:01:09 – 00:28:23:23
And it wasn't until after school I met him after school, after I'd left years later and saw him, and he was very he didn't want to make eye contact or anything like that, but I really have you, any of these people, have you looked him up on Facebook, makes him Facebook or anything like that, and, not interested, not not interested.

00:28:24:00 – 00:28:45:08
What can I possibly gain from from being interested in either of them? Nothing. Yeah, it's true, I suppose. Is that maybe morbid curiosity? I'm not interested. Maybe it's such a long, long time. But that was. That was an example. But I had outside of that, I had normal fights with kids. Really? Yeah. Yeah. We'd have like my, my mum might show.

00:28:45:08 – 00:29:08:19
I mean he, he kicked it. I was leaving the classroom and he kicked the door and it slammed shut on my head. I, I so much I was, so at him up or tried me. Yeah. We got into a fight. You had black eyes. I had black eyes. Bad one. Oh, that's a good fight. Yeah, it was quite equal.

00:29:08:22 – 00:29:30:19
One. Nice. He still it still makes of him. I would be, I would be, but we just sort of drifted apart after college. So I don't know, I'd happily. Yeah. I mean, we, we were good mates after school. It was me and him that we stayed in contact for. For the longest. I'd known him since I was a kid, but since I was in primary school and we just stayed friends, he was.

00:29:30:21 – 00:29:55:09
It was there was a girl that I fancied. I think I told the story. Yeah, a love rival. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And so he kind of got with her and then they sort of went off of their relationship and just had to drift apart. I went to university and that was that. But, out of out of him, I, I had a long running saga with a guy who Jermaine Edwards a who we had fights a lot.

00:29:55:11 – 00:30:20:06
I really for, we had about 3 or 4 fights. Yeah. Fucking. And we were right outside. Generally we were okay with each other, but we fighting about. I can't remember. I don't know, it's absolute ginormous dick as well really. That wasn't what we were fighting. I remember in swimming I was like, oh my lord, what is that?

00:30:20:10 – 00:30:48:09
Yeah. Yeah, we would fight a lot. And then Carl, there was a kid who called Thompson. We had a fight. He beat me up pretty bad. Not bad. Like, But I even, I would assume that just assuming. Because you have a shitload of brothers that your streetwise in fighting would be your fight. IQ would be quite fairly high.

00:30:48:11 – 00:31:05:24
We all know when my brothers ever. Never. I've never even had the hug. My brothers would never, not even, like, play, fight fighting or like, you run in a fight and must step. Brother Glen, I we had fights at home about 3 or 4. Not serious fights, but fights where we punched each other in the face. Oh my God.

00:31:05:24 – 00:31:21:21
Really? Yeah. He was bigger than me though, so it was tough. It was hard work. What do you mean? I mean, I you just you don't know what you're doing when your kid fight in the my school, right? You know, my school. There was this kid who's Scott Pearson, and he was a boxer, you know, as a box.

00:31:21:23 – 00:31:41:17
And all this keeps us was trying to bully him or get money out of him. And he battered the kid. Good. Yeah. You would think the kid come out of a gang and absolutely filled him in. Oh, that's that's, that's how it ended. So it's all. It's like if he if there is a bully, punch him and they will away.

00:31:41:17 – 00:32:05:00
Bullshit. Not in my school. It was anyway. If you know comfortably, they come back with more with their mates. I, I had a couple of fights during school. One of the ones that sticks out. I don't know what happened. I was in, I think I was in math class. And as with this other lad, and we were just winding each other up, winding each other up.

00:32:05:02 – 00:32:27:16
And then I snapped and I punched him in the face. And that was that. But as I punched him in the face, his older brother was walking past a classroom at that exact moment and saw me punch him in the face. Was it on top? So he waited for me outside a maths. So as I was coming out of maths, he started like trying to talk to me and my my other mates were there.

00:32:27:16 – 00:32:49:11
They walked off at this point as well. They kind of knew what was going on. Well, let's just left you to it. Yeah, just left me to it and then all of a sudden bang straight in the face and I was like, oh, fucking hell, man. I have been punched in the face. And then another one bang straight in the face and I was at my I, I'm going to have to do something because I'm, I'm not I did not.

00:32:49:11 – 00:33:13:20
Well, so I just started fucking going into this geezer. And I was like, I had a second. I went in and I was just fucking landing punches, and I was like, shit, boy, I've got no idea how to fight. I've. I've got an older brother. I wasn't a rough and tumble kid, proper mummy's boy. But I think when it comes on top and you're at school, is that fight or flight?

00:33:13:20 – 00:33:33:12
I just knew, I knew I had to just to keep landing and I had to keep going forward. And then afterwards he was just backing off. I was like, fuck you get it went in. And then he was with his mates and he was backing off and I was like, it's done, it's done. And then he said, let that be a lesson to you, right?

00:33:33:12 – 00:34:01:02
And after he said that, one more thing, go back to your own country. And I was like, right, well, you know, just fucking. Yeah. Fill you in, son. That was one of my fights. And I don't really think I had there was like scuffles and stuff, but I can't really recall proper fighting. I always remember when a fight was being arranged and a fight got out.

00:34:01:02 – 00:34:34:21
Yeah. And I remember these two lads that arranged to fight outside. Reggie's fish and chip shop. So then, like, literally the whole school emptied out and went to go there, and they were throwing haymakers at each other, like proper banging each other up. And one of the lads in the scuffle lost his shoe. So he was fighting with one shoe on, one side off, and then they both fell to the floor and somehow he grabbed his shoe that was off, and he was whacking the person over the edge of a shoe.

00:34:34:23 – 00:35:01:06
It was fantastic viewing, but apart from that, yeah, you would get lads that would come in exactly like you just said. Someone lose a fight, right? I'm going to go and call my crew. I would have whatever. They'd come down in their cars and kill someone in proper. But it it was and again, like the schools there was rivalries but it was nothing that I really remember that proper got out of hand or anything like that.

00:35:01:08 – 00:35:19:07
So yeah, it was all right. School. School was right. I didn't really get into like loads of fights, usually scuffles here in the middle school, wasn't it? Yeah it was. Yeah. Yeah. I think the boys school thing was that was that was the issue. There was a lot of testosterone and kids and a lot of hormones flying around, isn't it?

00:35:19:07 – 00:35:39:22
And, Yeah. May I remember once I was in a stairwell walking down and a kid put a knife to my throat. If I told you a story for. I think you have. Yeah, it. Go on. He put a knife to my throat so the blade was against my skin. Jesus. And asked me for dinner, money or whatever it was.

00:35:39:24 – 00:35:59:03
I can't remember what happened if I. If I had my I didn't it maybe I didn't even have any. And then he walked off and it didn't affect me. Right. He didn't. It was like, of course that sort of stuff happens. People have lost people I know now is like the thought that happened to Will or something like that is mental.

00:35:59:05 – 00:36:24:12
I remember I remember dropping off well for the first day at school and thinking, fuck, he's not going to mind if I go here in, in, out in West Country where it's all good. Your school sounds horrible and how many exaggerate? And I promise you, I'm not I this is what it was. We would have the be fights and then naturally in school when a fight happens everyone runs to it because it's like the most exciting thing in the world.

00:36:24:14 – 00:36:55:24
We can fight, fight, fight, fight. And then someone bust their nose and blood was carried out and everyone was in blood fight blood fight. But but but but but blood. But. Yeah, it was mad. The one time I avoided, Joe from school, I think that I've been able to avoid trouble as an adult. Yeah, it was learning and reading the room and understanding and picking up where danger might be, picking up on energy as well.

00:36:55:24 – 00:37:19:03
I've been I've I'm. I'm really good at sensing if there is an issue before it happens. When I was at university, we was in this club and I could sense that these lads at this table were off straightaway. Just felt wrong about them. I'm not talking about, like, some mystic thing. It's just. Yeah, I can feel it. I can feel the tension.

00:37:19:05 – 00:37:44:23
And my mate Adam, we went to a lovely school in the north somewhere, and he just went down to their table. Adam, what are you doing? I was so good. I ended up fighting over it. Well, why do you. You had a brain tumor as well, couldn't you? Could have killed him. Jesus Christ, I was like Adam, the last place you sit because there was no.

00:37:44:23 – 00:38:03:03
Have a seat. So he just thought, I'll just sit here and have a drink and I thought, maybe that's not. And that's my point, is that school, because of the tense environment, I learned about learning a lot about being a bit streetwise, I guess, about these things anyway. Not yeah, I was gonna say, like, grown up, like, this is when you get to university.

00:38:03:03 – 00:38:35:11
So, like, we're now let's just say we're 18 plus an 18 plus early 20s going out pubs, clubs, bars, alcohol. There's a lot of young lads around, testosterone flying about the gaff. Did you see a lot of fights around pubs and clubs and all that lot? Did you get involved in any fights? Not, you know, no, not really.

00:38:35:13 – 00:39:03:22
Again, you look well. You know, I think we've spoken about this, but my brother made a really great point that because you're in a pub, you learn where the line was really quickly and, how to engage with people. And if you overstep the line, you get bad, right? So you learn. Whereas a lot of young people these days, they don't go to pubs, so they don't know that their line step is habitual line steppers.

00:39:03:24 – 00:39:27:17
So no consequences. But I do remember one time we went to Camden and Camden those times. Yeah, because of my I won't say his name, but he might not want the story out there. But we were someone we know, okay? And we were with a couple of girls and. Yep, we were waiting for a taxi and someone said something to the girls we were with.

00:39:27:19 – 00:39:51:05
Yes, yes yes yes. Right. Yes. And I the person was with took he took exception to what was said to one of the girls who was his friend. They weren't girlfriends or any part of that. And so he turned around and he was staring at the guy, and the guy came up to him and was saying stuff like, what you do, what you do, pussy, pussy.

00:39:51:06 – 00:40:12:17
I want you to about by or something like that. Your, your, your girlfriend's a slag. And I went over to this person and, and just whispered into his ear, this is not worth it. We've got two girls with us. There's me and Ricky. You can't fight either. They've got three lads. One of them's on the phone. God knows how many Turkish boys there were.

00:40:12:19 – 00:40:35:18
God knows how many more there could be in seconds. Let's not get into this. So I. I managed to talk him down. We took the girls and we left the area. And we were walking down Camden High Road. Do you remember what happened next week? We were walking along. I turned round to speak to him. He's running back.

00:40:35:20 – 00:41:01:11
He's running back. I think he had a bottle in his hand. He did. He put it down. I think it did. Eventually. And we were like, oh fuck, I can't let him go on his own. As much as I didn't want to get into that situation, I have to go after him. So I'm running after him. By the time I've caught up to him, we must have got about 50 to 100 yards on me.

00:41:01:13 – 00:41:20:22
By the time I'd eventually caught up to him, he was back where we were and the lads said that, said the stuff about the girl being a slag and stuff was on his back code and and the guy we, as we have, just was walking back and the look on his face, he looked like a fucking maniac. Even in his eye.

00:41:20:22 – 00:41:41:07
The geezer was just spot out. The two lads they were. We've been held by Rastafarians, Jimbo. They have been held back by Rastafarians. And look, it's a fair fight. It's a fair fight. It was one on one. Yeah. And the that was talking about it was, it was tasty in his younger days. Yeah. Change late change, man. No, but he's the love lover.

00:41:41:07 – 00:42:05:04
Scrap. He did indeed. Yeah. I thought like when we were out with him, the chances of us getting into something could have happened. Didn't. Yeah, not often, but it could have, like, grown up in the, in, in Milton Keynes we'd always go to the same bar. Barmaid. If there's any people in Milton Keynes listen to this, they'll.

00:42:05:04 – 00:42:36:22
No. And when you ended up there, you knew it was on. And I'd be fighting every point. But yeah, every single week. I think people used to go there to fight and I had mates that I was with that were tasty. Yeah, that were fearless. That worked. And they I think because of the their mental kind of capacity to they were just so mentally strong that they thought that they could win any fight.

00:42:36:24 – 00:42:54:24
I said they would be bringing it on. They they would just bring it on. I've spoken to this person since and and he was I, I what was I doing? Like why on earth did I have that mentality. Did it? I couldn't think of any. Yeah. I couldn't think of doing anything worse. Getting into a fight. Now, now you've got your family.

00:42:54:24 – 00:43:16:22
You've got your kids. Yeah. But back then he was a mad scrapper. And he would he literally would knock people out like it was a comedy bang. One punch, not one bang, one punch gun. And I'm there, standing there with my mates and just watching it all. All fucking happen. It was. It was crazy. But I knew it back then as well.

00:43:16:22 – 00:43:42:21
The CCTV wasn't that great and loads of people getting bottled pint glasses and stuff like that. It was. It was a very chaotic time going out and it was, it was really kind of like on a in. You think about it. Now, as an adult, do you think that it's still good? Yeah. Yeah, yeah. There isn't anything that would ever, make me want to fight.

00:43:42:23 – 00:44:11:04
Another another man or human anyway, because there isn't much about hurting them as I would about being hurt. The idea of punching someone in the face isn't something I. So as I've got older, it's not like something. Do you understand the idea of breaking someone's nose or heart in someone is as bad as being hurt. The idea of it, I don't care.

00:44:11:04 – 00:44:34:09
I wouldn't care about being hurt and being I've been punched in the face a few times, and other than the adrenaline and the shock and stuff like that, that bad, it's not that bad. Yeah. But it's the, the consequences that happen after it's that time that that one punch that you hit someone and they stumble back, hit the head on the curb.

00:44:34:09 – 00:45:08:12
You going down for manslaughter? It's that. Yes. Yeah. It's it's that kind of, you know, you grab someone and something happens. There's a twist of fate. You're on CCTV, you know, anything and anything that happens that takes me away from my missus and my children. I do not want to know. Yeah, and I never want to know. So, I would there was very few occasions where something would happen where I would think I'm going to after I'm going to, de-escalate the situation as much as I possibly can.

00:45:08:14 – 00:45:27:16
But if I'm with my missus or children and it's direct, it comes on top against them. Someone saying something or. Yeah. And it's one of those times where, like, I have to do something, I have, I have to defend the honor of my kids or my missus or something like that. Yeah. Then then I'm going to go in heavy handed.

00:45:27:18 – 00:45:53:19
There was like a massive big, like, hench bloke who does MMA and you, you're in a pub and he smacks your wife's ass. Yeah, but you know, he does. He's going to smash you to bits. Yeah. You've got to still do it. I don't know about that because there is, there is nothing, there is nothing more. And battered in front of them then choked out in seven seconds.

00:45:53:21 – 00:46:23:20
Is that just right though? Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's just there, lying there. And I've been put to sleep and then I start pissing myself because, you know, you go unconscious and there and it happens. It happens. Do you remember this? I think we saw it listening to this on another podcast. It's horrendous. This woman saw her, husband get battered by another man, and she found it so unattractive that you go that she.

00:46:23:20 – 00:46:43:11
When she would freak herself off, she would think about the bloke that battered her husband. Oh, my God, that's dark in it. I thought, I never want that to happen to me. Now. I think the husband shit himself as well. I can just imagine he's well, I mean, the only fight that I have in adulthood. I'm not. Right.

00:46:43:11 – 00:46:58:04
Okay? It's coming on top. Like you fucking want some do. Yeah, yeah. Let's fucking God. So, like, then you get outside and the first thing he does just gets in a box. You stop, you like, oh, I picked, I've picked the wrong person there. Yeah. Why did I go for the little guy I there's a couple of things I want to say.

00:46:58:04 – 00:47:18:14
The one the because you've got so much Instagram Reels of lads getting knocked out spark. And that should be a lesson to you. It's not difficult to get knocked out if someone lands on your chin. You're not. There is nothing. You have a nerve that runs down the chin. If enough pressure is put on that nerve, it you will pass out for a reason.

00:47:18:16 – 00:47:40:17
Do you want to be a meme that lives on the internet? If you get an absolutely poleaxed a think about what you're doing before you get into a fight. I remembered my last ever fight. My last fight happened about eight years ago. Shit, boy. I had a long running feud with my neighbor. He was an asshole. We lived at one, six, eight.

00:47:40:17 – 00:48:01:21
You might remember him. Yeah. Yeah, I do remember. Yeah. Do you remember? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, he. We would. So we had neighbors upstairs. They would play music all the time. Didn't bother us anyway. We're in the backyard. We're in the garden in this, flat. Would be like it was up there was terraced house. We had people that lived above us, and we lived in the ground floor and went out to the garden.

00:48:01:23 – 00:48:25:00
And a flat had, like, French doors opened out into a really nice big garden. Yeah. And this guy just jumped into the garden, came up to our, our door, our French doors, and just slammed them shut. And we were like, first it wasn't us. But the point is, is over that line, right? He's jumped into our property, he's slammed our doors shut.

00:48:25:02 – 00:48:45:08
And my, the I'm my. The thing that got me is, is that you made my Mrs. at the time feel unsafe. That you could come into this garden whenever you want. He jumped over his fence. Over his fence into your garden. Yeah. Come to your back door and shut your you shut your door really aggressively like slam know that's outrageous.

00:48:45:08 – 00:49:06:00
What? So what? Around his house. Oh, God. My missus was quite feisty. Yeah, she was, wasn't she? Yeah. So she's, like, not backing down either. And I was not. So I mean he's got two kids in there. So it's a kind of really rein myself in, but essentially went along the lines of I'm going to fucking do you in.

00:49:06:02 – 00:49:27:19
Do you ever set foot in our garden again? I'm going to fucking smash you up. He was very lanky and tall, weirdly, on a separate incident later, years later, because this feud went on for about four years, five years, every time we see each other, it was like we'd start having a row not fighting, but to it he called my mum a cunt.

00:49:27:21 – 00:49:47:05
Oh my lord. Yeah, because he was riding on his bicycle and he nearly knocked her over in the road and he called her a cunt as he drove past. And I chased him, chased him down the road. But he's on a bike, so he ran away. Anyway, one time I caught him, we went to was going to a garden like an allotment sale.

00:49:47:07 – 00:50:10:04
That's seven selling plants in Salford was last and I think that was Sunday. If I can see him then I had nowhere for him to go. He's gone on this, pathway. We could have gone. He could have gone off across the path, but I think probably didn't want to seem like such a pussy. So anyway, as he comes, fucking hit him as hard as I could, but, well, fuck it.

00:50:10:04 – 00:50:34:15
What on off? You just. There wasn't any no words. You call my mum this, you shut our back. But you just on site. What up? No, no, it. Yes, but but but I hadn't seen him since he'd call my mum a cunt. We'd moved house by that point. And years had gone past between that first incident to this moment.

00:50:34:17 – 00:50:54:00
Fuck. So was an out of the out of the blue wallet? No, he was looking. We knew something was gonna happen. I thought, well, he's going to he's going to go for me. So I want to go for him first. Went down to smashed him a fucking cunt. Pulled out a knockout Asda. No word of a lie. Oh my god.

00:50:54:00 – 00:51:14:07
Oh my. Oh fuck. If he hits me. What? I'm I'm. Yeah. But luckily after a bit of a scuffle, we people broke it up and that was that. And I had to call police, had to go even interview incitement saying assault. But he didn't press charges. It was more of like a fight anyway. So it was okay in the end.

00:51:14:07 – 00:51:41:22
But yeah, the knuckle duster, that's the last thing. Okay. If I know that stuff, he's got a knockout duster. It's horrible. For a bit of been by that. And then another time before that, there was, was coming back from a call from a fight in, Oh, O2, and we couldn't get home because it's getting away from the O2 is a nightmare.

00:51:41:22 – 00:52:02:04
Remember, mouse? We lived in north London. It was miles from Greenwich. Which on his boss. I'm with my brother. It's the only time I've lost my mind in a in a rage. Wow. You know this story as well, right? You must be. Ros was on this geezer, belligerent and drunk. On this bus passes. Pats kept spitting. Oh, yeah?

00:52:02:04 – 00:52:26:24
And we were sitting a, you know, London busses. There's well above the wheel arch. There are seats are elevated. Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're sitting in there and the bloke spitting and he spat on my brother. Jesus, Ros. Ros, just turn around. Fucking lamp. Tim. Lamp. Tim I've never seen Ros in a fire ever, ever. Like he's. Yeah, he's like me, quite laid back.

00:52:27:01 – 00:52:47:11
He's lamb. Tim. I've gone mental. Didn't actually get near the guy because Pat's. But I'd lost my mind. I'd lost it completely. And, But Ros had done it all. One punch was, That was a bad one. You know, we're talking about regret, and I'm not. One is hurt people like we were talking afterwards, and he was I hated that.

00:52:47:11 – 00:53:03:13
I hated that so much. So it was horrible. And I was I was horrible. I kept the jet plane over my head. Ready. Yeah. And know. Oh, because it could have been worse. I could have fucking died. I mean, he could have fractured his skull. Anything could have happened. You. That's that's that's the thing for me at the moment.

00:53:03:15 – 00:53:25:05
That much the time of my life where I am at the moment, I don't want any of this to ever be taken away from me. So I have to protect that. And by not doing something silly, I. I'd rather get filled in, than go to prison, actually. Yeah, yeah, well, don't want to get filled in, but no, I was about to go backtrack on that.

00:53:25:05 – 00:53:45:19
I said, I won't get fucking filled in. I would fucking throw down with the next man, you know? I mean, but I will do anything to avoid it because I don't want to potentially got to prison or, you know, that there is just that you can't someone they go down, they hit their head and it's the whole reason that fighting scares me so much.

00:53:45:21 – 00:54:14:16
He's like, when I was about 13, 14, my older cousin Andrew, he was killed in a fight, I tell you, remember a day? Yeah. So I know how fragile human beings are and how fragile our skull is. And he got into a fight, and he was in a coma for a few days, and then they, you know, he was dead and knowing that a friend or someone who's close to you is your family member, get into that situation.

00:54:14:18 – 00:54:40:03
Me and the first, the you see the damage it does to their family and also, you know how fragile people are. So you want to avoid that at all costs. So it's you. Yeah. If you're still fighting in your mid-forties. Yeah. You need to have a look at yourself when it goes down. Go and box. Go to lunch box or something if you still want to.

00:54:40:03 – 00:55:09:18
Yeah, yeah. Put your, put your, aggression into that. So to kind of round this bit off, if you are just like 5%, if you're, if you're, you're more or not near our age and it does come on top on in the pop or whatever, always kicking off anything like that. Just try and avoid it. Just try to kind of just buy that person a pint, apologize, whatever it is, do whatever you can to enjoy your night out.

00:55:09:18 – 00:55:41:14
If someone pushes in the queue, they, they push in the queue. Whatever. You don't need to start mouthing off. You're going to fucking give him a ring or whatever. Just let it, you know, water off a duck's back or whatever. Just be careful out there, man, because you never know what is going to happen. Flav yeah, I have got probably I'm going to say it's joint top joint top of something.

00:55:41:14 – 00:56:14:23
Only, you know, really it is a fucking with firecracker. Be doing it okay. We we're going to go now straight into things and you know. No no straight not h straight into it. We got we've got a dilemma. One dilemma. Could should should I be watching this. Yeah. And two of things on a you know taxi touch up and you have to try everything once or twice.

00:56:15:00 – 00:56:38:11
Okay. Just want to say topic for next week. Heartbreak. Have you ever been through heartbreak. Have you been through multiple heartbreaks? How did you get over being the heartbreaker? You being the heartbreaker? Were you a bastard? Were you a bit of a wee bit of a coachman and. And broke loads of hearts as you, as you went along.

00:56:38:12 – 00:56:59:05
Just. Yeah, let us know. But we've had three emails this week of people saying I've got a topic. Can you do heartbreak? How do I get over heartbreak? This is a lot of fucking. That's a broken heart for cunts. And let me, just on that have been terms of breaking people's hearts. Someone I know for an acquaintance I didn't know them as.

00:56:59:07 – 00:57:21:12
They're not friends. They. He went to a festival, caught chlamydia, came back, gave his missus chlamydia. Oh. Then said found out that he had chlamydia and then blamed his misses for cheating. Oh my God. Horrendous. That is bloody horrendous. Instead of like. And she knew she had. So she knew he had. So you just saw what kind of person he was.

00:57:21:14 – 00:57:50:06
Oh man. Man. So if you got anything for heartbreak send it in to lads and on pod at gmail.com and we will share your stories. Now we're going to go on to dilemmas. So I'll just tell you got an issue for a tissue. You're a bit sad cause I will give you a can in your soul alone in your flat.

00:57:50:10 – 00:58:11:04
Please talk to Ricky a flat bed. Let that stress off your chest. Well, friend, you deserve to live like you're safe here to get nice warm between Ricky. Then.

00:58:11:06 – 00:58:35:01
Should I be watching this? I was late in losing my virginity due to being awkward in high school and spending my university years pursuing a woman who turned out to be a lesbian. In brackets. Different story. Anyway, summer 2017 here. And I finally have a match on Tinder with a cute girl from Thailand called Annie who's over here for summer work study.

00:58:35:03 – 00:58:56:08
We met up and she had her some camera angles to take some way off our. Anyway, it's it's not a full on catfish. She's still cute enough. So I continue with the day. We end up getting some fro yo and come back to my place where after a little bit we do the deed. Everyone talks about doing the deed.

00:58:56:10 – 00:59:16:14
It's nice I say this, this is a day afterwards we agreed that a summer fling would be great. In my mind I think it'd be perfect. A summer fun with plenty of fucking and no long term commitment. A she had to leave the country at the end of a work study, basically a practice girlfriend. It started out great.

00:59:16:19 – 00:59:52:22
I got all the sex I desired and then some. She was a real semen demon. She'd cook for me, give me massages, and give me great head. To this day, the best blowjob I've ever gotten was from her immediately after Spurs lost one two to Chelsea. However, as the summer wore on, she became more attached. She started calling me husband, would have me talk to her family who didn't speak English and I certainly don't speak Thai and eventually tried to get me to have sex with her without a condom multiple times.

00:59:52:24 – 01:00:17:14
Fortunately, I was smart enough not to do that every time after sex. After every time after we'd have sex, I'd feel the condom with the water and squeeze to make sure there were no leaks. It's like you shouldn't have it. Yeah, I know I should have ended things there, but of course I didn't because the relationship had a natural expiration date.

01:00:17:16 – 01:00:41:15
Also, sex. The day before I dropped her off at the airport, we go into the city and she tells me she's late. I begin to panic, start looking up abortion laws in Thailand. Well, fortunately she gets her period. Later that day, she told me she wants to try a long distance relationship because she loves me. Oh, the next year I got a text.

01:00:41:17 – 01:01:00:09
It's from Annie. She got back into the country and she wants to meet up. I tell her no and and not to contact me again on a block a number. A couple months later, I get a message from a new account on Facebook and it's her. She tells me she got married and is pregnant. A block her again.

01:01:00:11 – 01:01:38:10
My future wife snoops her. Her main account finds that she's overstayed her visa, met a sailor and married him after two months. Now there's a lot of back and forth with Ali. She makes Facebook accounts, follows him, wants to meet up. He blocks her. This goes on for a couple of years. Looking back, I feel like she was angling to get a green card or an anchor baby to stay in the country, even after we agreed from the beginning that it was just short term is left me feeling used, and what should have been a pleasant memory of some of the summer romance was sullied.

01:01:38:12 – 01:02:05:13
Now, when I'm searching up porn using NordVPN, of course I like watching videos where Thai women are pumped and dumped like cream pie. Times sake, I don't enjoy anything like rape or abuse. That's good. Just Thai women treated slightly poorly. I sometimes feel bad. I like a sociopath for enjoying that content, but it is what it is.

01:02:05:15 – 01:02:12:17
Does this make me a bad person? Am I a baddie? Should I stop watching it?

01:02:12:19 – 01:02:42:08
This. That was a long, very long winded way of. Yeah, tell us that you're watching some dubious porn. But there's there's I think there might be a few people out there that watch Dubai 100%, 100%. There are stuff that people are watching. What you said, why do you think you want to say anything you want to say? I don't think there's anything in my back catalog that, you know, search history that is immensely embarrassing.

01:02:42:10 – 01:03:04:03
That's not something I want my mum to see. But no, I'm not. Yeah, not. I'd, I'd, I'd, I'd back myself not to be seen as a bit of a freak. Yeah. I'm all right. I think it doesn't take much. And you know, my years of watching that stuff is, you know, in the past, I would say I like when people and they email in and I'm glad they do.

01:03:04:05 – 01:03:25:13
They name check porn stars I have no idea about. Yeah. I'm not a single one. No, we've got a couple make a couple of mates who, you know, sideways burping and me and, you know, I try to stifle that, but because the book went in my mouth, like my mustache bulged out. Yeah. Yeah. So, yeah.

01:03:25:13 – 01:04:04:06
You can't get away. You can't. I. I'll always find you, a what are we saying? Sorry about the, about what is watching about porn, I think. Look, your it's weird. Your what? Your your sexual proclivities and what you find a turn on, I think are based on experiences and based on situations and and while it's, you know that the fact that that porn is being made meant that there was a victim there, right there.

01:04:04:07 – 01:04:29:20
I'm sure these women don't want to be degraded in on camera. I'm convinced of that. And they're probably damaged in some way that led them to be in that situation. Yeah. Are you saying he's feeding the feed in the machine? As long as there's no as long as no one's hurt like I could be. Well, I mean, yeah, I don't look like I.

01:04:29:22 – 01:05:03:09
What do you what? He should he stop? I mean, he's I think as long as he doesn't start pursuing this in real life. Yeah. I don't tell anyone. Yeah, yeah, I just, I think, I mean, if that's what he's. If that's his jam, then what can you do? He's not going to stop busy. But then I, we could say, hey, those he does if they're good, it's that if pedophiles have any an ounce of decency in them, they don't go and do what they need to want to do, do they?

01:05:03:09 – 01:05:25:05
So I I'm not calling him pedo. I'm saying there's parallels. I mean, there are in that he's attracted to something that is could potentially hurt someone is, is an issue. But may who am I to tell you what to do? Just watch it. Don't tell anyone. And you know, live your life. Yeah. Enjoy your day. Enjoy your day.

01:05:25:07 – 01:05:54:22
And that is the only dilemma we have this week. If you have any more dilemmas and you want us to answer them, send them in, lads. And on pod at gmail.com. John Herrick single again. Fuck yes I do. Okay, so, just you got an issue for a tissue? You're a bit sad, cause I will give you a I can in your soul, alone in your flat.

01:05:55:02 – 01:06:15:12
Please talk to Ricky a flat bed. Let that stress off your chest. Well, friend, get the fuck you like. You're safe here to get nice warm between Ricky. Then.

01:06:15:14 – 01:06:38:20
We're going to be going on to, something I need, you know. Yeah, I'm just sick. The first one is the short one. Taxi. Touch up, and then we're going to go to. You have to try everything once or twice, which is I mean, this is five star. Is it about five star? Let's get the jingle going for something only, you know, something.

01:06:38:22 – 01:07:06:09
You, you know, you. Taxi! You touch up. Right. That's automatic downloader. A good lad. Brilliant. Good lad. So after a night out clubbing many moons ago, I found myself waiting for a cab on my own. The key for the cab rank was quite long, as you would expect. At around 2 a.m. whilst in the queue I got chatting to a girl in front of me.

01:07:06:11 – 01:07:30:17
We were both quite drunk and as the chat continued, one thing led to another and I end up, necking on with her, necking on with her, normally necking her neck. Normal back. And that's cool. She then leads me away by the hand, away from the taxi rank to a nearby alley. Yeah. Next thing you know, we are both fumbling around with each other's under carriages there.

01:07:30:19 – 01:07:59:07
The carriages on the way of her way, high leading up. Leads in a person to an alleyway. Yes. And the carriages? I we then somehow ended in the middle of a nearby roundabout, which was surrounded by a lot of trees and bushes, so you couldn't see into it. She then proceeded to give me a blowie, and I ended up giving her one doggy style, even though one dog, you know, like.

01:07:59:09 – 01:08:21:02
Now you might be thinking what a lad. But I knew I had only just started seeing my now wife at the time, with the reality and shame of what I had done to this girl, I pulled up my grass stained jeans and left there. That was my only one night stand and I never saw the girl again. That's it.

01:08:21:04 – 01:08:53:00
So that he he. So he did the start of his relationship with his now wife. Yeah, he sort of did a cheat. Yeah. A dog, a dog in an alleyway. Yeah. Pretty for you, mate. Yeah, yeah. You, I think the the undercarriage fondling alleyway. Doggy style roundabout. Roundabout? Yeah. It was on a roundabout. Good. Yeah.

01:08:53:02 – 01:09:14:00
What this is what this is, is for is this sort of thing. This is a place where you can get things off your chest, get it off your chest. Feel better about it, and then never think about it again. Exactly, exactly. Or do it again. Never tell anyone. If you want. Do it again. Go to that roundabout. Go and find the roundabout.

01:09:14:03 – 01:09:36:24
What's stopping you? Nothing. Go back to that roundabout. Take off and send it to us. I want to see the roundabout. Yeah, right. We're going to go into this one I've built. I have built this up a bit, but I have, the feeling you're going to enjoy it anyway. Yes. You have to try everything once or twice to set the scene.

01:09:36:24 – 01:10:00:19
A load of mates from home had come just out of my uni house, which is made up of four other mates from home who all ended up going to the same uni. So it was a big catch up with plenty of drinks, drugs and poker between close friends. Finally, everyone leaves for Christmas after a few great nights, leaving just me and another very close mate from home.

01:10:00:21 – 01:10:31:01
This mate was the one I played Xbox with, and we had hundreds of late night calls over the years chatting away while playing online. Often these talks ended up being about girls and sex and being horny teenagers. As night approached and it was just me and my mate, I got excited to have one of our classic chats. I had a weird feeling it wasn't like looking forward to a few beers, watching a game with a mate was like sort of exciting you'd have before a date with a girl you're into.

01:10:31:03 – 01:10:54:00
And the fuck, I didn't fancy him, I didn't, and I still don't. I don't fancy boys. I thought about it and realized I've been programed by hundreds of late night, one on one convos about sex with this mate to get horny and at the thought of him I got horny again. What the fuck? The night passes and the drink flows.

01:10:54:00 – 01:11:20:24
The chat goes exactly as I expected and I'm hard as a rock. More drink flows. We ended up watching porn projected on the living room wall, and I joke about having a wank. Before Sasha Gray had her bra off, my mate and I had our cocks out in a drunk haze by then. Remember getting naked, crawling over between my mates legs and putting his cock in my mouth?

01:11:21:01 – 01:11:53:02
I must have been on my knees for 30 minutes giving him a blowjob that would rival Nancy Regan in brackets. Googly. Anyway, he lets out the poison I swallow and we watch about two hours of people having funny accidents on YouTube. It's mad to think about and we've never spoken about it since. You might be thinking, wait a minute, this isn't something only you know because your mate knows and you'd be right.

01:11:53:04 – 01:12:18:06
The only I know is a month later, after having 1 or 2 cheeky wankers thinking about that random night, I thought I'd get grinder and see if I like doing it again. I didn't want anyone to know, so I waited to find the perfect stranger who I knew I could keep a complete secret. I fine one and end up meeting him in a Novotel car park.

01:12:18:08 – 01:12:40:07
He's not like his face and about a foot shorter than me, older than I thought, 55 to 60 and looked a bit of a nerd. It's too late now though. I'm too polite. I follow him into his room. I'm paranoid about him secretly filming, so I ask if I could blow him in the bathroom where I'm hoping there is no camera.

01:12:40:09 – 01:13:01:11
20 minutes later, a man old enough to be my granddad bellows, is so yellowed from his three inch penis into my mouth, which I promptly spat in the sink and left no more cock for me. Now the end.

01:13:01:13 – 01:13:25:04
Did it really end with no more cock? No more cock for me? Yeah. He's had is that he's had one try. He's had a second try. It's not for him, it's not for him. That is fantastic. That play I mean like yeah I like the fact I got to find out every year it was just his mate that he fancies.

01:13:25:06 – 01:13:48:10
Well I don't know. I don't know if he fancies mate. I think maybe it was the whole chat. Because he's my guy. I don't think he's my. Is it. It's my he hasn't he hasn't said that he's not listed. That is. And he says he's not gay. So I don't know I think maybe he's bi. Maybe. Maybe he's just testing.

01:13:48:16 – 01:14:09:07
Every single year my daughters say to me, dad, you hate olives. Try one. You might like it this year. I put it in my mouth. Hate it, I taste it, it's horrible. And I'm like, I'm not doing that again. Then the next year they do the same. This guy had a cock in his mouth in the night air.

01:14:09:09 – 01:14:33:01
If that's interesting, I try it again. And just like that olive, it was so a and he didn't like it. I said, I like the fact. I like the fact that he was too polite and not the keys. It's cock it. This guy is definitely from Britain 100%. Yeah. You can tell just the way he's speaking. I mean, you maybe.

01:14:33:03 – 01:15:04:08
I think you should try again. Third time lucky. Third time's a charm. I passed my driving test on my third time, so maybe three is the magic number. Yeah. So where do you want? Yeah, try. Try it again. My thing. There's a lot of a lot of, Sexuality is a gray area, isn't it? Yeah. Let me take enough cocaine that that's clear.

01:15:04:10 – 01:15:28:22
No. But seriously, sexuality is for loads of people. Is is very, very gray area. It's not binary at all. And what you like, you know, it may or may not be different sexes that you like, but you your taste in things changes and develops as you get older. Like to me, I can't. I don't understand why men want to be humiliated by like a dominatrix, but it's a massive.

01:15:28:24 – 01:15:48:06
Yeah, the the cock thing. I, I cannot get my head around it or like dogging, like. Yeah. Is that the same way you just watch people in a local park? Yeah. So we should meet in. In. I don't mean you can. Or is it just. Or is it just people meeting up? Yeah, it's just meeting up for sex.

01:15:48:06 – 01:16:05:19
You can smash other people's misses. Oh, okay. It doesn't have to be your missus. No. Cocks are very different. Thing is, is about someone, right? And your wife and you watching get into a number. Yeah, I yeah, that's just I can't I genuinely couldn't think. I don't even want to I don't want to have this conversation really.

01:16:05:19 – 01:16:28:17
But but but but my point is, is that people didn't, weren't born wanting to do that. It just developed from somewhere like this. That guy wants to not not went out to Filipino porn. Yeah. Filipino Thai tie Thai. Yeah. Women being sort of mistreated. So it's, it's a slightly mistreated slightly. Slightly. Yeah. Slightly. Like they stop their toes and not help.

01:16:28:22 – 01:16:53:02
That's more for him than it is for us. Yeah. Mate, you know, it might be. It might. You've probably. I mean, that doesn't sound very, That sounds horrendous. Meeting someone in a Novotel car park and being smaller, you know, not looking like him, being older, like 55 to 60, and then you just terrified of being filmed.

01:16:53:04 – 01:17:17:01
So. So you want to suck him off in the toilet? Oh that is, you made a lot of bad decisions there. Yeah. There is, there is a lot. And, try again there again. My biggest don't give up is, I'd say, left nothing good. Nothing good comes from giving up, does it? So no, the try again is all I'm asking.

01:17:17:03 – 01:17:32:14
Let us know this week and try again this weekend. But I ask the same place out to the dinner chain.

01:17:32:16 – 01:17:48:08
Oh. I haven't hit record. Well, I didn't hit record on the whole podcast. Yeah.

01:17:48:10 – 01:18:20:18
And jacking. You fucking prick. Yeah, I'm still recording. I'm still recording. Oh, my God, I can't believe it. It's, going to cry. I think he's going to cry. Oh, God. The night hazy light. Band of brothers playing tunes. He's quite midnight. Waves surfing through till daylight breaks. Rhythm hit us different ways. Love of music I we prayed with our tongues in cheek.

01:18:20:18 – 01:18:29:13
Band is I, we like to speak and yeah, times change. But no matter what the bond remains. Brothers.