#2 | Friends Pt.2

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Are the Night. Hazy like Band of Brothers playing tones high is quite midnight. Waves surfing through till daylight breaks rhythm. Here's different ways. Love of music are. We prayed with our tongues in cheek. Band aside, we like to speak. And yeah, times change. But no matter what the bond remains. Brothers, hello and welcome to The Lads Anonymous, a podcast where two best mates of over 20 years invite you to join their safe space where all manner of subjects will be discussed.

00:00:34:18 – 00:00:59:20
We'll focus on a specific subject matter first, which will lead into your questions, dilemmas or need for advice. All handled anonymously. That is the fun stuff. That's where we always want to go. That's what they want. Credit for the part. What if they want credit? Do you know what that's actually happened? But people have emailed in and said, I don't give a fuck if you use my name or not.

00:00:59:22 – 00:01:20:04
Put it out there. I thought, whoa, whoa whoa whoa whoa whoa. I don't give a fuck. I say, have you read the premise of the podcast? It's all anonymous. Just just, you know, I think you might feel safe. This is our safe space. And then, like, the safe space is my surname. This is where I work, so. Oh, hey.

00:01:20:06 – 00:01:38:19
Is has a g t he says, Christ, what, are we going to go into some of that then. Well, yeah. What's the decision. What's the decision we use their names are not no no no no I, I've not, not use their names. But if they want to put their location that's that that's fine. What about first name and location.

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Do you remember like they did the address and. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. From Coventry. Yeah. Okay. We could do that. I don't mind that, but do you know, as a kid, I think you're from a from a small place, like a small town. Everyone knows, Steven from fucking Weymouth. Yeah. So the you get, you get done, like.

00:02:04:05 – 00:02:27:07
So when I was a kid, right. I used to look at these, these anonymous the these, these, these these problems. But it's, it's an into the elegy and a lot of them would be anon. It would just say anon. Yeah, that's a weird name in it. And no, no, there's a lot of anon. Why more, I've never come across a nun before.

00:02:27:09 – 00:02:51:03
Never one. That's a book there's loads of a known for his name, let's say Sidney Sussex. I would say into my adulthood, I felt that. I thought that that's that's that's quite, that's quite key today and none the fuck you know. Well, I'm not make there's, there's loads of things have, like, like that that I've done over the years.

00:02:51:03 – 00:03:12:06
I can't, I can't think of them at the moment, but. Yeah, that's So, Magnus, have you seen that fucking news that I was just walking out in the kitchen? But radio is playing, and, is it the British Army saying that if we go to war with Russia, they're going to start recruiting us, not you. Okay.

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Why not me? 200 years? Oh, yeah. We're out, mate, for Iran. Yeah.

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You 41. Yes. We win. Yeah, yeah yeah, yeah. Nothing to worry about it. Nothing to worry about. I mean, man, it's all the sort of kids that I gotta worry. Anything like I n is where you're at, right? 18 to 30. You're in, the firing line. Yeah. Fuck that. I don't want there to be a conscription, but if there is, I'd rather them go than me.

00:03:41:19 – 00:04:00:23
Yeah, and the cutoff is for a. So I guess what are we going to do on a battlefield? Rick would be terror, mate. I'm fucking. I'm over like, now. Can you imagine, like Rick? Well, we got a day today, mate. I'm fucking well, I know, can we not do this tomorrow? It's like. Yeah, no, no, no, the Russians are coming to my.

00:04:00:23 – 00:04:19:01
We've got there. Do you remember when I was this? This always makes me laugh, though. Back in the day when we used to get, like, bait and watch, bandit Brothers, and we'd always say, what would we do if we were. Yeah. In there. And what do we say? Like to play dead? Yeah. That that's the only thing.

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What would you do? Is I. Anyone that hasn't seen Battle Brothers is an amazing because some people might know it's quite 20 years old now, right? Yeah. It's. Yeah. Band of brothers is an amazing HBO Steven Spielberg, Tom Hanks production. Right. If you loved Saving Private Ryan, Band of Brothers, which was like the next logical step. Yeah, me and Rick watched it late back in the stoned up one, six, eight western part days and,

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Yeah. And we that's the conversation. What would you do? Just you'd have to play dead. We'd be we all of us would be. Who's the guy who goes blind? Life. Life. Yeah, yeah, we'd be blind. Yeah yeah, yeah. Like. Yeah. And you guys blind because he's so scared. Yeah, exactly. Hit my head off. Do you think he. He actually went blind or.

00:05:05:07 – 00:05:24:05
He just told people he was. So we had this conversation way back then. I remember it, and I was quite not at the time quite annoyed with you, Rick, because you when he's, he's like, he's, he's in he's he's faking. He's, he's a weakling like my granddad would never have done that kind of attitude. And I'm like Rick terrified.

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And then that's why he's gone blind. He thinks he's going to die like thousands of miles away from home on the other side. That's why he's gone blind. And you're like, nah. Now that, you know, I, I work at Moorfields. All the hospital I know about, I.

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Yeah. But I, I think out of the, I mean, I'd like to think of more Lieutenant Spears.

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No, there's no fucking way, man. Absolutely no. Why? I ain't got that about me. No. You know, I know I'm blind, and, you live now. I don't think you'd be blind, but I would be that. I am definitely that guy that, Like, if it was World War two, I'm sent off 1939. And then I come back to England, 1945 looking like a scout leader.

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I've got badges all over my arms, loads of medals that I have one. And that's because in every single, war or battle, I just play dead and then waited for waiting for it to be. I ever got up, see the person that's alive and be like, oh, got to be saints, Terry. Yeah, it's a shame, innit?

00:06:34:16 – 00:06:58:17
You're saying that you saying David? Yeah. He's fucking gone as well as two lads. We're still together and I'm just like getting all these. Yeah, loads. I met a champ about stages falling down and I've got all these fucking medals from hiding. I want to do nothing. You contribute? Yeah, yeah. For the war effort. I know I have to take that to my grave.

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Yeah, that's that's probably what I'd be. Just play dead. Can I just. Because I worked out something shocking this morning, so I'm quite a creature of habit. And I decided, a while back, that poached eggs on toast was my thing. Yeah, but I leave work early. Got. I got to get the kids to school, I and work started.

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Get to the office around about nine. So I've got a little window where I can just have a bit of me time. I'll go to the caf and I'll have three poached eggs on granary. Oh, so much so that I think they think of me as the poached eggs guy.

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I don't like the order. They see me come in and they know what I want, which is poached egg.

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That's what they say. Petite. Do you have anything else? No, just my poached eggs, please. I don't like it. I don't feel comfortable, but I don't want to have an English breakfast just because they're making fun of me. Like I'm 42. I'm going to get what I want for breakfast. And I want three poached eggs on granary.

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I don't want to be bullied into getting a fucking fried breakfast. Not healthy. Right? Psychopath. Yeah, but I am. I haven't finished the list. I go just quickly call it cos 10.90 pound a time.

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For fucking free poached eggs. Daylight granary, daylight robbery innit. I'll keep going back. You get a tea with that. Yeah, I'll keep going back. It's still tea constituted cos about £0.10 a tea bag. Hot water. Fuck me. Expensive idiot. Listen to me, Rick. I've done that every day for a month. Do you know how much I've spent on poached eggs this month?

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Oh my God, I've spent 200. About £220 in one month on poached eggs on toast. Where if it's. Hey, that's me. So, you fascinate me. That's how you. That's not a joke, Rick. I've spent 200 pounds on poached eggs on toast. This, this. But this month.

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I'm actually lost one. Can you believe that? If someone said to me. If someone said to me, if someone said to you, right, I want 200 pounds of you, but I'm gonna give you poached eggs every morning. No one's doing that. No. Even if you reg that, you doing that. For you and so. So fuck yeah. It's realization.

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I told the wife and she was looking at me, I was insane, and I'm like, I know you're right. You should be fucking furious with me. You should be furious with me. I've wasted 200 pounds because. Because I want poached eggs in the morning. That's crazy. Who's spending 200 pounds on poached eggs? No one is that. It's David Beckham.

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I'm doing that.

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Crazy. What are you my thinking about? And it wasn't. It was a slow realization. It wasn't a deliberate thing. It was a slow realization of, fucking crazy, man. That's crazy. So I made myself scrambled eggs. This one said, that is, Yeah. Watch me rocking out. Okay, I, I mean, like, when you when you come in and, I wouldn't be judgy about the poached eggs.

00:10:09:02 – 00:10:30:05
It's the granary. I've got it right. Here we go. Granary. Beanie hat. Look at him. He's one of those boys. What you want from a oat milk in your frappuccino? What? What's white toast is bad for you doing it. Yeah. Oh, I know, but you gotta live a little man like you've got this. We're going to be conscripted to the army soon.

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Fucking. I'm not. I'm not spending £200 on white bread.

00:10:35:16 – 00:11:06:07
Okay. Yeah, that's that's it for the face as well, right? Yeah. What are we talking about this week? I'm going to get to that. Sorry. I just actually, I want to say every single person that has followed us on Insta, on Twitter, or subscribed on Apple, so many people followed us on Spotify, sent an email as I cannot be like, literally, I cannot believe how many people have my icon on all of that.

00:11:06:07 – 00:11:32:19
It's it is wild. Let's not say let people be honored for food. For a second we was the yeah, like we said. Well, what would be good in terms of how many listens. So we were gone, but 300 400 would be happy. Yeah. Absolutely. Bliss. Smash. Smash. Yeah. Which is man, I know a lot of you people. I know you're listening to this and you're like, oh, it's just another person that's just gone.

00:11:32:19 – 00:12:00:16
On a subscriber follow and gone about your day. But I can't tell you how much that means to us. Obviously, as the first episode of the pod, it's amazing. And obviously, getting us up in the Apple, podcast charts as well, which for the comedy podcast, we were number 17, which is like, if I was 199 out of the 200 list, I would have been ecstatic.

00:12:00:17 – 00:12:23:10
Yeah. So it's amazing. Thank you so much. Thank you everyone. I love you all. We are, this isn't a question from one of the lads is more of, just, letting us know. So last week we were talking about mates. Or friends, to be more specific. And it was about how we first met Flav on, a chat forum.

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A football one. Yeah. And and this lad says, take pride in the fact that you met on the internet when I was 17. I spent a lot of time in the Dawson's Creek chat room. I was seduced in there by a 29 year old nutter who offered to break my virginity and teach me everything I needed to know in the bedroom.

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Oh, my God, I, she was she was a solid five out of ten. Should be shouldn't be doing numbers, but I appreciate I love this stadium if I let her. And that's from Western Australia. But we need more information. That is that story does not end there.

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So you're and the Dawson's Creek, Dawson's Creek chat room. Oh, my. That's I remember that. I remembered, like, being in chat rooms. I love the bit a little chat room, and it was all just like teenagers trying to get off of each other and in these chat rooms. Yeah, yeah, smashing is all over the place, mate. Can I get to you an admission?

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I'll admit something for this podcast only if only. Oh, okay. Yeah, I've only always anonymous, but I'm okay. I literally don't give a fuck anymore. Right? My. One of my first girlfriends, when I was about 16 or 17, I met her in a chat room on the internet. Her name was Katie. Oh, yeah? Yeah, on a Capital One chat room during a Capital One, the radio station.

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Oh my God. Oh one yes, we did eat them. That I don't know, it was just I was browsing the internet. It was very different back then and I was just maybe listening to Capital One Radio and actually then that is a chat room and.

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I've gone, I've gone, I've gone in there and I've started chatting to this bird. And she was like, what you look like? And I was like, well, I had really long hair back then, like long, long, long hair. And I was like, have you seen the band Hanson? She's like, yeah, I love Hanson. So yeah, like the lead singer of Hanson I did, to be fair, I did.

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It wasn't like, yeah, you did. I've seen the eyes, but pop it up and it done it for her. And we met up. We met up, man. We we choose my girlfriend. She stayed at my mum's house. Everything went really well. Yeah, we went out for about six months. Did a bit of dry humping, nice goods, a bit of dry goods.

00:14:45:04 – 00:15:06:24
Better than sex in some ways. Yeah. Well, good. Well, it just run. What was that about? What about when you was when you and your team just rutting against each other? Yeah. It's weird in it. Yeah. Did you do that? Yeah. I did that with my, my current Mrs.. Because it's like you don't want to have sex for you.

00:15:06:24 – 00:15:32:00
Super horned up. Yeah, I know it's it's it's a weird one in it that you are too simple. Hold up. Be. Just think. I don't know, I just just I'm not that just a sex. Yeah, well, I want to rub. I want to rub my cock through my jeans. On your leg. Yeah, exactly. And, play my beans and pretend I didn't play my beans.

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Yeah. And, And just act as everything's normal. Yeah. Just blow your beans in your jeans.

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That's quite good, actually. I want to get that on a t shirt.

00:15:48:13 – 00:16:09:09
Hey, we the. Not going to wear blow my beans in my jeans much? If there's anyone out there, let me let us know. If you want us to produce merch, we can do it. We can do. Do you know how to do it right? Yeah. We can produce merch. Yeah, if you want. Blow my. Blow my beans in my jeans on a t shirt.

00:16:09:10 – 00:16:18:10
We will make it for you. I will do it. If only one person fucking buys it and wears it. Okay.

00:16:18:12 – 00:16:46:14
That one person is going to be me, you know? And I'll happily, happily wear that t shirt. Today's topic. Oh, yeah. It's. Today's topic is friends part two. I know, yeah, I know, it's, like, it was very much about our relationship. I just wanted to kind of set the, the foundation of what the podcast is about, who we are as people, how we met.

00:16:46:14 – 00:17:11:19
And if anyone wants to know, go back to episode one. And if you listen to this now, why don't you go back to episode one anyway and have a listen? Because it's fucking great. So just do that. So what we're going to do, we're just going to get into the latter stages of our lives at the moment, being 41 and 42, how do you feel about new friendships at the moment?

00:17:11:21 – 00:17:32:16
Like are you actively seek connection from other men or women? I don't know. Are you just do you know what, your wife is the only woman that I say that I've got a legitimate friendship with. But we don't talk very often now because she moved away. She took you away than she. And that was that. But.

00:17:32:18 – 00:17:58:02
Yeah, but I would say when we was out in London, your missus, I would consider a genuine friend. But. Yeah. Yeah. I don't have any other friends. Female. They're all men. She she said that, she listened to the first part. And the way that you were talking about the your relationship, and she said she got a bit teared up.

00:17:58:04 – 00:18:22:10
Yeah. There were great days. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, exactly. There were times where we would be out in like the Queen's head in, in, in Essex Road and I. Yeah. Near Angel. Me and your wife just under the influence dancing having a great time like not. Yeah. And that's the thing is like I genuinely believe that most male and female relationships are dominated by a sexual tension.

00:18:22:10 – 00:18:46:17
The man wants to fuck the woman, right? Always. Yeah. You don't know. Know right now. This is this is this is interesting. I wasn't even going to bring this question into it. But what I will do is, as you've read on to it, we have had a question previously on and it can, a man befriends a woman.

00:18:46:18 – 00:19:21:13
Actually. Can men and women be friends? Yeah, they can be friends. But they must realize. They must know and accept the underlying. There's an underlying fact that typically in most instances. Yeah, the, the I, I'd say the man wants to have sex with a woman, but there are and I'm not saying like necessarily like with my there is luckily in my brain I have this inbuilt barrier where I have never, ever thought about my brothers or my friends girlfriends in that way, like so.

00:19:21:15 – 00:19:46:20
It's so off limits that it's never even entered my brain. So these like what fucking Ryan Giggs data? Rodri, Giggs is unforgivable. Fucking what isn't it like that is in some real. Yeah. Yeah. Absolutely beyond comprehension that you done that. So yeah that instance. But in terms of just meeting a girl, what goes through a man's brain typically is because she's fit or she's not fit.

00:19:46:20 – 00:20:08:20
And that's, that's the first thing typically. Do you think that is as binary is that it starts with that for sure. Yeah. And then and then yeah. You realize if you don't wanna have sex with that, then you could probably be friends. Yeah. Is that what about a crass way to say things? I don't think it's crass, at all.

00:20:08:22 – 00:20:32:24
And I do think you are right in that, but, I have a fair few female friends. Women don't feel like. And, well, like to date. I don't know if they're like. If they are, I don't know. This part is called Lads Anonymous, and it's a safe space, we know, for lads to come and share in the circle of trust.

00:20:32:24 – 00:20:54:17
Yeah, but we know, we know you're listening, girls. Katherine Rupp listens. Shout out Katherine Rupp. She did, she did a little tweaks you can listen to to find out for a long time. Katherine, gave the show and said that she would listen to anything that Ricky's on. Babe. Amazing. Yeah. So, honestly, let us know. Katherine, is that ever a fact?

00:20:54:17 – 00:21:17:08
With girls that I meet a man and he's the first thing in their head. Would I shag that guy? Yeah, that's the I. Yeah, that's really interesting. At the end. I know there were, more ladies that listen as well. How do you know opens. Yeah, because I've seen where they've emailed in. There's a lady, I mean. Wow.

00:21:17:09 – 00:21:23:23
Couple. Can you answer me this question, ladies? Why do you watch gay porn?

00:21:24:00 – 00:21:42:22
While they're watching two men bang. They're loving it. Well, yeah. Is that is that a thing? Yeah. I don't I don't know what Katherine wrapped into, but I can guarantee. I can guarantee at some stage in her life she's popped on a bit of gay porn. And also, I was blown by that. It makes complete sense, isn't it?

00:21:42:22 – 00:22:07:07
Because men look like lesbians. I love lesbians, right? Yeah, I I've, I've also, I've can't remember where I heard this is. Well. But, women, they tend to like porn with noises. It's the noises that get them off. Yeah. I've heard not like the noise of the groaning and the excitement of what's happening in the porn.

00:22:07:07 – 00:22:23:03
Rather, noise of is crosses William and Fanny and like, I don't think it's that noise. No, no. Maybe it might be. I don't know that. Yeah. That's doing it for you, Catherine.

00:22:23:05 – 00:22:52:03
Well, that, the. No, you're right. There's if you if you, if you type it into whatever, you know, porn search engine is your favorite. You type audio, there is audio only. And and it apparently is something that women listen to. I see there is actually an audio only section. Is that. Yeah. I haven't used it, I don't know, but the, the, I know that it exists.

00:22:52:05 – 00:23:14:07
But that doesn't even exist. But that makes sense to me because women are more I would say they are more. They live in their mental, more lonely. And I think more more of the senses. Yeah. Whereas men just need to see something, whereas I think women are more nuanced with it. Yeah, yeah. Like Mad men are like ridiculous.

00:23:14:07 – 00:23:33:02
Like even not even, like sexually visual. You could just say, I don't know, you can just go into the fridge and go and get something and you see a pack of ham, you wait for it and you think, oh, hello, that looks like it. But I never, never thought that. I've never seen a pack of them go. Yes!

00:23:33:06 – 00:24:00:10
No. They're out. I'll have a better. And then just coming into a gob. I don't know how. Knuckle in ham at the fridge. In your gob. You're knuckling ham into your gob, Rick. Good on me? Yeah. That's not the first thing that's happening. Yeah. Yeah. To go back about, men and women being friends, it's,

00:24:00:12 – 00:24:17:05
Yeah, I have a lot of female friends. I know you, and they're there, and it's, I'm. I wait for that. No, there's nothing weird about it. I don't I'm probably incorrect in the way I think about it is reductive, right? I don't know, I'm just an opinion I'm giving. It might not be true. That's just my feed on, typically.

00:24:17:07 – 00:24:48:16
What do you enjoy? Friends. You female friends more than what you get from that, don't they? I mean, what what is it? What is the relationship like with a typical female is it's the same as male, but it's not as what you would find in the lads WhatsApp group. It's not that intense as to be, fully on sexual innuendos, on the horrors of the world, gallows humor, that kind of stuff.

00:24:48:18 – 00:25:08:23
What is it with so it's I don't know, actually. It's exactly the same, like friendship, but it's with a kind of there's a there's more emotion connected to it. You feel more open that you can talk to someone about. I don't know, work issues though it might be I don't want yeah, I know, I know you don't.

00:25:08:23 – 00:25:31:21
I know every time if there is an issue in your life and we're speaking as really good mates you rock with, in a second you're like that, let's switch subjects and that's fine. But then if I go and speak to one of my girl mates and we're we're having a chat, I kind of feel a bit more safe and a bit more like if I do open up that, it's a bit more supportive.

00:25:31:23 – 00:25:51:06
That one's going to go say, oh, that's okay. You know? Not exactly. Exactly. I quite like it. I quite like you going for a, what you're doing now is something I would never consider to do. Like yours. Yeah. After this podcast finishes, you're driving 20 minutes to meet a bird and go for a walk with a. That's right.

00:25:51:06 – 00:26:10:21
Someone I used to work with. Yeah. Yeah, that's a great relationship. Yeah, that for me. That's something I couldn't even ever see myself doing. So. But I'm not saying it's right or wrong. It's just. Isn't it? It's just is just is. Rick. In terms of being a new friend, though. Yeah, I just kind of I've got I've got you guys.

00:26:10:21 – 00:26:30:22
I've got my brothers, as I mentioned, the last episode, but I've got like I do meet people and I find, I think but sometimes you meet people new for like when I met you, you'd think, yes, this works. Yeah. And I'd say, let's say the same with James, and I'd say the same with, most of the boys actually all boys.

00:26:30:22 – 00:26:44:14
Right. But there's, there's some you just meet and you think, you know, this is quality. Yeah. I've had one recently, mate. Okay, well you have. Yeah.

00:26:44:16 – 00:27:03:05
Who? Well, hello. Well, can I just say thank you? Can I just say no one ever comes close to you? You're always going to be, like, one for the rest of my life. Yeah. No one will ever. I will never meet another Ricky. I would never meet another. Ricky nearly said it. Nearly did the other day. I they never gave him a government name then.

00:27:03:05 – 00:27:26:14
Yeah, you little pig. No one gives a shit. No one. Literally no one cares where you work, Rick. No, no. I'm fine. They have your house number. No one's going to lie, though. Testify for humanity. Give you a full address right now? Yeah. He's looking. And. No, no, you're not going to like this. But he's of the same ethnic makeup as you.

00:27:26:16 – 00:27:51:17
Fucking hair. What are you doing to me? Yeah, we agreed 11111 British. Asian one. I'm allowed one Brown, mate. And that's you. That's. Yeah, that's exactly it. Yeah. One brown my. And that's it. Oh, I got another one. His name's Mark. Do you know I've heard you mention them isn't it. How did you find him as well. Isn't this one of my least like the black.

00:27:51:18 – 00:28:05:24
So there's no right away some find a bond between man. Oh, man. Then magic mushrooms in a field of mice. Fucking hell. Yeah. Where does he live? Brighton.

00:28:06:01 – 00:28:11:12
How close is Brighton to? Not close, but I make an effort. See him?

00:28:11:14 – 00:28:30:20
Well, hang on a second. Well, you met him outside of. I mean, you haven't met, and we're ready. I met him, I met him, we not. Not just off we went for. For at least these wedding. He was there. Obviously, I was most excited about him. I was more excited about seeing him again, and I was. Ollie loves him.

00:28:30:22 – 00:28:49:22
Dashing early. Loves him. And, we've arranged to go to Amsterdam. Oh, I'm going to say. Well, the Amsterdam trip that I'm coming on, I'm not coming now. Make you come and you've got to meet him. Your love him. Yeah, I know well. And I'll. I'll fucking stick him in the mud. No you won't, you won't.

00:28:49:22 – 00:28:55:15
You'll love him. Be my two favorite brown mates together.

00:28:55:17 – 00:29:29:14
And he got to talking about, friendship groups. Yeah. Do you have specific friendship groups for specific activities like you've got obviously we've got the Tottenham Tottenham lot in. So here's a case of my group. When I was growing up, I had my first school, middle school, secondary school, sixth form. Those core mates around there, they're named Old Lot.

00:29:29:16 – 00:29:53:10
So it's all the old lot. And as we were growing up in our late teens, 20s and the group started to expand with other people, came into the group that then became New Lot and new Lot High outlaw. Because I've never been out like that. I genuinely hate them. Yeah, yeah, it's not a gender, but there is a bit in the clean.

00:29:53:15 – 00:30:11:10
No, this is what we're looking over. There was roommates. They were all mates. But I'm old, I'm older. I'm better than you. Yeah. I'm older. I'm definitely you. I'll tell you that. You could sense a little bit of tension. When we came for your birthday on the 40th, I think they were all really a bit miffed that they had made the effort to come out for my birthday.

00:30:11:13 – 00:30:30:01
Yeah. And I was like, oh, this is really good. And then I saw all of the flying cock raw and fucking hit the roof and nearly collapsed through love and and they were like, oh, right, I see, I see. Yeah. But they must have been shoulder to shoulder. We've been shoulder to shoulder in Yates's. Yeah, for the last night.

00:30:30:03 – 00:30:43:08
And it was your fault because you overreacted when you saw us. It was awful. You should hold it. Hold it down a little bit. Yeah. I've got a lot of emotion. I know you came out and it was like your face lit up and I was like, oh, that. Because you was like, all right, let's go, let's go.

00:30:43:10 – 00:31:00:00
I, I can understand where it comes from, but I sure, I know that it was a surprise and the fact that we were there, you knew that your mates would be there for you for your surprise party, wouldn't it? Yeah. Yeah, exactly. Actually, I, quick, quick mention, I went out last night. I went to see that.

00:31:00:00 – 00:31:22:22
This is incredible. Actually, I went to see The Libertines, one of my favorite bands. They are playing a, they're doing a tour of local small venue. Yes. We got really small and they played at Milton Keynes, where I lived, to a bar that I go to regularly with my mates, and there was like 300 people there. I managed to get tickets.

00:31:22:22 – 00:31:43:21
It was fucking insane. It was so good. The two lads that I went with, I won't mention their names, but you know them and I mention them. I know them as The Goonies. Yeah, that's. I'll refer to them from now on. Yeah. And they were like, oh, like, well done with the pod. Congratulations. And all that got stuck on.

00:31:43:23 – 00:32:06:10
So the episode title as good friends going to be talking about friends listen for a whole hour. Just wait. One ain't me just waiting for my name, not one to mention. And they said they were fucking livid, so. Oh, you only started living when you were 23 years old. Flat. Was it? Fucking. Thanks. We go. We've been friends since we were five years old.

00:32:06:10 – 00:32:25:24
Yeah, that's why he's outrageous. Cross. I know, I know, and I said to them, like, I didn't want to do something name drop and get people in trouble. And I think if you want your names out there and all that lot, by Goonies, I know you're listening. I apologize for that. But, I also don't apologize because this is the way I wanted to do it.

00:32:26:01 – 00:33:02:19
So you will you will get mentions going forward, and you'll be known as The Goonies. So shut your mouths. All right. What I do want to go on to is something, obviously about friendship, but what is the most you have ever been betrayed as a friend or you've done the betrayal? Do you have any of those instances where you've like, I fucking know I shouldn't have done that, or I should have done that or not?

00:33:02:19 – 00:33:23:22
Have you done that to me? Men. Men don't. They don't get betrayed. That's the thing that happens when women circles, in my opinion. Am I coming across as a misogynist? Yeah. I feel like I might be the, you know, look, mate, like we you can go a year without speaking to your mate, right? If I want. Not that this will happen.

00:33:23:24 – 00:33:55:08
If I went a year without speaking to you. And then I bumped into you in a pub in Milton Keynes. Yeah. A year from now, it would be like. Yeah, not. And not a minute at past. And it would be would fall straight back into whatever it is, our relationship. Absolutely. So and I know I would say that about any one of my male friends, whereas I think, yeah, I think things are so things like betrayal is not possible unless you do something like shag your birds, mate something like that, or steal off them.

00:33:55:08 – 00:34:10:13
Yeah, well, that but I've never done that. Never had that done to me. I've never been betrayed, ever. Not once. I've never cheat. Never. I've never been cheated on. I've never been betrayed. I've never had my heart broken. I've never nothing. I've been quite lucky in that respect. Or lucky or like fucking, you know, looking to save me?

00:34:10:15 – 00:34:26:02
Fucking no, I get heartbroken. Jesus. I had my heart broken. I do the heart breaking. I'm the one that knocks. Let's check. I can't stop saying that. I'm not going to podcast now.

00:34:26:04 – 00:34:47:21
I like it as well. It's good. It's from, It's from what's that film that's a program. But like Breaking Bad when his wife I. You could you could have been killed. You can be killed. This is dangerous. And he goes, who the who do you think you're looking at right now?

00:34:47:23 – 00:35:11:03
I am the danger. I'm the one that knocks. Brilliant. It's like he turns from a schoolteacher into a fucking villain. Although what I would say. And please don't stop listening or unsubscribe. Breaking bad is, well, overrated. I'm talking about. It's a six out of ten show. Oh. Six hour. Hey, that's fucking most a six out of ten. Wow.

00:35:11:05 – 00:35:40:09
That's. I wouldn't have said six out of ten. I got a bit bored towards the end. I was just thinking, fucking am I not like, let's just get this over with. So something that bores you isn't a six out of ten. Well, I mean, I'd say it's I'd give it a seven, so six is a bit unkind. When I was, say, writing this, obviously the, the betrayal.

00:35:40:11 – 00:35:57:03
If you've been betrayed that I know I did the betrayal. What did you do? Yeah, exactly. There's been, two instances. Two men. Yeah. Well, I'm fortunate to the same guy as well.

00:35:57:05 – 00:35:59:24
Yeah.

00:36:00:01 – 00:36:25:18
You've betrayed the same person twice. Fuck you love. The. I might have made some joy any time. There is a there is a third, but the third will never, ever leave my my lips. You don't even know about this one. You know the secrets where you have to. It just. You just have to keep them in your, in the, in the depths of your being, and they just don't come out.

00:36:25:18 – 00:36:49:11
Yeah. I'll leave that one. Maybe I'll tell me after this finishes. Oh I'll tell you after if anything you broke. Yes. Yeah. Because I need to get it off my chest. Tell me. Yeah. No, she she don't know. No she don't know. What have you done. And I know this is bad for me. So when I tell you it's like you're going to be like me.

00:36:49:11 – 00:37:13:14
I cannot believe it's that you. You always. You were such a nice person, Rick. I know I was young at the time. I was very young. Very young. But what? Tell me. After so, so. Well, the, the first instance, I bet my mate that I could get people believing me over him in secondary school. Maybe. Yeah, I possibly year nine.

00:37:13:16 – 00:37:36:03
So I said, I'm going to start a rumor about said girl and everyone's going to believe it. And then when it comes to fruition, they're going to ask you and they're going to ask me and they'll believe me, ABBA. And he was like, no way they'll believe me. So I started this rumor in class. It was just supposed to be like, this is nice, friendly bit of banter and started this rumor.

00:37:36:05 – 00:38:06:03
It started spreading like wildfire. It just big. It got out of hand, out control, I couldn't stop. It was something really childish. Like he said. Someone said she had a fishy family. Something like something very child. It's very, very childish. Right. But you're. You're right. Like, you know. Doesn't really. He was a child. Yeah. Yeah, exactly. So I started this, so I still, I leave just every class bang bang bang.

00:38:06:03 – 00:38:25:15
I mean, I was like, fuck it, I can't stop. This is out of control now. Yeah, it's out of control. I don't know what to do. And it all comes to kind of a crescendo. And there was a big shootout in a classroom, and the girl and my mate were arguing and shouting back and forth, and I'm just sitting there like, do I put my hand up?

00:38:25:17 – 00:38:45:17
This was she, she he spread it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Exactly. It's to prove my point that they would believe me over him. Right? You did what I was right. Yeah. Yeah, I did win. But I caused a real to do and I could, I could have I'm probably should have put my hand up and come clean. But then I for I am not getting fucking caught with.

00:38:45:19 – 00:39:06:10
And he never crossed up black. No I didn't that's what a legend. Yeah. He's a good lad. Do you still love him. That is bad. Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And, maybe he might, he might be listening to this. And then the second one, I apologize. Now if you want to say sorry about that. Well, friends don't really need to apologize, okay?

00:39:06:12 – 00:39:29:21
We're still friends, NASA. It's gone. It's gone. What's the second flight? The second one? It wasn't more of a betrayal, but, I mean, at the time, it didn't really feel that bad. I had, So when would this have been? I was maybe saying, in my, in my maybe 15 to 20 that that I dragged out a bit of a house party.

00:39:29:21 – 00:39:47:04
People came round people when it was a denim French connection jacket left him left in my hallway, a message all my mates know when I end up to it. Message loads of people, low and out and up to it. Every time I meet people. No one had no idea where it came from, whose it was and all that.

00:39:47:04 – 00:40:08:11
Like six months have passed. So that's a nice French connection. Denim jacket. I sold it on eBay. Pocketed the money. Yeah, but no one's good. Yeah. Fair enough. That's yours. One week later. All right. Guys, guys, I think I left my jacket around. News last. We got it back. I sold on eBay. I sold it on eBay. I think it was like.

00:40:08:11 – 00:40:25:24
Are you fucking having a laugh as I look? I sent out this message. I've been trying to trying to get everyone's attention for six months. I didn't want it just in my whole way. It's a lovely jacket because I know I was also there. I'm sorry. That's not a betrayal, but it's. I mean, like, you can't really sell the money.

00:40:26:01 – 00:40:33:15
You can, you know, I, I, I didn't know.

00:40:33:17 – 00:40:56:02
And know. Dear eBay, you can't say I've ever, I've ever, ever betrayed anyone. I've done anything I've ever had to apologize to you. Do you know what I mean? When I was writing the, the brand new and I. I was thinking of a time where we had fallen out or we had never. I can't think of a time never, really.

00:40:56:04 – 00:41:19:09
We've never had a really hot. The only time. The one time we did have a row I got annoyed with you is when you, Ricky, would get drunk, but then he would tip over the edge and become aggressive. Ricky. Yeah, and you lot anger in there and you'd walk along and you'd boot rubbish bins and you have so rubbish, rubbish goes all over the streets and I turn around.

00:41:19:09 – 00:41:37:14
And you would never do this now, right. But this is bearing in mind there is lots of gear and lots of beer and all kinds. I turn around. Are you. Do you know what I'm gonna say, don't you? I can't really remember. No, I remember kicking those bins and rubbish going everywhere. And just. What are you doing?

00:41:37:16 – 00:41:59:00
What are you doing? What? What are you doing? Why are you booting? Rubbish? Some people come as the clean up tomorrow. You don't give a shit. You just walk bowling around, you fucking winkle pickers and skintight jeans and you mod aircraft thinking you're the ballocks, booleans and rubbish all over the place. I call you pissing in a in a in a shop door.

00:41:59:02 – 00:42:31:03
Is that ring a bell? Oh, no, I yeah, I kind of does it that, that's why I love what people do. And you know, I know my mates do, but I was just like, that's summer. Yeah. Why you pissing in it? Yeah, I know, I know it sort of. It's one of those things where you're just like, I know, I know, I never apologize for anything, but, I, I do have remorse for doing that, as we, we all do.

00:42:31:05 – 00:42:53:01
That's the end of the theme. We're going to go into some, some of the questions, some of the, the punchy spice that, we've, we've got. And so what I will do is, we're going to kick off with someone sending in a voice note. Do you want to listen to it right now? Yeah. Okay.

00:42:53:03 – 00:43:02:04
Just orange in it. Okay. Okay. Here we go.

00:43:02:06 – 00:43:21:20
All right, boys, I think I've got a perfect dilemma for your podcast. A few weeks ago, I was added to a random group chat that I assumed was just some spam, but it turned out to be a group for organizing a Hindu. I so I'll just play along with it, and I'll get found out in 20 minutes.

00:43:21:20 – 00:43:48:05
Be a bit of a laugh. Just said I was a cousin. Three weeks later, I've recommended the hen party. Like the location, which everyone's agreed is a great idea. And payment is due this weekend, and I don't know how far to take it. I don't know if I should just turn up. Yeah.

00:43:48:07 – 00:44:09:13
What are your thoughts? Right. So he's he's he's somehow bundled himself. Some have been added to this group full of birds, arranged a bridal, hadn't been parties, recommended a venue, and they've all gone. Yeah. Great idea. And the question is, what should he do? How long has he planned this? He's got to pay the money.

00:44:09:13 – 00:44:29:07
I mean, what do you think he said? He said, should I turn up? Of course he should turn up. Like. Well, you reckon he should turn? I mean, he should absolutely not turn up for this. Yeah I want oh you've got, you got to pay and you've got to turn up. It's going to look weird, right. It's going to be weird.

00:44:29:07 – 00:44:56:09
You're going to turn up and they're going to go, why is there a man here? We've been talking to a man, but you've taken this so far. Don't back down, don't back down. Double down to put down. Yeah, I brought the Glaswegian accent. Boom. Back down. Double down in double to double down in the in the me never gives bad advice.

00:44:56:11 – 00:45:18:06
Yeah. Double down. Pay your money. Go in the handy mate. You can identify female as well. Yeah, yeah I was going to mention that so I'm glad you did. And, I think they might be welcoming as well. Do you think they'll find the funny side? No question. That was what I think is an absolute fucking monster. Yeah, yeah.

00:45:18:06 – 00:45:41:04
Especially when they're reading out the you've got to share a room of Claire and it's like, oh mate, we thought it's all going to be women. I'd love to see. I'd love to see anons, some of the WhatsApp messages. I'd love to see it just always nonchalantly replied, I love the commitment. Has he gone as far to change his profile picture as well?

00:45:41:06 – 00:45:58:05
Like because you would see that, wouldn't you? And your name and then everyone being up. If you've changed your name to a female sounding name and you've got a female in the profile picture, but how far has he gone? What do you email us back. Email us back to see you. Want to see some stuff? Yeah, we want to see some stuff.

00:45:58:11 – 00:46:18:17
And we also want to say some stuff. Stuff. His message about there he may see some stuff I want to see some some messages. Right. And also I want you to go and this is not good advice, but this is what I want to happen is you go and document some of it. Videos, voice notes, get it, maybe interview him.

00:46:18:17 – 00:46:41:20
Is this weird that I did this? That'd be good, but not be amazing. Yeah, right. The the next lad question. Yep. And we've got it's, it's a bit of a date, one along the lines of, the friendship. Okay, here we go to, to to preface this, my girl and I have been together for a little over a year now.

00:46:41:22 – 00:47:15:03
I'm gonna lay out the scenario, and I apologize if it's a little confusing. Her ex, her the ex is now girlfriend, and I all work together. So basically, there's a lot of people whose dated. They work together. Okay, great. Her ex and her have started getting shift together quite a lot. She has a bad relationship with him, but she doesn't seem to complain about having to work with him anymore since they've started.

00:47:15:05 – 00:47:42:22
So she said bad relationship with her ex boyfriend. They don't get on, correct? Yeah, right. I've also started to notice she started wearing more makeup to work. Get rid. She's telling me. She's telling me all the right things, but I can't seem to shake it. That's, you know, something is may or may not be going on now is we all take pride in our appearance, and she's gonna down.

00:47:42:24 – 00:48:01:22
It's. You're straight in there. Big down there. She sees what she's she's trying to get back with the ex or that it's already happened. All of them in their. Oh that's that's a lot of wow. That's like all of the men I of the.

00:48:01:24 – 00:48:07:12
All of the men in that office.

00:48:07:14 – 00:48:28:17
May. Oh, oh. Oh, yeah. God, no, she's all right. She just putting on a bit of makeup. I don't think it means anything. Just chill out. Hey. Yeah. Okay. I'm along. That line is. Well, it's just, you ever wants to feel good, don't I? And if you put a bit of makeup on, you feel good.

00:48:28:20 – 00:48:48:21
Like if you wear a nice, like Lance, if you wear a nice looking jumper or pair of shoes or whatever, you just what you want to feel good. And if you're going to work, you want to make an effort. You don't want to go into some slob. Yeah. We so we would dress up more. We dress up better going football than we would going out for dinner with our misses, but 100% more.

00:48:48:21 – 00:49:05:10
Yeah, because it was more important, wasn't it? In that instance, it was like, I want to do better for the boys and I do want to look for my missus. So to this day, weirdly, it is true. Anyway. Yeah. It's weird. That is weird. Yeah, but I'm not looking for the boys. There's another thing here, right?

00:49:05:10 – 00:49:33:08
Is even if she doesn't get on with him, my experience is that she will still see that girl. There being some level of competition. She would always want to look as good as, if not better than, the girl that's going out with him. It doesn't mean that she she's interested in him. It just merely means I think that she wants she's in a competition to some degree, and or certainly she just wants to the parts.

00:49:33:09 – 00:49:53:05
She doesn't want him to think he's done better. That's that's what I think it is. I don't think that this means that she's cheating on you. I just think that she wants to look good because her ex-boyfriend's there with her new with his new girlfriend, and she just doesn't want to feel insecure, insecure about that. So she just puts makeup on.

00:49:53:05 – 00:50:15:10
That's how where my brain would be. And she doesn't mean that she doesn't want to admit it. She probably finds out a bit embarrassing that she wants to do that. So don't fear. I'm pretty sure that's what. What's happening? Yeah. I, 100% agree with that. I don't know where. So that one, didn't put my there from unfortunately.

00:50:15:12 – 00:50:34:12
Let's say Peterborough. Yeah. Peterborough. Okay. So, Peter from Peterborough, you got nothing to worry about. Yeah. Nothing to worry about. You all good, man. You're all good. Good. I wouldn't even bring it up. Just let it go. Don't worry about it. And if it turns out that she is, then, you know. Listen, she isn't the one.

00:50:34:14 – 00:50:57:11
Move on. Good. I never really I never a someone who's never had their heart broken. I'm not in a good place to say, but you're just like, if someone breaks up with you, just like, man, there's loads of women out there. Do you not even like when you were when you were, even a school crush? Yeah. When you were like, yeah, yeah, seven year old.

00:50:57:15 – 00:51:22:03
I remember a name. I remember her name. Fleur. I loved her so much to a couple, actually. Fleur. She just, She she I really liked her. I've been betrayed. I've been betrayed? Yes. And know I've been. I'm not. Yes, but. Yeah, I've been betrayed. Pretty fuck. Okay. That's good. Yeah, yeah. So the when when I was a kid, I was 16, 17 is going college.

00:51:22:05 – 00:51:45:07
And there was a girl I fancied called Fleur. Really fancy the College of North East London, Tottenham campus. So we went fucking shit out and I was like, I just, I think I love her. And, And then I told my mate, who at the time would consider, like, my good mate spent a lot of time in the same social circles because we went to the same college.

00:51:45:07 – 00:52:08:05
See, Shyam, if you listen to this, Shyam, you know you are. He went out with her and he knew I liked her. He knew it. I told, night. You know what though? I think they were actually already going out secretly when I told her. But I had no idea. And to be fair to him, he was really felt really bad about it.

00:52:08:07 – 00:52:35:19
So I can't really hate him for that. It's not useful. You I like I fancied a and he he used to turn up at college and dressed in suits and shit, so I had no chance. Yeah. I didn't want you to see it sometimes. Come to this college like dressed to the nines. Like like smart, very smart. And I always thought is a bit over the top for, you know, A-level English.

00:52:35:19 – 00:52:53:16
But she likes it obviously. And they were together for a while. Fair play to her and did not I mean so yeah that would be it. But yeah that was unrequited love. That was tough. I thought about her a lot and it never happened. And then there was another one. Who? Andrea. Same thing. College of North east London.

00:52:53:18 – 00:53:09:06
I end up going by that and so got on and, and but she was lesbian and I knew she was lesbian, but I fancied a lot. I fancied a lot, probably partly down to about, you know, maybe she was a lesbian. And, I went to a house. It was like. But nothing ever happened. And that's what I'm saying.

00:53:09:06 – 00:53:25:09
Like boys and girls, we were friends in college. Friends. But I fancied her so much. And even though you knew she was a lesbian, that you thought you would, I didn't ever try. You know, I just. I knew that it was just one of them things. Why? I just want to want to, but never have a that was like one of the things.

00:53:25:09 – 00:53:49:07
And I respected it. I never did anything. Then fucking six months later, she went out of a boy fuming, oh, what a fucking fuming. Yeah, I can, I can see why you'd be, fuming with that. I mean, regardless, you didn't fancy me, did she? Obviously. Otherwise something would have happened. If you ever get any of these two, ladies up on Facebook or anything like that.

00:53:49:08 – 00:54:09:04
No, then I don't know, I said. I just know the first names. I don't know what I sometimes I'll, Shame. Yeah, I would, I wouldn't, I would be curious like the internet. Internet. But I mean, I searched her up but can't find her anymore. Oh, no. Yeah. That, Well, no, not that I'm glad that, I broke up.

00:54:09:04 – 00:54:28:05
I had betrayals, but I'm glad, you broke up with her on New Year's Day, but, well, the internet go. Yeah. May. Tough one. Why do you do what you do on New Year's Day? I don't I don't think I was thinking properly. I should have left it a bit, but I kind of felt like I had left it a lot by then.

00:54:28:05 – 00:54:47:23
I couldn't do it by Christmas. I didn't want to ruin Christmas. And then I'll only indulge if I can't fucking keep doing this. I've got a teller. Got teller. Yeah. You went, you went for New Year. New me, quite literally. Yeah. See this? It struck that 12:01, you're like, fuck this. What I meant I met my then girlfriend that, you know,

00:54:48:00 – 00:55:20:20
Okay. Yeah, that was at college. North is London as well. Jesus Christ, I don't know. Eric. Yeah, I know a lot. Well, I've got one more question. It's not really a question, and it's quite straightforward. One what I think is and this is how it's, Yeah, we'll probably answer the same. So the last slide, if one of your better mates is constantly trying to solicit you and your missis to sleep with him and his girlfriend, would you still consider them one of your better mates?

00:55:20:22 – 00:55:31:18
I'm. That's coming from California. So they want a foursome? Yeah. Four dogs.

00:55:31:20 – 00:55:56:16
I can't imagine a place where I ever thought I wouldn't like even taking it down a notch. A threesome? Yeah, I'm just not. I'm not that guy. Yeah. No, no, I would not that I, I wouldn't say I was ever, certainly not with a mate and not with my wife, but nothing. I couldn't think of anything worse than watching one of my mates banging my wife.

00:55:56:18 – 00:56:18:06
No, nothing. Nothing is worse than that. No. So. So now I. Look, if this couple fancies and you and it's like it's in your open to it that we want, right. But it sounds like he doesn't like it. So it needs to stop immediately. Yeah. You need to tell him let's stop fucking trying to buy my wife. I don't want to bang yours.

00:56:18:06 – 00:56:42:19
Yeah, exactly. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And it would be, Yeah. You need to tell them. And it's just if you're uncomfortable with it, just let them know that you're uncomfortable and just. Just stop asking, because that's just. I'm not. I don't even know how people get themselves into these positions because it's just fucking. It's so alien to me that that side of the the.

00:56:42:19 – 00:57:09:00
Well, I've changed my mind to just do it. You only live once. Just do it. What's the worst that can happen? So what, you break up, okay, just do it. Do it and let us know that. Yeah. On that we're going to end it. I have to say, just do it. So if you have Apple Podcasts, Spotify, please, please subscribe or follow.

00:57:09:02 – 00:57:28:05
And if you even have two minute leave review that there's there's one review. Actually that's a lie. There were more reviews on Apple, but the more you do the reviews, the more you give us the ratings, the more that you subscribe and follow, the better the podcast does. So please keep doing it. And if you haven't done it already, please do so.

00:57:28:05 – 00:58:04:12
And much love. And if you want to follow us on Social Lad and on Pod Instagram, tick tock Twitter lad. Anon pod. Is that easy? Next week, next episode we are going to be featuring the theme life in lockdown, life in lockdown. So any hobbies you picked up? Anything that I know why you loved it and we know anything that you did, anything that you want to you will ascend into lots.

00:58:04:14 – 00:58:32:02
Anything that you want us to discuss, get advice on anything. That's a hobby that is now with you from lockdown, but you still kept the email us lads and on pod at gmail.com. That's lads. And on pod at gmail.com. And you could have your shit featured. Yeah. Until then, can I just count before we end? I've just found this.

00:58:32:04 – 00:58:53:06
There's another Gareth Flavell that exists. He lives in Birmingham. Should I tweet him? See if he wants me up for a fight? I. I think you should. Isn't you fat? Aren't you originally from Birmingham? Aren't you like your family? From my mum's. Got my mum born Birmingham. Like I'm going to message and say, look, I know it's a bit out of the blue.

00:58:53:08 – 00:59:27:22
Hang on a second. Flavell. His name's Flavell. He hasn't tweeted since, Is he? It's in September 2023. But what should I write? I might just say we've got the same name. Just seen your called Gareth Flavell as well. Yeah. We should probably be up for a fight and sort this out. Yeah, exactly. Probably me for a fight.

00:59:27:24 – 00:59:31:09
Sort this out.

00:59:31:11 – 00:59:42:16
So this out right. Tweeted feedback next week. Lovely.

00:59:42:18 – 01:00:06:02
The night I see like Band of Brothers playing Jones high as quite midnight waves surfing through till daylight breaks rhythm. Here's different ways. Love of music that we prayed with our tongues in cheek. Band as I we like to speak. And yeah, times change. But no matter what the bond remains. Promise.