#115 | Worst Purchases We’ve EVER Made

00:00:01:00 – 00:00:27:14
Ricky. We're recording. Boy. We are recording. What we. I don't what are we talking about? Well, first of all, yeah, it's happened again. It's happened again. And Ricky's car broke down again. I had such a good run for. Right? For such a good run. Well, there was nothing I've given up to Manchester and back. Not a fucking dicky.

00:00:27:16 – 00:00:47:19
No engine light? Nothing. Nothing. Prov. Nothing. What happened? Because you haven't even told me about this. Haven't even put this in the group. No, I know, I'm sick of. I'm sick of talking about it. Really? I'm terrible. I'm sick of, talking about that. My car's broken down, and then I'm sick of, you and Alex coming back to me, going just these.

00:00:47:21 – 00:01:04:17
Oh, yeah. This is what I don't know. We can't keep having this conversation. I know that I don't want to bore you guys. I don't want to bore myself talking about this. I said as soon as he started, I'm gone in my head, forgetting that I've ever mentioned it before. So why don't you leave? Carry on. I appreciate I appreciate it's expensive.

00:01:04:20 – 00:01:28:08
I understand that I'm not saying it's not expensive. It is. Yeah, but you need a car. It's a it's as essential. It's as essential as my mobile phone. Easily. You need to move around easily. There is that. But you're not willing to. You would you would I don't know what was it? Can you afford to do it? Can you and your missus.

00:01:28:08 – 00:01:49:20
No, no, no, that's the thing. I can't what you're saying money bags. Mrs. ain't can't like she she's not money bags at the moment. When will she be at the. No fucking not sooner. No. Sorry. Soon. Soon. Ricky. See fucking back in that school off immediately. Fuck that. So. So at the moment we're going through this, process.

00:01:49:23 – 00:02:26:22
She was working Monday to Friday. Yeah, as a teaching assistant. And she has now reduced her hours. So she works full time Monday and Tuesday. Yeah, but she's free Wednesday, Thursday, Friday. So she's going to start filling those days up with people to teach to drive. Yeah. But but so at the moment, while it's whilst we're waiting for those days to be filled up, then you know, I mean, look you can you, do you have the money to buy a new car if I only if I sell this car.

00:02:26:24 – 00:02:46:05
And then who's going to buy that piece of shit? I don't know, I need to trick someone. No one's buying that, Rick. No one's buying. If I train it really nicely and put loads of smells in there, I think I could trick them. But you need to work it out. You need a car and Lisa is the way forward, and I and I and I think is as well.

00:02:46:05 – 00:03:11:08
Sometimes I don't really use my car that often now I'll use it twice. To me, there are times I go out to my car and there's cobwebs on them, on it. That's how much I use it. But for the car that I've got, it's like a 2.2. Mazda Sport diesel thing, and I don't do far enough trips for it to, for the for the engine to run long enough.

00:03:11:10 – 00:03:30:02
That's one thing. And and I'm just doing short journey. So it's, I'm doing journeys that's not supposed to be built for that car. No way. That's not what breaks down. It's just old Rick. How many miles is it done? It's done it all. Over a hundred thousand. And it's a petrol. Cars. Not diesel. No diesel. Oh, diesel.

00:03:30:05 – 00:03:55:16
Okay. Yeah. Probably could get another 100,000 miles out of that. Exactly. Diesel. What's wrong with it? You lost. Do you know what? I don't want to say this to my missus. Right, but what I will say. Is she right in the car? I drove? I drove to Manchester. She's literally. She teaches people to drive for a living. She she and she's she's a wonderful teacher.

00:03:55:18 – 00:04:15:18
Not great. And she will be able to teach people to drive really well. Yeah. But there are times when I'm on the motorway and I'm like, Donna, are we are we still in fourth gear? But you know what? Why is it sound is we need to go up in gear. Is, But I drove to Manchester. Drove it back.

00:04:15:20 – 00:04:41:03
Not a dicky. It's been fine. She goes out to drive, comes back. She just went to pick the girls up from school. Comes back? Rick. The, The orange engine light came on. How is this, like, maybe coincidence? Maybe coincidence. Right. But, but but she hasn't used it since I've been driving it. Everything that's gone away real good.

00:04:41:03 – 00:05:08:15
Real brave. So fine. She used it yesterday, and then I go to drive it today. And it's just like, juddering, like loads really bad. What is going on? Well, he's going on now. That's twice this is happens after driving. So I've, I've spoken about this over night. Do you think I dare bring that up. Well surely she can hear you mate.

00:05:08:15 – 00:05:30:18
Maybe she can hear me, but I'm on a pod so she can't get me at the moment. And she's got lessons after this. So there's going to be a big period where there's going to be cool enough time. So she can't fucking get a cup and get me, dad. Yeah. It's, And I'm driving to Brighton tomorrow, so, and it's like a two hour, 45 minute drive from my house.

00:05:30:18 – 00:05:53:22
What are you. Are you. Well, you're in your car. Well, it's supposed to be in that car, but it's in the garage at the moment waiting for them to say it's fixable. We can do this or whatever or you're fucked, mate. What I need to do is I. I'm going to have to call my dad, right? This is going to call my old man.

00:05:53:24 – 00:06:15:09
And I've explained to him the car's fucked. He's going to have to drive his car to my house tomorrow morning. Where does he. I'm going to get. I, I it was a 45 minute drive. Yeah. And then I'll have to get insured in his car and I'll drive to Brighton and it'll be fine. It'll all be fine and work out in that regard.

00:06:15:11 – 00:06:40:21
He's got like, I can't remember what it is, but it's it's like a micro machine. It's like made out of tinfoil. It's like, what is what is it? Yeah, it's a can I what what, like a kipper? Can I have a look at a kipper? Can I? And it's just. Well, we'll we'll be cruising down to Brighton at 55mph because that's the speed it will go up.

00:06:40:23 – 00:07:06:05
I say drives it. Yeah, if you get one of them credit. Yeah, well, I mean, you know, I've. What, what what's, what's what. Can you, what can you afford to do. No, not a lot really though. Just it's just going to have to be lots of juggling. Really. Why is it that. Cos, like, do you ever have this much issue with your cars?

00:07:06:07 – 00:07:27:14
I mean, no, it was new when I bought it. I mean I've got an in, I've got an orange, orange light on my about, about the, the lever pedal or something like that. And sometimes the cruise control goes a bit funny, but it's three years old now, so brake pads need I I've to be honest, three years old.

00:07:27:14 – 00:07:47:22
Is it, is it old for a car? No, no, certainly. Don't look, it's not about 35,000 miles. Really? Yeah. No. My dad's. He's he's out of Range Rover because he's got a Range Rover evoke. Oh yeah. Yeah. Right. He's had that car for like, Yeah. Four years. He's had it. You know how many miles he's done?

00:07:47:24 – 00:08:15:19
Four and a half. Yes. Oh my gosh. 4.5 hours. And then these cars make you feel much at discovery and why. All you do is drive to Morrisons is. But, but literally all you're talking about cars not designed for short rides. That drives his car. Two minutes to Morrisons, gets to dinner, drives it back. I said to him, you're not wasting 70 grand of my heritage inheritance on that fucking on a car.

00:08:15:19 – 00:08:38:18
You'll never drive. Yeah. Now your mind, my fucking. Oh, man. Just I just I'm so sick to the back teeth of cars. My luck with cars. Oh, family knack for cars is a fucking. It's just that car. It's an absolute nightmare since you've got it. Yeah. I mean, I've had it two and a half years and it's just been to hell.

00:08:38:19 – 00:09:04:22
The thing is, as well, when I. I used a, a, company called Trick Mechanic and they, I said, paid £150 for a mechanic to go out, and they do like 150 point check. So I did all the due diligence to make sure it was fine. And he came back and said, yeah, apart from a bit of, you know, structural rust and blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, ten year old car, you, you know, you gravy with that.

00:09:04:22 – 00:09:23:13
And I was like, right, sweet. Yeah, mate. He says it's fine. But I didn't think at the time, but do you think if these mechanics go into dealers and then the dealers go for bang, you own a quid or a couple hundred quid? Just tell them it's all right. Do you think they would do that or.

00:09:23:15 – 00:09:40:11
Yeah. Back in the day when you had, like, dope or running parking lots, I don't think now. I mean, there's an ombudsman and regulation involved. Other mate. I mean, maybe, but if they do that what can you do? You can't control the situation, so don't worry about it. That's what I would say. Yeah. Fucking it as you, Mrs. new car.

00:09:40:13 – 00:10:02:07
Fantastic. God, it's really great. Yeah, I know me. I, I've got such a cash flow issue at the moment, but I've got obviously payments for cars coming out and this is not interesting at all, but invoices from the builders coming in, and just basically not having enough money and having to move things around in order to get things done.

00:10:02:07 – 00:10:19:19
It's, it's a pain anyway. Very boring. It'll be all right. I'm not starving to death or being blown up, am I? So can't complain. Yes, that's a positive, a bloody positive. So I run the jingle. Yes. Pays.

00:10:19:21 – 00:10:46:12
The night I see, like, Band of Brothers playing tunes. Hi. Is quite midnight waves. Surfing free till daylight breaks. Rhythm hit us different ways. Love of music I we prayed with our tongues in cheek. Banners I we like to speak and yeah, times change. But no matter what the bond remains. Promise.

00:10:46:14 – 00:11:08:13
Go rig. Hello and welcome to. That's Anonymous. It's episode 115. I'm Ricky, he's flat. Two best mates. One main topic we answer your life dilemmas and confessions in our feature. Something only you know. And everything remains anonymous. Always. So sit back, relax and enjoy the podcast. Apart from everything else. Rap. How are you doing mate? You good? Good.

00:11:08:13 – 00:11:35:23
Yeah. Yeah. I mean, like I said before, it's like a stressful part of my life for sure. Busy working, recording, trying to find ways to make more money raise, you know, just just because it's got a little bit on top. And, it's all self. I mean, I did it to myself. Yeah. You know, I mean, it's like the,

00:11:36:00 – 00:11:59:08
Yeah. So it's, it's it's it's fine. It will be fine. It's six months from now. Will be it will be absolutely fine. But right now it's tight. Things are tight. Yeah, but it's fun. Yeah. It's like like I say, it's not like I can't, it's not tax. It can't afford to buy food for the family. It's tight because we took on this big project and there was going to be a bottleneck at some stage.

00:11:59:08 – 00:12:25:06
And that it sort of arrived because it's it's so on top of that your VAT payment payments corporation tax bill due in December. So it's like understanding and juggling cash flow. And you know I'm like Rick, I'm not a spreadsheet kind of guy. I don't I can't write it all down. So like even if I write it down I'm still I'm a more of a feelings and vibes kind of guy when it comes to money.

00:12:25:08 – 00:12:51:10
And so, you know, at times I've thought, you know, what's that? What are we talking about today? We're talking about what is it? Worst purchase. Yeah, we're talking about our worst purchases. Yeah. Like so this this definitely won't be the worst personal purchase I've ever made. This house. But I was saying. I was saying to the wife, I was like, if if you would have told me when we bought this, agreed to buy the house.

00:12:51:12 – 00:13:15:19
Yeah, this would be the cost of doing it up. Yeah. I would have never done it. Not in a million years and not in a million years would I have even considered it. I'd be got in. That's out of our reach. Let's not do that. Yeah, because that's crazy. But once it's done, we will have a house we could have never have afforded.

00:13:15:21 – 00:13:45:09
Right? So maybe. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Fear would have got in the way of something that could end up being super good. Yeah. So it's definitely not a regret. Although if, if, if I, if I reversed time. Rewound time to. Yeah. Being in November last year when we first arrived are offering I would have gone. No obviously.

00:13:45:11 – 00:14:02:01
Obviously not. But does it does it for like Grand Designs where they're doing it and it's like, right. We need to do we didn't realize this had happened. And you've got, you got to find more money and it's just, oh, for fuck's sake, what? Where am I going to find that? What am I going to do?

00:14:02:04 – 00:14:21:12
Yeah. You started. You can't stop. You can't stop. There's been. There's been periods like that. You can't stop. That's the thing. You gotta keep going forwards. You have to. But. So there have been moments where I thought, I don't know where I'm going to find the money to do this. And you get creative. You start asking people for money.

00:14:21:14 – 00:14:41:02
Yeah, that was my bad. Yeah. You know, you said you're going to give me that. I'm going to cut it, mate. It's not going to cut it anymore. So yeah, there's been a bit of that. There's, there's also that there's been moments in the, in doing it, but you find things obviously it's an old house so you find things.

00:14:41:04 – 00:15:06:06
But what you don't expect seasons one of the exterior walls about to fall down. Oh yeah. That's not, that's not I do is it the but we've got a builder. If I was doing this on my own, I wouldn't. I would have had a mental health breakdown by now. Yeah, but we've got a builder and I. When he's ready, I'm going to really promote his he's business because.

00:15:06:06 – 00:15:37:21
Yeah. He he's really, he was excellent. He's been excellent. And also found ways to save money for me. So I would I would find started going out and finding these quotes and then he'd go, you don't have to pay that. This is what it's going to cost. I can do it for you. So for example, there was a particular piece of work that involved a lot of messy removals of the house, but cereals and stuff, and it was quite five and a half grand.

00:15:38:01 – 00:15:56:19
And he said, you can do this for a grand 800 to a two grand. That's how much I charge you. Fuck. How what? How much do you think he was putting it in a van and driving to a field and then just letting it go? I just did it for pure. I know you know, he's flytipping. Flytipping. Yeah.

00:15:56:19 – 00:16:13:08
Yeah. No, he. No. Because you get in order to remove the materials, you have to get a certificate of removal. You can't just put it in the bag. So it's like things like asbestos and other things. Yeah. When you go to the skip they say, are you a business? Is this like from business removal or is this.

00:16:13:08 – 00:16:34:22
Yeah. But as I said, when you put the job in, you have to get sick of removal. So, when I'm commissioning the work, it gets given to me, like your gas safe, like a so your heating safe or your Byron is, like, approved or regulated. It's like a regulated removal. It's no all got done. It's just that these companies, especially asbestos companies, just charged a fortune.

00:16:34:22 – 00:16:53:05
Really. Anyway, so there's bits like that. And then obviously you go in there and your Mrs. is like, wouldn't it be nice to have paneling? Yeah, it would be nice. Of course it would be nice. Yeah. I'd like a golden cock as well. It's 12in long. That would be nice. Yeah. So that got done. And then the builder obviously has ideas.

00:16:53:05 – 00:17:12:02
And I guess this is where, where you know well you know he has saved this money in some areas. He's he's also like planted ideas which we really like the cost money. So he's like why don't you do this? And we're like that is a great idea. And you just say yes. And then you're like a week later, I haven't.

00:17:12:02 – 00:17:27:12
Hang on. Well, how much is that going to cost? Oh it of course isn't that fuck like so one of the other things requested last year I've. This has been building up for a long time. You asked me before we started how was the house? He's. You're getting all of it now, may I ask you every single fucking week and you just say, I don't want to talk about it.

00:17:27:12 – 00:17:53:07
And then we just carry on as though that questions never come up. So what do you want to hear about it? So yeah, flooring cost a fortune. I didn't realize how expensive it was. What what what flooring you got? What the whole house is, was shits wreck. It needed. It's been gutted. So everything's. We had to pour new flooring.

00:17:53:08 – 00:18:20:17
No concrete down. It was. Oh fuck like that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We had half. So. So it's basically two cottages built into one knocked through. So there's just two cottages and half the floor was wooden and the other half in the modern, the sort of more recent cottage was concrete, but it was old, so it was crumbling. So they had two different levels.

00:18:20:19 – 00:18:43:03
But it was one room. Yeah, yeah. Right. And then when they started bringing up the the old flooring in the kitchen, what did you find? You find rotten wood. Well, wood and good and good. White wood is the last thing you want to find anyway. So, there's that and then there was this. We've made we we're making it into a five bed house as opposed to four bed.

00:18:43:05 – 00:19:06:09
Hello. Yeah. That there was an attic room that needed to be finished. It was half done. And so him to build a staircase into the new attic room in order to make it regulated. If that works, and it passes building bricks, then we can register as a five bed house. Which means, of course, when if we ever sell it, it'll be worth more money than what it is now.

00:19:06:11 – 00:19:22:23
I mean, that's that's lovely. And thank you for sorting my spare room out for giving me some stairs. So, yeah, you would need those. Yes, but that's what something about my mum. And that when she comes in she's getting, she's, she's 73 now. So there may be a time when she needs to get up there I don't know.

00:19:23:01 – 00:19:53:16
Yeah, yeah. Fuck. You know, you're thinking about it. Yeah. What about you? What's, What do you think? I mean, like, with the the expenses and stuff. Is it kind of like a, Daniel Levy Stadium situation? Well, I think he felt like he's. He's paid all that money. We're paying all that outlay, and it'd be a shame to have a magnificent stadium and then to have just normal chrome tabs that you'd find in a school boys toilet or something.

00:19:53:16 – 00:20:17:23
Yeah. We haven't. You got a great big you've got a, you've got like. Yeah. The floor has been put in that morning. Yeah. Exactly. And the kitchen was expensive and, and we haven't even got to the bathrooms yet. Maybe we can't afford the bathrooms. That can come later. We've got a, we've got a bathroom, which is, but you know, the there's a, a guest bathroom and then there's a shower room on the kids where the kids section of the house is, say, a section.

00:20:17:23 – 00:20:44:16
It sounds like a mansion. It's big, but it's not like it's just two. How two small houses put into one. Basically. Have you got buckets for toilets as well? Yeah, we've got toilets. We're running things like. Yeah. So pick me up. It will be fun. I'm No, I'm good. Apart from this fucking, car business. Apart from that, just puttering along as usual.

00:20:44:18 – 00:21:08:10
Before we get into the topic today, what was going to say? Oh, by the way, I sent you a voice note. I saw, good, good. I just made a note on the running order. We put out a request last week, I believe, for, oh, two tickets way. Oh, yeah. Anyone can hook us up.

00:21:08:11 – 00:21:33:12
Can anyone get us anything? We have had a reply. It's not for the O2, though. Hey. Heard yours. Call for tickets. Just throwing it out there if you're ever in Dallas. I got floor tickets to the Mavericks everywhere you can have to enjoy. Obviously a long shot, but let me know and I'll make sure it happens. Love y'all's show.

00:21:33:15 – 00:21:56:08
It's not safe. Wherever, if wherever in Dallas we've got, math tickets. What's my floor? I think it's, the the Dallas Mavericks. Is that basketball? Is that what they called that? I've just made an assumption there, I love it. I if I had to guess, I would say I'd say I say basketball Dallas Mavericks. Yeah.

00:21:56:10 – 00:22:23:00
Yeah. This came from the gentleman that has, submitted a dilemma previously. Do you remember the gentleman that was seeing a work colleague of the work colleague was his senior manager? Yeah, she had a husband. And the relationship, he wanted more. She was still married and, Yeah. Yeah, yeah. And he's pert, by the way. The married girl I sent y'all my story about.

00:22:23:00 – 00:22:49:19
This is so hard to say. Yeah, yeah, it really is. Yeah, yeah. We don't say it. It about, divorced, that story I sent in, she divorced her husband, and now we've been dating ever since. Thanks for your help. I really. Yeah, we have this. We have some one. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Bit of housekeeping quickly. I forgot on quick.

00:22:49:19 – 00:23:32:17
You've Ricky on the patron to do the fantasy Premier League update. First place Starship Troopers, and that's Josh loss. I'll blow this up then I it's how you pronounce it. And that's Varun and then harshest united James. So those are your top threes at the moment. I languishing in ninth. If you want to join the patron, do the FBO, watch the videos of this podcast, listen to ad free podcast, all the other features, go to patron.com/lads a anon pod.

00:23:32:21 – 00:23:58:07
Today we're going to be talking about our worst ever purchases. Now, I was a bit of an idiot last week and I went too quickly and I dive. I was one of my stories already. The chili. Yeah yeah yeah yeah. Did you end up buying any chili chili? Chili sauce on that? Yeah I did, I did buy some chili sauce.

00:23:58:09 – 00:24:20:02
I bought three bottles of different types of chili sauce because they came as a no, they didn't come as a free. I just bought because, you know, like chili sauce, you can get chili sauce whereby it actually taste nice, like you've got different types of veg or fruit in, some of it is sweet, some of it sour.

00:24:20:07 – 00:24:44:24
And even though it's got that fucking it's got the heat hit in there still quite nice. Yeah. It's nice, it's nice what I've been, I've been on the search for it for, for years. I'll say, I normally have a dash of Tabasco in my bolognaise. Tabasco is not that hard, is it? It's not. Right. So this is what I'm getting on to this.

00:24:44:24 – 00:25:07:02
Have it. Dash it. Tabasco on my bottle of nice. Yeah, a chowmein I smash it about the gas. Yeah. It's nice, it's nice. And then. And then Tabasco. Do I have a Nero Tabasco, which takes it up a notch. Now, I've got used to that heat. I want something more. But I'm looking for a different something like Tabasco.

00:25:07:02 – 00:25:32:01
That same. You know, you've got used to the heat of the Tabasco. So you want. You're looking to up it a notch. Yeah, yeah. So I went Tabasco original. Yeah. Upped it to habanero Tabasco. Now I'm looking to go higher. Habanero is quite warm. Yeah, habanero is all. Yeah, yeah, yeah. No not massive hot. I don't think it's like scotch bonnet fucking.

00:25:32:05 – 00:25:52:14
I happen around Scotch bonnet raw. Sort of comparable I what I yeah like it's not too bad. It's not too bad. Like, I don't know if you ever have the regular reggae sauce that has a little. I love that I'm not that for ages. So it's still about ten. I'm talking about. Yeah, yeah, yeah I normally yeah, I normally have the like a barbecue sauce of that.

00:25:52:14 – 00:26:18:04
So not not that. Yeah. But that has, that has Scotch bonnet in that and it's not, it isn't like unbearable but has a little kick to it. So what. So what. So you so is the habanero. Habanero Tabasco. Tabasco. Rick, why don't you can't go wrong. It's really obvious. You've got you've probably got something in your cupboard, but there's some decent heat on the,

00:26:18:06 – 00:26:39:23
Oh, man. What's it called? Jamaican. What, that in corner? Yeah. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. There's there's a hot ones of those but. Yeah. And I forgot the hottest one of that. I find a bit of a bit too much for me is it. Yeah. It's not, not the standard one. The, it's the one with four, five chilies on it.

00:26:40:00 – 00:26:58:10
Extra hot pepper. That's it. Extra hot pepper. Yeah. That's too much. That's too hot for me. I don't enjoy that. But I like the other encounters. Yeah, maybe I should have a little fucking dabble in that. Maybe. I think that's like you. Do. You want to. You do want to upgrade? Yeah, I do want up it, I do.

00:26:58:15 – 00:27:18:10
You know, when you kind of been doing something, you just get used to it. So I'm just looking to, looking to build on that. Yeah. I mean, how does this sound and kind of offers you. It's extra hot sauce with extra strong flavors, which is prepared from three varieties of chilies the happy Nero pepper. So, yeah, happy Nero.

00:27:18:12 – 00:27:42:05
Yeah, yeah, yeah. And that's what you're having already. Yeah. Yeah. We I think maybe you sit in it. What do you think that is then. Do you think that you just you've it's over time you built up a tolerance to it or. That's exactly what it is. Is it. Oh God. Well just wanted to I think like culturally like obviously your, your, you, your bloodline would be one that comes from spices would be massive.

00:27:42:05 – 00:28:05:09
Yeah. In that. Yeah. Whereas mine is English would be and Welsh. So spice wouldn't have been a big part of our diet at night. Naturally. No, I wonder whether you build up the tolerance things probably more likely in it's because like you build up a tolerance, right? Yeah. When I was a kid, my granddad, he would say he bought he.

00:28:05:11 – 00:28:30:00
When he visited India, he got a specific red chili. He got a cutting from it and brought it back to Spain to grow. So he grew quite a lot. And my nan, she used to cut them like make a slice down them, dry them out. And then he would, put a batter on them, fry them and just eat them like, oh, so chili batter around it and eat it.

00:28:30:00 – 00:28:50:19
Just sitting there watching telly. And one day I was like, granddad, they, they actually hot. And he was like, there's only one way to find out, right. Oh, God. Just tell me to granddad. Oh my God. Yeah. There's multiple ways I can find this out. I can go on the internet and ask other people. You can tell me there's loads of ways I can find this out.

00:28:50:21 – 00:29:10:19
So I bit into it a bit into half of it. And then after free churns, spat it out and the he was insane and he was laughing so hard, you know, when people slap their knee. Yeah. Because they're just so fucking I you just sit your grandson up to fuck him. I was going to lie about that shit.

00:29:10:21 – 00:29:35:24
Where are you at? Like tricking kids into eating stuff you know, they're not going to like, because I'm all for it. Like, yeah, yeah, yeah, but watching babies bite into a lemon is the best I do, you know, literally, maybe ten days ago, a photo popped up, you know, memories and stuff, right? And we were somewhere with Amelie when she was, very young, baby.

00:29:36:01 – 00:29:57:19
And you were in the photos, and Donald was like, do you remember this day? And I said, no, not really fucking like 40, 14 years ago. Yeah. Well, she was like, Gao kept going. If you giving how many a lemon should we give her a lemon? Yeah, yeah, I'll, I'll come by lemon. We'll watch cherry.

00:29:57:21 – 00:30:16:08
So I don't remember that, but that's, That sounds exactly like me. What they did, did we do it? They I think we I think we did do it. It's great, man. Like, there's another one when there's another one when, you know, you seen that little baby, it goes wasabi. Because you you won't like it. It's hot.

00:30:16:09 – 00:30:38:15
Yes. I'll be. And she eats it. It's you. Just looks. I'll just help you listen like that's the thing. Is that wasabi. Wasabi. A lot of people could find that wasabi too. Too hot. But that's exactly the. That sensation is so pleasurable to me. Bizarre. Be mustard and you can put too much mustard or mustard can be overpowering by volume, but it's different from spice.

00:30:38:15 – 00:31:00:20
It's like a different thing from a pepper. As per pepper, hot peppers hit you in a different way, whereas mustard is very much sort of nasally and nose and and touch and tongue on the back of the tongue. Yeah, yeah, yeah. And the throat. Whereas having too much, too hot a pepper that you can't handle it, your body goes into shock like, yeah.

00:31:00:22 – 00:31:21:22
The funniest thing, the, one of the funniest things I've ever seen, Kriss Akabusi a beefy Kriss Akabusi, his Guinness Book of Records. Remember that, record breaker, a record breaker. So that's a whole show is just made up. And you and they video people breaking records for the Guinness Book of Records. Right. The Guinness Book Records for the Americans.

00:31:21:22 – 00:31:38:14
I don't know if you have it over there, but it's a it is essentially a book of people that hold records for doing very impressive things and stupid things as well, like how many Maltesers can of money in the in a in a minute, and someone somewhere will hold the record for that and it'll be in the Guinness Book of Records.

00:31:38:16 – 00:32:00:23
I used to get it every year when I was a kid. I've got, I've got on Instagram, I've got a folder with Guinness Book of Records that I've saved, laser reels where people have broken records. The I reckon I could break and one day it's all got genuinely and I mean this from the bottom. My heart is genuinely a dream of mine to to be in the Guinness Book of Records, to break a record for something.

00:32:00:23 – 00:32:21:05
And I'm just trying to find the right one that I reckon I could do. Mate, I'd love you to do that. It'd be, well, funny. I'd love for you to be in the Guinness Book of Records. Anyway, there was this Chiesa, and he was doing the Guinness Book of Records for the most roly polies you can do in a row.

00:32:21:07 – 00:32:49:02
And I'm not just talking about, like, a bloke who, like, you know, you see down the pub, he reckons he can do it. He had all the gear he had, like padding, like a specifically designed, costume that been protecting his back and stuff. So he was all kitted up. Anyway, he obviously does the roly poly. There's footage of him boldly prowling all over Britain, and then eventually, obviously roly poly into the studio.

00:32:49:04 – 00:33:12:06
And he's sitting there and they do this segment and, you know, they talk to him like, how well done, full roll police. And he's like, yeah, it's good. I'm good at roly poly. That was the standard on television back then anyway. So they've moved on. He's done a segment about 5 to 10 minutes long. They've moved on. And Kriss Akabusi is now talking about the world's hottest chili.

00:33:12:06 – 00:33:29:04
So in the Guinness Book of Records, you also have things like the hottest chili that exists in the world. Yeah. And he's got one in his hand, and he's saying that there's a man who's eating this in these houses, the Guinness Book of Records. He's a Mexican man and native to his age. I can't remember what it was that the specifically.

00:33:29:04 – 00:33:56:12
But you can imagine people are growing up less eating spicy food. They become able to eat these fucking peppers and roly poly mangoes, Ollie it. Is a this obviously wasn't in the script. What do you mean? Ollie? Ollie, those are Ollie. Well, actually, I'll go in the books. I'll be the one. And, that could be. He goes.

00:33:56:12 – 00:34:17:13
I don't think he should. And then the producers come in like, we don't think you should either. But this is the Guinness Book of Records. Yeah, you you can do it. This is what we're all about, right? He's. I can give me the pepper. I can eat the pepper. So he's chewing. He takes two. He takes a chew turn pepper in his lap.

00:34:17:15 – 00:34:40:00
You know. You know what he's about to say. You know what he's about. So. Yeah. What is your website? Yeah. It's not that hard. Look out. Oh it's not like oh no no, no. And then he whacks another bit in for fun and he's sitting there somehow he thinks because he can do a thousand body poses in a single go.

00:34:40:02 – 00:35:03:17
The the the laws of spice and the human body won't apply to him. Oh, they apply to him. By the end of the show, he had to be taken to hospital in an ambulance. That, he said he thought they thought he was going to die. That's how bad he's just. He body shut down. He got he got too dizzy, did a nice rowdy polies and got too confident and so funny when the minute you realize that.

00:35:03:17 – 00:35:20:17
Oh, my God, I can't handle this because I thought this was, like, really powerless. Mate, I'd love to find that so funny. The realization. And then he's like. And then he has to go, like, lie down on the floor. And then they sort of cut away. And then there's just a picture of him, an ambulance driving off.

00:35:20:19 – 00:35:51:13
Great. There's, wait a fucking. How do we even get to touch it? All right, that's it. Because I said effect. Yeah, yeah. Yeah, I fucked that. The, one of the I will I do have a couple of my worst pets is the first one was this one surprised me out of everything. You know, when you've been looking forward to something so much that you think this is going to be this is going to be life changing for me, almost.

00:35:51:15 – 00:36:18:20
It's a lot of money. I saved it waiting to do it. I put myself an Apple Watch, brand new Apple Watch to go with my MacBook Pro, Apple phone all connected up, all seeing all that. I'm just online all the time with my Apple products. I fucking hated it. Why? I absolutely hated it because it was. Do you know what?

00:36:18:20 – 00:36:40:14
This is going to sound really stupid. It wasn't my Fitbit, it wasn't my Fitbit Sense two. My Fitbit Sense two gave me everything and what I needed it to do. I got something in my eye, and you know, when you think of the thousand things I learned about Apple Health. Yeah. I mean, it doesn't it doesn't.

00:36:40:16 – 00:37:03:17
All right. Like it was just different. And, you know, when there's, the the outlay of something is different. And you just used to, like. Yeah, different things. And, like, you go to the home screen and it's not there. And then in the end, because everything's connected, just my phone is just my wrist is just pinging all the time with emails, WhatsApp, text messages, and I'm just like me.

00:37:03:17 – 00:37:24:22
I'd like, just fucking leave me alone. So in the end, I turned off all notifications on my on my watch. So I've got a fitness watch that isn't really that designed for fitness. And I've turned on the notifications off and it's like unlinked. Now to all my Apple products. What am I even doing with this thing on my wrist?

00:37:24:24 – 00:37:49:24
I just resented it. After ten days, send it back on and off set right as well. I sent it back to the company. Their instructions weren't particularly clear, so I sent it back off for a refund. And then it said to go for me to go onto the website and fill out another form. So there was another form I fill fill it out and it was like another refund form.

00:37:50:02 – 00:38:21:19
So I was like, this bit weird. I fill that out anyway, I sent it in, they responded me for the watch and they refunded me for this bit of paper that I submitted. So I got double bubble. Oh, so you got two refunds? Yeah. So yeah, like, do you know your Fitbit fucking well with you? No joke with Fitbit they they will without question send you a so so you say your Fitbit watch makes sense to it just breaks right.

00:38:21:21 – 00:38:46:04
Or you get water damage or you fall over and you smash the screen. They, without question, replace the product. You don't need a receipt. You don't need nothing. And I'm like, it has to be in the warranty though I don't know. It doesn't. This is this is what I did, right? My watch I stopped using it. Was I old right?

00:38:46:06 – 00:39:07:05
And I contacted them and I said, because Sam, I met Sam Peoples, he, I have to say settings. It's so ridiculous. Sam. Whenever I think of Sam, I say, Sam people's Sam people's right. He's, he just runs Man United channel. Amazing, mate. It's insane. Do you drink? Like, what is this geezer from Essex doing talking about Manchester United?

00:39:07:07 – 00:39:36:13
He has like, 600,000 followers. He's massive in Africa, huge. I can't make it. Look at these demographics. They fucking love him in Africa. Yeah, yeah. Anyway, I digress. He said they replace it, they'll just replace it. And I was happy cos it was two years old. Of course they won't. And that's how, why? And I've started figuring it out is because their model, how they make money isn't the watch.

00:39:36:15 – 00:39:59:18
You have to buy the watch. Obviously they ain't the strap, it's the subscription. And once you're subscribed, right, you don't leave. Yeah. It's much more likely that you would leave if your watch breaks. So they just replace it. Honestly mate, if you. How well how old are your sins to I got funnily enough, this is a replacement.

00:39:59:20 – 00:40:16:15
Yeah. This has got to be. Oh, it's a year old. Is a year old. Just get another one. Just ring them up and just go. It broke and I have another one. I promise you, they will not challenge you at all. Do you subscribe to it? Yeah yeah yeah yeah. They will not try to get another one.

00:40:16:15 – 00:40:34:06
What is their new version of it. Yeah I would say I'm going to. Yeah I'm going to go and have a look. Yeah. He's still got your Samsung Galaxy one. I haven't, I haven't worn it I haven't worn it I will I will go back to it. But I did quite like that. It wasn't as intrusive as, as an Apple Watch.

00:40:34:08 – 00:41:06:01
I tell you what I did do right. But, in terms of a regretful purchase, watches. I bought a Casio G-Shock watch when I was pissed. Yeah. And we said, was that that like that lime green? Yeah. The green. Green. Yeah, yeah. And the and the face is hand-painted with, like, pink flecks. Oh, God. And I like, I like when I was drunk, I was like, yeah, you can get them can to get that.

00:41:06:03 – 00:41:32:21
That'd be nice. I haven't I don't have a nice timepiece, I have, I had a fucking £350 and I'm like, oh my God. Really? Yeah. There's like a range of shocks, a bit more like up up up up up up up, up. Expect to pay £100 for. These like hand painted ones and I fucking hate it. I got it and I was like why have I bought this.

00:41:32:23 – 00:41:52:01
Yeah. It's just in my tea cupboard in one of the mugs now are you. Oh you still are. You still got it. Where else would it be? What do you mean? No, I'm gonna chuck it away. I'm. I just I said sell it on. Oh, yeah. Probably need to build a. Yeah, exactly. Set it on, buy three bricks for your house.

00:41:52:03 – 00:42:20:14
And then you look at those bricks. I mean, year and you just think my watch did that. There you go. I see it start flipping what I. Well, we start flipping watches. One more, one channel and trainers as well. I do that trainers club. I don't think I know anyone who buys as many trainers as you do, and the training is that you buy for me a wild.

00:42:20:16 – 00:42:41:18
Yeah I so I someone I know you think I was Jake because I of the trainers I wore. Yeah I mean I, I flamboyant. Yeah I can understand that I can understand yeah I've calmed down a lot Rick, because it is getting expensive, like, you know, like a pair of Nike Air Max ones are like £170 now.

00:42:41:20 – 00:43:16:06
Like Maddie's fucking. What? Yeah. Yeah. It's just. Jesus Christ. But you also go, so you get colorways that people 155. But there are there are others who I might look at these. These are wellness. £1,100. That one, that pair. Good, good. It's a collab. Anyway, my point is, Some. Really not sure.

00:43:16:08 – 00:43:42:07
It's just don't get it right. That is the point is, the point is, Rick, what's the. What was I saying? The, the trainers that you buy, that flamboyant. See? No, I have any trainers you buy in and shoes as well. These are in the sell. Legalities. They never have the size. Size ten is, like, the most popular one.

00:43:42:09 – 00:43:51:11
Anyway, so. Yeah, my these are, these are classed, but no, the the point I'm making, Eric, is.

00:43:51:13 – 00:44:13:24
I don't I can't remember what you need stuff, but I'm, I'm trying this I'm closing the, the top down. It's gone now. Yeah. So, Yeah, it was it. But but the thing is, is when obviously when the house wasn't there, I didn't have to I little bit more disposable income. Now I have money and I will have nothing now because this will won't end this house.

00:44:14:01 – 00:44:46:05
Yeah, yeah, yeah I remember the these is they like these ones were, you know, the outline of your toes in, rips, you know, so that I would buy, I would spend a fortune on those. That is the greatest trade that ever made, in my opinion. Are you fucking crazy? I'm not joking. I'm not. I'm not. So. So the air riffs, they originally, I want to say kind of like 97.

00:44:46:07 – 00:45:06:03
Not between 95 and 97. Yeah. These trainers came out and they are they for the people. The thing that people get fixated on is the split toe. So the big toe is split from the rest of the foot, and it freaks people out. Yeah, I love it. And and they, they look like kind of like sandals, I guess.

00:45:06:03 – 00:45:26:21
And they've got a Velcro strap at the back and strap goes across the bridge of the foot. You cannot you cannot buy those now. You cannot find them. And if you've got a pair like the original green and black pair are worth a fortune. Now, if you had a pair and you're able to sell them between thousands of pounds, fuck.

00:45:26:22 – 00:45:45:03
You know, and everybody hates the monstrosity. Yeah. No. Yeah. Jesus Christ, my brother had about 5 or 6 pairs. That's why I get it from. I think my brother Rossi's right. He's the buyer. Yeah. Now, I would not regret buying those. You can get them in women's sizes. Weirdly, they reproduce a bit men's. They don't. You don't seem to be able to find them.

00:45:45:05 – 00:46:06:12
That is fucking weird. Yeah. One. But before we, we're not before we wrap up, but I do want to give a, speak about one of my worst. Do you know what? It wasn't my worst ever purchase, but it was a purchase that I had. It was a it was a purchase that I live to regret.

00:46:06:12 – 00:46:29:12
And it was all my own undoing. And I might have said this. I mean, I have said this story before, but, maybe not on lads and on, but I got into one of those January. I'm fat. I need to do something about it. There's a there's a gym where I live. Really lovely gym. And, I'm going to sign up.

00:46:29:15 – 00:46:57:02
I'm going to sign up, I'm going to pay the money and I'm going to get myself one for the summer, you know, one of those ones. And I signed up. They told me to go and collect the card and stuff. And then I had to have, introductory and at, meet someone, meet someone called gym. Get taken around there and show me where the weights are, the changing rooms and stuff like that.

00:46:57:04 – 00:47:19:23
And when I arrived there and I spent a up, you know, went on people, but were not maybe not bored, but everyone was on reception at the time and I said, I'm here to have my introduction. They said, hey, you haven't introduction with. And I said, it's someone called gym. And they said, who? And I said, it's gym.

00:47:20:00 – 00:47:44:17
And they said, are you sure? I said, yeah, yeah, yeah. They've been sending me emails, Jim. I spoke to him on the phone and it turns out that nobody could gym actually works there. And it was. They were signing off as gym. It's from the gym. Yeah. So that was, there was a miscommunication. So I had to go in there, do an introduction with the utmost shame, the biggest shame.

00:47:44:17 – 00:48:04:09
And I just know that they were they were giggling for that about that for weeks but never went back to the gym, carried on paying it, never went back. Could go back. Fucking insane. I, you know I might have seven description to easy gym from about eight years ago. I wrote a check. How would you not know that you've still got that?

00:48:04:11 – 00:48:24:03
I just I don't know, I don't know, I think I, I kind of see it come out on my bank account, but I'm thinking I've got to sort that out and then, you know, because the, I know I'll, we'll check after we finished recording that, maybe you can, if you wanted to go back to Easy gym, they said anything.

00:48:24:08 – 00:48:48:04
Well, you know where I am. They don't have him here. I mean, I've I've got myself into a right pickle is, there's a bloke who walks her up to where I live in Devizes. Very small. Right. So you bump into the same people all the time. Yeah. And, there's a bloke and he's, like, started talking about the gym, and I was like, he's our personal trainer.

00:48:48:06 – 00:49:05:18
It's all right. Yeah. Okay. Because I want to get. I need to lose weight. It's a bit more shape. I need to do something where I move. I sit here for eight hours at a day in front of this computer, and I'm not moving. Like I bring the dog to walk. Walk or walk the dog this morning, but it's not enough anyway.

00:49:05:18 – 00:49:27:14
So I'm saying to him, oh yeah, oh, sorry. I'll come. I'll come and sign up immediately. Regretting it as soon as I hit left my mouth that I'm saying I want to. Yeah. Purchase a ten week course with this man who, is a personal trainer, and that's his living. Yeah. And now obvious when I'm walking around, I see him and I'm like, fuck it, there he is.

00:49:27:14 – 00:49:43:08
A promise to subscribe to a ten week training personal training course with Glenn. I don't want to. I don't want to do it. So what's going to happen, Rick, is I'm going to force myself to do it just because. Embarrassment. What do I say to him? I don't I didn't mean it. I don't want you to be the one that's happened.

00:49:43:10 – 00:50:04:23
Is that what I say, Rick? How do I get how do I get out of this situation? Then you know what I'm thinking, Rick? How do I get out of this? Mean? These blocking, just moving. I'm going to moves in. This won't be a problem. I have done the very same thing this week. So. So, so an advert on Instagram, Milton Keynes.

00:50:05:04 – 00:50:25:21
This is gym and the recruit in the is like the glory 100. We need 100 men aged 40 plus that want to go on the six week kind of course, six, eight week course, where we kind of like a militant kind of get you in shape and all that lot. And I was like, okay, let me see how much it is.

00:50:25:23 – 00:50:43:12
And before I knew it, I had submitted my details and I was like, God. But they're going to they're going to get me. I and I thought it'd just be an email to say, hey, the price is, do you want to get they ring me every day. They text me every day. I've block their text messages and they keep calling me of different numbers.

00:50:43:14 – 00:50:59:06
It's fucking mad and I don't know what to do. I don't know how to get know. I'm not. I'm not interested in there. Like, why didn't why don't we set up a just come and have a look at the gym? Rick, just come and have a look at the gym. We'll book you in. Are you busy Wednesday and they're not really, like, really trying to get me and I'm on it.

00:50:59:06 – 00:51:15:09
In the end, I think I'm just going to have to I'm going to have to do it. And I, I mean, would it be the worst thing in the world? It wouldn't be the worst thing in the world. But as, as I mentioned, with the, the finances just not worth doing it at the moment. Just not worth fucking doing it.

00:51:15:09 – 00:51:32:02
Tightening the belt. I don't want to do it. Christmas is coming. It's it's never wanting to do it. It's just being polite to the man. And now I've got this problem. It's like, that's the thing, man. It's like when you go on, when you, you know, you're walking along and there's like the charity, the charity people, they fucking do my thing.

00:51:32:02 – 00:51:40:01
I do, they do my head. Yeah.

00:51:40:03 – 00:51:49:13
Yeah. Charity people. I if you doing nothing,

00:51:49:15 – 00:52:14:24
These charity people. Ricky And they say to you, they say to you, what do they say? They say, come on, it's for kids. They starving and they're dying. And I'm like, yeah, crap. That's fine. Okay. What do you want? 6 pound them up. Fine. All right. Take my 6 pound. But don't fucking call me. Don't call me during the day because I previously, you know, I've shown a moment's kindness.

00:52:15:01 – 00:52:34:08
Don't ring up asking for more money. So know your game. I know you've got a sales team that's going to call me up on a Tuesday from a number in Nottingham, and I'm not going know where it was, what it's from, and then you can ask me for more money. And you, it took me again. You know, I'm putting Ivan through school in, in Africa somewhere.

00:52:34:10 – 00:52:56:05
Yeah. Yeah, yeah, they're doing that. Yeah. Really? Hey, how do I stop, mate? Rick, how do you stop? You tell me how I stop doing that, then I've got. This is now a lifetime commitment until he's 18 and then he's going. It's not 18 year, 18, 18 there. I still need support. Can you, just refresh it?

00:52:56:05 – 00:53:20:08
If anyone doesn't know who, yeah, yeah, yeah. So I, I pay not a great deal amount of money, but it's relative, isn't it? Money to put this kid put. Ivan, I was it was a bit suspicious when I was like. His name's Ivan and he's from Uganda. That doesn't sound right. But I didn't want to be, like, racist, so I.

00:53:20:08 – 00:53:42:01
I just went along with it. Yeah. And I base it. All I do is pay for his schooling for, every year because where they live, there is essentially a free educational. I don't even know if it's Uganda. It's a country in Africa I can't remember. I just pay the money and get the photos in the videos, and that's what happens.

00:53:42:03 – 00:54:04:03
And the and the and then, so, so you can go to school. It helps fund the school when they build the building, sort of like places for them to learn and, it's a good thing. And, you could kind of see where the money's going and you can see him getting better and the work he's doing and so it is quite good.

00:54:04:08 – 00:54:19:18
And then about of, sometimes there's like, they need new mattresses. So like, like Ivan doesn't have a mattress. I can only sleep on the floor, actually.

00:54:19:20 – 00:54:43:24
It can't be that bad floor. Hear. But it's obviously again is relative. So the cost of a mattress isn't what it's not. Got a great deal of money. And you. Yeah. You you get a picture of him not on a mattress. A picture of him on a mattress. And you're like, well, maybe that is a good thing. And you're like, yeah, I mean, in London it's cost of a couple of pints, like a cup, 3 or 4 pints in on a night out.

00:54:43:24 – 00:55:06:13
It's like it's nothing really. So yeah, it comes to the update online, I, Ivan's, he's progress. Though they did send me a picture of once with him in a Chelsea shirt. So, yeah, I remember I said if that. If I ever see that again, it'll be fucking, mention them. And I said, shall I send him a Spurs shirt?

00:55:06:15 – 00:55:28:17
And they said, no, actually, well, what happens is, is there's like they become like targets. So if you buy them a brand new Premier League shirt, it's like gold dust. So the chance of him, it not being taken off him or being bullied or Kane like a target. So what you have to do instead is send over if you want to send them gifts.

00:55:28:19 – 00:55:54:03
A, shoebox of which I have my, a shoe box full of, like, you know, things like that, drawings and like that. So, it's like stationery sets and things that I can use, and coloring books and stuff that I used to love when I was a kid. But obviously things have moved on. Like, my kids don't like coloring in books, like, no, that's boring.

00:55:54:08 – 00:56:12:01
They like lifting a shoe on their phone. Yeah. Whereas so. So yeah. And then if you have a toy box full where you can kind of share it with his brothers and sisters and stuff like that. So, That's nice. Yeah. I mean, the, the I love the, the updates of what Ivan's up to what he's been doing with the money.

00:56:12:02 – 00:56:34:08
Keeps the other name wrong. Well, yeah, that's, Well, he I think he thinks I'm a woman, but I've never corrected them, so he says mummy, mummy and puppy flat because that's my name on Facebook. Flat. Right. So they call me. Yeah, yeah. Sometimes his mummy flat and I'm not what I do in school. I can see my face.

00:56:34:08 – 00:56:52:16
I'm clearly a man. But that's the opposite of what we're talking about today, because I, I was going to say this is, this is this is not our worst ever purchase. This is just, it's just come up. Before we round this off, I will go through a couple of other people's, stuff that they have submitted.

00:56:52:18 – 00:57:22:15
And someone said their worst ever purchase was Reebok Pumps as a me fucking out Reebok pump. That's a fucking great purchase. When you were a kid, it didn't do anything but the, the marketing scheme for sure. But yeah, they make you feel like on top of the world. I remember when my dad came back from Spain and he'd bought me a pair of trainers and they were called Les Brock.

00:57:22:17 – 00:57:46:08
And I was like, why they call blessed Book. And he said, that's the Spanish. So I was like, I should have tweaked that. You could pump the tongue up. But they also had an air bubble at the back. So double whammy. Both. Yeah, double whammy. One of, one of the lads I grew up with, he still, every time I fly, spot him in Milton Keynes, you always say, hey, you still got those?

00:57:46:10 – 00:58:12:17
But, pop? Dad, fucking don't believe them as well. And now I did that, I believe him. Someone else, electric drum kit off eBay. But it had no power cables, so this electric drum kit just sat in the house and they didn't buy a single fucking Bentley. Just got chucked away. Yeah, exactly. Tottenham shirt they bought in 1995 with Fox seven.

00:58:12:19 – 00:58:37:01
That's because they couldn't afford any of them. You know, the, the numbers and because they're at uni, you know, Fox is all right. I like Fox a real fox. That's fun with the you know what my my stepmom did, we didn't go to the sports shop because she was quite handy with, like, she was, she was like she used to make things and do like she could recover an armchair, for example.

00:58:37:01 – 00:58:59:09
And like, she's really good at sewing and stuff. She cut out at eight in blue material and put it. Yeah. And stitched it to the back of my shirt. She was trying to do a nice thing, but, you know, that doesn't fly when you're in a playground. Do you wear it? Course. Oh, boy. Is there any special?

00:58:59:09 – 00:59:25:19
Yeah, it was the, It was the Burgett kit 92. She, That would've been a nice kit. Yeah, yeah. Good kit. A lot of it. Well, for people messaging with the same engagement rings, but worst ever. But she's, They are crazy. Yeah, they are expensive. But I can tell you that by the time you.

00:59:25:21 – 00:59:42:23
I so expect to be broke up with it. Yeah, yeah. If he broke up with a girl, you've dropped, like, five grand on it. Give me the fucking ring. Unless you. Unless you do to cheat. You know something, then you shouldn't have it back. Then she should be able to sell it herself. But if you're if it's if she's playing you, she.

00:59:42:23 – 01:00:06:16
You need that back. I think. And she needs to get you a ring. If she cheated on you, there needs to be more. More. You get a ring back. Yeah. Yeah yeah yeah, yeah. No, I, I appreciate that. Yeah. I would take that back and Tottenham season tickets I mean yeah it's a, it's a bad purchase last year I mean you paid over a grand to feel utterly miserable.

01:00:06:18 – 01:00:25:11
Yeah I can you imagine going to going somewhere and knowing before you've even left that it's going to be a two hour door to door journey, you're going to be out in the cold, it's going to be dark. It's going to be raining. Knowing that you're going to watch your team lose. It's fucking soul destroying. I'll do it, though.

01:00:25:13 – 01:00:42:17
You got to got a cup at the end. We don't have to do it I don't anymore. No, I know that I still I mean, I still enjoy it and I still enjoy it. Right before we go on to, dilemma and something any you know the topic for next week, I hope we have something to play. Oh, fuck.

01:00:42:17 – 01:01:07:17
Yeah. Good. Well, yeah. Well remembered. You'll be playing. Yeah, yeah. Topic for next week. So the topic for next week is the we were there stories. So I might be a personal one. Like watching your mate lose his virginity. And that's the legendary story between you and your mates. Watching you mate. Yeah. I have one I've got.

01:01:07:19 – 01:01:26:07
Because that is me. You. You watch your mate lose his virginity. Yeah. Did you, I don't know if that's not against the law, but, I mean, I was pervy 14. What was you with a couple of other people? I got other people as well. Good. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, I've got something similar as well. When I lost my virginity.

01:01:26:09 – 01:01:53:24
Oh, God. Yes. Good. Do you know that? Yeah, sure. I'm sure you noticed. Now, I don't know. I don't tell you. Next week. So, sports match or being at the Athletics, you know, with the Olympics. London Olympics. Were you there? A special kick where a guess came out that no one knew was coming out. Well, anything, a mental event in your hometown, like a mini earthquake in Milton Keynes.

01:01:54:01 – 01:02:03:03
I was there, I was up by. Remember it sent your stories. And when they found the Somerset camp.

01:02:03:05 – 01:02:19:00
That would be good. That would be a good one. My favorite send into lots of non pot at gmail.com and we shall read your stories out. Or like we're about to do now. We will play your voice tonight. Oh yeah.

01:02:19:02 – 01:02:41:22
Hey, lads. Big fan of the pod. Send a voice note before, it's just wanted to send in a, voice note about the topic of things that you would not, you think wouldn't pay for, again, experiences. A bit of a twist on it. So beaks, bird supporter here. Came over to the UK last year, during the winter bee injury crisis.

01:02:41:24 – 01:02:59:11
So ten games on the game that we won was Manchester United, won the Carabao Cup and every other game we fucking lost. And I'm like, what am I doing here? Why do I keep coming to this? I spent obviously quite a bit of money because Spurs tickets are expensive and there was a campaign to bring you back to Australia because we kept we kept losing.

01:02:59:11 – 01:03:22:17
I honestly, I was like, what the fuck am I doing? I could be enjoying my time in Europe, traveling around, but going back in and out of the UK to watch us. But it was also one of these ones that I know that I would do again, even though it kind of makes no fucking sense. But yeah, bit of a twist on that one, but, keep up the great work as always, boys.

01:03:22:19 – 01:03:39:24
Yeah, I think we've all felt like that. I mean, I've, I've traveled across the world to do it, but, yeah, it's a long distance in here and then straight. Yeah. It is. Yeah, yeah. So that I mean, I can understand that being your worst purchase, but, you know, you got to you got to see one win. That's good.

01:03:40:02 – 01:03:56:23
So you know, you got to pick the positives. I just had to look at the time. I'm going to do the dilemma. I'm going to save that for. So I will do something. You know.

01:03:57:00 – 01:04:04:21
Wow. Something, you know.

01:04:04:23 – 01:04:31:15
I've been living a lie. Good. My my wife is divorcing me because of my so-called porn addiction. They've got, er, coaching porn addiction. I. Already this can be the greatest, we've ever had. I want to be clear. I've never, ever cheated on my soon to be ex-wife. But she may have a point that I watch too much porn.

01:04:31:17 – 01:04:59:22
The thing is, it's not like I have a fetish for a type of girl. I've got so many categories I enjoy, I'll bang one out to anything I, you know, dwarves, redheads, stepmom's. I don't care. Anyway, it all came to a head and I promised her I would stop looking at it. I know it was going well. One day she was out picking the kids up from school and taking one of them to their swimming lessons.

01:04:59:24 – 01:05:23:12
I thought I had a bit of time to myself, so I booted up the porn, grab some lube and tissues and away we go. Where is it with the lube? I don't know, I was bashing the bishop, watching some woman getting railed when the sound came out. I thought, that's a bit weird. It's probably part of the video.

01:05:23:14 – 01:05:51:21
A shite upload. I was needy there, so carried on and thought nothing of it. All of a sudden I heard the front door swing open almost off its hinges, and my wife bellowed from the bottom of the stairs, turn off right now! Oh! It turns out she'd popped home because she forgot my son's swimming goggles. As she pulled up on the driveway, my phone connected to the Bluetooth in our car.

01:05:51:23 – 01:06:16:21
The wife and the kids heard what I was listening to and that was the last straw. She told me to pack my bags. My family and friends know we're splitting up, but I've told them that we've just drifted apart and they don't know I'm leaving a porn lie. And that is something I need. I know and will ever know.

01:06:16:23 – 01:06:36:06
Oh my. I mean, how much could he must have been watching? I know, I know, I was, I how much you watching it? What do you do if he, if like you say, do you, do you fancy fancy cuppa. I'll go to the cake while he's watching the the kettle boy, he's fucking pulling up porn. He's just watching it.

01:06:36:12 – 01:07:00:09
Is there any time he gets. He's just watching it. How much porn can you watch? Right, I don't know, I, I don't know. It's like, I don't know how you. Your partner needs to know about it. How? Why you can't just when she's not around or just not do it when she's around. I don't, yeah.

01:07:00:10 – 01:07:22:24
I don't. Is he leaving like jiggy tissues around? Like what? What are you doing? How are you getting caught? Yeah. How are you? I mean, what if what if you're if your Mrs. is aware that you're masturbating all the time? I can imagine that was quite irritating. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I mean, yeah. Is it that is said, what do you.

01:07:23:01 – 01:07:46:00
I think it's one of your mates that every time that, they're not in the same room together. Yeah. It's our collective friend. Yeah, it's. Yeah, it's just wanking. Yeah. She thinks he's he's I asked, I literally I was asking him some questions about the, the other day, not about that specifically, but about, Well, let me just find it.

01:07:46:02 – 01:07:58:19
I love it. It's the best he said it, and it's one of the best things I've ever heard. It's just whenever he's not in eyesight is his wife. Just assumes he's masturbating.

01:07:58:21 – 01:08:20:17
Which is, Right. It's crazy. The topic for next week is the we were there stories. Send it in to lads. Anon pod at gmail.com and we will read them out. So until next time patrons, we'll see you today. Friday. The normies. We'll see you Monday. See you later.